In this episode of Families Navigating Addiction and Recovery, I talk about the patterns that can keep families stuck when addiction is present.

These patterns can show up in repetitive communication, nervous system reactions, family roles, cultural beliefs about addiction, and the way family members respond when they feel hurt, afraid, or overwhelmed. When these reactions repeat, they can feel automatic and leave families feeling like they have no other choice.

I explain why recognizing the pattern is the first step toward changing it. You may not be able to control your addicted loved one's choices, but you can begin to change your side of the interaction and create different conditions within the family.

We also look at the difference between black-and-white thinking and Both/And thinking. Black-and-white thinking can lead us to immediately believe our first reaction is the whole truth. Both/And thinking creates room to slow down, consider multiple perspectives, ask better questions, and respond more intentionally.

Another important part of this episode is boundaries. I explain why boundaries should not be created in the middle of an argument or when your nervous system is highly activated. Clear boundaries require you to first determine what is okay, what is not okay, and what you will actually do if that boundary is crossed.

We also discuss:

• Why "detach with love" can be useful but may not be the only long-term strategy

• How reactive communication can increase conflict

• Why boundaries need clear, realistic consequences

• How unspoken family rules can reinforce unhealthy patterns

• How journaling can help identify repetitive behaviors and communication

• Why curiosity and listening can create more productive conversations

• How families can begin creating conditions that support health instead of reinforcing addiction

The goal is not to control another person. The goal is to recognize where you do have influence and begin changing the patterns within yourself, your relationships, and the way your family operates together.

🎧 Follow or subscribe to Families Navigating Addiction and Recovery for more conversations about addiction and family recovery.

⭐ Leave a review and share this episode with someone who may benefit from it.

About Jeff Jones

Jeff Jones helps families impacted by addiction understand how addiction affects the entire family system. Through his coaching, masterclass, book, and educational content, he helps families create clearer communication, healthier response patterns, and a different way forward.

If your family is navigating addiction and you're looking for a different way forward, I invite you to schedule a free discovery call with me.

Book a free discovery call:
https://www.thefamilyrecoverysolution.com/book-a-call/

Brain Health Masterclass for Families Impacted by Addiction

This six-week masterclass helps families understand how addiction affects the entire family and move away from confusion, emotional overload, and constant reaction.

Learn more:
https://www.thefamilyrecoverysolution.com/masterclass-upgrade/

Rethinking Addiction: The New Family Recovery Solution

Jeff Jones offers families a different way to understand addiction by looking at the family system as a whole and introducing practical tools for communication, boundaries, connection, and healthier family patterns.

Get the book:
https://www.thefamilyrecoverysolution.com/rethinking-addiction-book/

Connect With Jeff Jones

Website: https://www.thefamilyrecoverysolution.com/
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/jeff-jones-0303834/
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@thefamilyrecoverysolution
Substack: https://jeffjones.substack.com/

#FamilyAddiction #AddictionRecovery #FamilyRecovery #FamilyBoundaries #AddictionSupport #CommunicationSkills #NervousSystemRegulation #FamilyPatterns

In this episode of Families Navigating Addiction and Recovery, I sit down with Jeanne Foot, CEO and founder of The Recovery Concierge. Drawing from her personal lived experience with generational addiction and trauma, as well as her professional journey navigating the mental health system as a mother, Jeanne breaks down the complex world of therapeutic placement.

We discuss why traditional "cookie-cutter" rehab and 12-step programs do not work for everyone, how families can avoid the trap of sponsored Google ads when searching for treatment, and what it looks like to match a client with the right level of trauma-informed care.

Jeanne shares how taking a concierge approach, meeting people where they are, sequencing treatment properly, and addressing whole-body healing can help individuals and families move beyond basic stability toward resilience and flourishing.

🎧 Follow or subscribe to Families Navigating Addiction and Recovery for more conversations about addiction and family recovery.

⭐ Leave a review and share this episode with someone who may benefit from it.

Jeanne Foot is the CEO and founder of The Recovery Concierge, a boutique mental health and addiction placement agency based in Toronto, Canada.

With decades of personal long-term recovery and clinical training in NLP, trauma-informed care, and intervention, she acts as a navigator and advocate for families and individuals seeking holistic, customized recovery paths across North America.

Website: https://therecoveryconcierge.com/

Podcast: Naturally High https://naturallyhigh.transistor.fm/

Jeff Jones helps families impacted by addiction understand how addiction affects the entire family system. Through his coaching, masterclass, book, and educational content, he helps families create clearer communication, healthier response patterns, and a different way forward.

If your family is navigating addiction and you're looking for a different way forward, I invite you to schedule a free discovery call with me.

