Julie Brumley thought her same-race domestic adoption was trauma-free until mysterious "flashbacks to nothing" began paralyzing her during intimate moments. Despite loving adoptive parents, she carried cellular memories from surviving two abortion attempts and four different caregivers in her first seven weeks of life.

Origins
A professor's blunt warning that unresolved adoption issues would "harm people" sent Julie on a decade-long quest to uncover trauma stored in her nervous system. She reveals how traditional talk therapy missed 80% of the healing work happening in the body.

Recovery
Julie explains her seven-phase somatic approach that transforms people-pleasing and external validation into authentic self-belonging. She demonstrates why adoptee anger typically masks deeper grief and how body-based therapies like EMDR access primal wounds.

Impact
This episode shows that all adoptees carry trauma regardless of circumstances, but healing is absolutely possible when we address where trauma actually lives in the body.

Discover hope and healing for adoption trauma - SUBSCRIBE to Voices of Adoption.\

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In this episode of Voices of Adoption, hosts Donna Pope and Nathan Gwilliam welcome Laurie James, author and somatic relationship coach, who shares her transformation story chronicled in her memoir "Sandwiched" about overcoming a lifetime of feeling like an outsider.

Guarded Hearts

Growing up, Laurie sensed an unexplained distance between herself and her adoptive mother despite clear signs of love. This puzzling dynamic remained a mystery until a car ride conversation with her aging father in her 40s revealed the truth behind her mother's guarded heart.

Double Tragedy

Laurie learned she was the third attempt at bringing a daughter into their home. Her adoptive mother had endured the stillbirth of a baby girl, followed by the heartbreak of losing another adopted daughter when the birth mother changed her mind months later. These devastating losses created a mother too wounded to risk full attachment again.

Ultimate Betrayal

Years later, Laurie's husband secretly searched for and contacted her birth mother despite her clear wishes against reunion. This violation by the person meant to protect her triggered deep abandonment wounds and ultimately contributed to the end of their 26-year marriage.

Medical Pandora

After her divorce, Laurie's health collapsed dramatically. Mysterious symptoms landed her in the hospital twice before a friend introduced her to Somatic Experiencing Therapy. Through this body-based healing approach, she discovered that adoption trauma had been stored in her nervous system for decades and learned practical tools for regulation and recovery.

Transform loneliness into lasting connection. Tune in to discover the process that helped Laurie heal decades of trauma and find her tribe. Don't miss future episodes that could change your adoption journey. Join thousands of "Voices" finding healing, hope, and community through the Voices of Adoption, today and SUBSCRIBE.

Follow or Subscribe to Voices of Adoption on your favorite platform:

Website:

www.VoicesOfAdoption.org

https://www.VoicesOfAdoption.org

YouTube:

@VoicesOf_Adoption

https://www.youtube.com/@VoicesOf_Adoption

Twitter/X:

@voices_adoption

https://x.com/voices_adoption

Instagram:

@voicesof_adoption

https://www.instagram.com/voicesof_adoption/

Facebook:

Voices of Adoption

https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61577208399818

TikTok:

@voices_of_adoption

https://www.tiktok.com/@voices_of_adoption

LinkedIn:

@Voices-of-Adoption

https://www.linkedin.com/company/voices-of-adoption/

Follow Laurie James:

Website: LaurieeJames.com

https://www.laurieejames.com/

LinkedIn: @lauire-james

https://www.linkedin.com/in/laurie-james-8336a0168/

Book: "Sandwiched"

https://www.amazon.com/Sandwiched-Memoir-Holding-Letting-Go/dp/1631527851

Apple Podcast: Confessions of a Freebird ... https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/confessions-of-a-freebird-midlife-divorce-heal/id1694026063

Laurie James' free Guide - "Beginner's Guide to Somatic Healing."

https://laurieejames.myflodesk.com/bgtsh

Listen to Dr. Vivek Murthy's podcast on Loneliness and Connection:

https://brenebrown.com/podcast/dr-vivek-murthy-and-brene-on-loneliness-and-connection/