Book a free discovery call: https://www.thefamilyrecoverysolution.com/book-a-call/

This six-session masterclass helps families understand how addiction affects the entire family and move away from confusion, emotional overload, and constant reaction. Families learn how to develop steadier, more intentional responses and create healthier patterns within the family.

Learn more: https://www.thefamilyrecoverysolution.com/masterclass-upgrade/

In Rethinking Addiction: The New Family Recovery Solution, Jeff Jones offers a different way for families to understand addiction by looking at the family system as a whole. The book introduces practical tools, Both/And thinking, clearer communication, and family rules that are stronger than addiction's chaos while maintaining connection with the person you love.

Get the book: https://www.thefamilyrecoverysolution.com/rethinking-addiction-book/

Work with Jeff: https://www.thefamilyrecoverysolution.com/

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/jeff-jones-0303834/

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@thefamilyrecoverysolution

Substack: https://jeffjones.substack.com/

#TherapeuticPlacement #TraumaInformedCare #AddictionTreatment #MentalHealthRecovery #FamilyRecovery #AddictionRecovery #FamilyAddictionSupport #GenerationalTrauma #HolisticRecovery #TreatmentPlanning

In this episode of Families Navigating Addiction and Recovery, I sit down with Colin MacDonald and Hayley Caddes, co-founders of Not Therapy.

Both Colin and Hayley bring powerful, transparent lived experiences from the "troubled teen" industry, including early behavioral struggles, high-risk choices, psychiatric wards, wilderness therapy, and therapeutic boarding schools.

We discuss the major transition gap young adults face when leaving structured treatment programs, why traditional clinical therapy is not always enough, and how peer mentorship can fill the void. Colin and Hayley share advice for parents on shifting away from fear-based decision-making, setting reasonable expectations, and building long-term, trusting relationships that allow young adults to develop genuine independence.

🎧 Follow or subscribe to Families Navigating Addiction and Recovery for more conversations about addiction and family recovery.

⭐ Leave a review and share this episode with someone who may benefit from it.

Colin MacDonald and Hayley Caddes are the co-founders of Not Therapy, a mentorship and life coaching company that pairs young adults ages 16–25 with coaches who have overcome similar mental health and behavioral challenges.

Colin MacDonald grew up in Seattle, Washington, and spent his adolescence navigating ADHD, treatment programs, and wilderness therapy before becoming a life coach and educational consultant.

Hayley Caddes grew up in Utah and California, holds a master's degree in Chemical Engineering from Columbia University, and previously founded a peer-support mental health platform for Gen Z women.

Website: https://nottherapycoaching.com/

Program Overview: Not Therapy serves young adults ages 16–25 nationwide. The program begins with an in-person home visit from the coach, followed by ongoing virtual mentorship.

Jeff Jones helps families impacted by addiction understand how addiction affects the entire family system. Through his coaching, masterclass, book, and educational content, he helps families create clearer communication, healthier response patterns, and a different way forward.

If your family is navigating addiction and you're looking for a different way forward, I invite you to schedule a free discovery call with me.

Book a free discovery call: https://www.thefamilyrecoverysolution.com/book-a-call/

This six-week masterclass helps families understand how addiction affects the entire family and move away from confusion, emotional overload, and constant reaction. Families learn how to develop steadier, more intentional responses and create healthier patterns within the family.

Learn more: https://www.thefamilyrecoverysolution.com/masterclass-upgrade/

In Rethinking Addiction: The New Family Recovery Solution, Jeff Jones offers a different way for families to understand addiction by looking at the family system as a whole. The book introduces practical tools, Both/And thinking, clearer communication, and family rules that are stronger than addiction's chaos while maintaining connection with the person you love.

Get the book: https://www.thefamilyrecoverysolution.com/rethinking-addiction-book/

Work with Jeff: https://www.thefamilyrecoverysolution.com/

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/jeff-jones-0303834/

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@thefamilyrecoverysolution

Substack: https://jeffjones.substack.com/

#YoungAdultMentorship #MentalHealthSupport #PeerMentorship #FamilyRecovery #AddictionRecovery #FamilyAddictionSupport #WildernessTherapy #TherapeuticBoardingSchool #ParentingYoungAdults #NeurodivergentYoungAdults

In this episode of Families Navigating Addiction and Recovery, I sit down with Shiva J, a somatic facilitator, certified Tantra educator, relationship coach, and founder of The Sacred Kings.

We explore a topic that touches every healing, coaching, and family dynamic: integrity, accountability, and power dynamics.

Drawing from his background in personal defense, somatic psychology, and men's work, Shiva breaks down how automatic power imbalances form whenever someone steps into a guiding role, whether as a coach, therapist, or family leader. We discuss why traditional hierarchy often fails, how restorative justice models create horizontal safety, and how embracing feedback and shadow work allows both individuals and families to build lasting, authentic trust.

🎧 Follow or subscribe to Families Navigating Addiction and Recovery for more conversations about addiction and family recovery.

⭐ Leave a review and share this episode with someone who may benefit from it.

Shiva J is a somatic facilitator, relationship coach, certified Tantra educator, and founder of The Sacred Kings. With nearly three decades of experience across fitness, self-defense, and somatic psychology, he specializes in helping men cultivate grounded integrity, navigate power dynamics, and build safe, accountable spaces in coaching and relationships.

Website: https://thesacredkings.com/

Community:
Join The Sacred Kings Brotherhood or explore their open Facebook community through the main website.

Jeff Jones helps families impacted by addiction understand how addiction affects the entire family system. Through his coaching, masterclass, book, and educational content, he helps families create clearer communication, healthier response patterns, and a different way forward.

If your family is navigating addiction and you're looking for a different way forward, I invite you to schedule a free discovery call with me.

Book a free discovery call: https://www.thefamilyrecoverysolution.com/book-a-call/

This six-session masterclass helps families understand how addiction affects the entire family and move away from confusion, emotional overload, and constant reaction. Families learn how to develop steadier, more intentional responses and create healthier patterns within the family.

Learn more: https://www.thefamilyrecoverysolution.com/masterclass-upgrade/

In Rethinking Addiction: The New Family Recovery Solution, Jeff Jones offers a different way for families to understand addiction by looking at the family system as a whole. The book introduces practical tools, Both/And thinking, clearer communication, and family rules that are stronger than addiction's chaos while maintaining connection with the person you love.

Get the book: https://www.thefamilyrecoverysolution.com/rethinking-addiction-book/

Work with Jeff: https://www.thefamilyrecoverysolution.com/

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/jeff-jones-0303834/

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@thefamilyrecoverysolution

Substack: https://jeffjones.substack.com/

#Integrity #Accountability #PowerDynamics #SomaticHealing #RestorativeJustice #MensWork #RelationshipCoaching #FamilyRecovery #AddictionRecovery #FamilyAddictionSupport

In this episode of Families Navigating Addiction and Recovery, I sit down with licensed psychologist Dr. Julie Shafer, who brings over 20 years of clinical experience specializing in relationship dynamics and people-pleasing.

We explore the significant overlap between people-pleasing behaviors and family addiction, specifically how partners and family members can lose their authentic selves while bending over backwards to maintain connection and avoid conflict.

Dr. Julie breaks down the core differences between passive, aggressive, and assertive communication, explains why trying to manage the other person can create deeper disconnection, and provides a practical, step-by-step framework for setting healthy boundaries without escalating arguments.

🎧 Follow or subscribe to Families Navigating Addiction and Recovery for more conversations about addiction and family recovery.

⭐ Leave a review and share this episode with someone who may benefit from it.

Dr. Julie Shafer is a licensed psychologist with over two decades of experience in private practice, helping adults navigate people-pleasing, relationship conflict, and communication challenges.

Website: https://drjulieshafer.com/

Free Resource:
Visit Dr. Julie's website homepage to download Saying It Right: Your Guide to Confident Communication. The resource includes a one-page PDF summary and a full follow-up Effective Communication Workbook.

Jeff Jones helps families impacted by addiction understand how addiction affects the entire family system. Through his coaching, masterclass, book, and educational content, he helps families create clearer communication, healthier response patterns, and a different way forward.

If your family is navigating addiction and you're looking for a different way forward, I invite you to schedule a free discovery call with me.

Book a free discovery call: https://www.thefamilyrecoverysolution.com/book-a-call/

This six-session masterclass helps families understand how addiction affects the entire family and move away from confusion, emotional overload, and constant reaction. Families learn how to develop steadier, more intentional responses and create healthier patterns within the family.

Learn more: https://www.thefamilyrecoverysolution.com/masterclass-upgrade/

In Rethinking Addiction: The New Family Recovery Solution, Jeff Jones offers a different way for families to understand addiction by looking at the family system as a whole. The book introduces practical tools, Both/And thinking, clearer communication, and family rules that are stronger than addiction's chaos while maintaining connection with the person you love.

Get the book: https://www.thefamilyrecoverysolution.com/rethinking-addiction-book/

Work with Jeff: https://www.thefamilyrecoverysolution.com/

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/jeff-jones-0303834/

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@thefamilyrecoverysolution

Substack: https://jeffjones.substack.com/

#PeoplePleasing #AssertiveCommunication #HealthyBoundaries #RelationshipConflict #FamilyRecovery #AddictionRecovery #FamilyAddictionSupport #CommunicationSkills #CodependencyRecovery #EmotionalHealth