In episode of Voices of Adoption, Anthony Akerman, the acclaimed South African playwright and author, dives deeper into his adoption journey and the meaning behind his memoir title "Lucky Bastard." Anthony shares the remarkable coincidences that surrounded him long before his adoption reunion - from university classmates to teachers married to his cousins and paths unknowingly crossed with biological relatives throughout his life. He reveals how adoption shaped his relationships, leading to repetitive patterns of abandonment, choosing partners who would abandon him, and how therapy helped him understand his "repetition compulsion." Anthony also explores the literary connections between adoption stories, from Oedipus to Moses, and how storytelling became his path to healing. Despite recent health challenges, Anthony maintains his perspective as a "lucky bastard" - someone who found two families, healing, and happiness after decades of searching for belonging.

When South African playwright Anthony Akerman discovered he was adopted at age 10, his adoption journey took a dramatic turn. For nearly three decades, sealed adoption records kept him from knowing his birth name was actually Peter Farnham or that his birth father was heir to a famous wine dynasty. At 38, Anthony finally gained access to identifying information, leading to an emotional adoption reunion with his birth mother at 40. But their relationship became a rollercoaster of connection and rejection, with his birth mother eventually abandoning him again years later. Anthony's adoption story in his memoir "Lucky Bastard" chronicles how being an adopted child shaped his identity, fueled abandonment issues in relationships, and drove his decades-long search for birth parents. This episode explores why adoptees need origin stories, the complexities of adoption reunions, and how the search for biological family can heal - even when the endings aren't perfect. You'll hear about the moment everything Anthony believed about himself shattered and how that discovery launched an adoption search across continents.

Find out more about Anthony Akerman:

Bio (theatrelives.co.za) - anthony-akerman

LinkedIn - anthony-akerman

Dr. Abigail Hasberry lived two versions of her adoption story: the one her parents told her, and the one she discovered later. As a Black child raised in a white Irish Catholic family, she spent her childhood moving from country to country, watching Black culture through a TV screen she couldn't step into. In this episode of Voices of Adoption, hosts Donna Pope and Nathan Gwilliam sit down with Dr. Hasberry, a therapist specializing in adoption trauma, who reveals why adoptive parents must fall in love with their child's culture before they fall in love with the child, and what happens when they don't. She breaks down the hidden attachment issues that plague nearly every adoptee, explains why traditional therapy often fails transracial adoptees, and shares the breakthrough brain spotting technique that finally helped her process decades of unresolved trauma. This conversation will change how you think about adoption, identity, and what it really means to give a child a home.

International adoptions have collapsed from 21,000 to just 1,200 per year. Over 100,000 children in foster care are waiting for families right now. In this inaugural episode, co-hosts Donna Pope and Nathan Gwilliam expose the harsh realities behind these numbers. Donna has facilitated thousands of adoptions over 26 years and raised three adopted sons, while Nathan founded adoption.com and ran it for decades. Together, they tackle the issues that others avoid discussing - the devastating impact of policy changes, why professionals refuse controversial topics, and the heartbreaking reality of children who simply need families. You'll hear about birth mothers who place children out of pure love, adoptive families navigating complex emotions, and the urgent need for authentic conversations in the adoption community. This episode sets the stage for unfiltered discussions that will change how you think about adoption forever.

Voices of Adoption amplifies authentic stories from across the adoption triad - birth parents, adoptees, and adoptive families - along with adoption service providers. Host Donna Pope, Executive Director of Heart To Heart Adoptions and Clinical Mental Health Counselor and her co-host Nathan Gwilliam, founder & former CEO of Adoption.com, create a safe space for honest conversations about the complexities of adoption. Birth parents share their journeys of love, loss, and healing. Adoptees discuss identity, belonging, and their lived experiences. Adoptive families open up about challenges and beautiful moments. Adoption service providers offer insights from their professional experience supporting families throughout the process. Each episode bridges different perspectives within the adoption community, helping listeners understand that every adoption story is unique yet connected by common threads of resilience and hope. These conversations don't shy away from difficult emotions or complex questions. Instead, they honor the full spectrum of adoption experiences with empathy and respect. Join us for stories that educate, inspire understanding, and remind us that every voice in the adoption community matters.