What if the real source of suffering in your life isn’t your circumstances, but the quiet, constant stream of judgment you’re swimming in – of yourself, of others, of how life “should” be?
In this episode, I’m joined again by Dr. Dain Heer – author, co-creator of Access Consciousness, and someone who has spent decades sitting with people in their most contracted, painful moments and helping them find a way through that oesn’t rely on more fixing or more “work”. We explore a radical but disarmingly simple idea: that freedom begins when everything becomes just an “interesting point of view.” Dain walks us through a live exercise using that phrase – first with something upsetting in my own life, and then in the context of relationships – and you’ll hear, in real time, how quickly the charge, tension and tightness start to dissolve.
From there we open up a much bigger territory: How judgment masquerades as love and caring, especially in families and intimate relationships. Why we’re addicted to controlling other people’s choices – and why it never works. The difference between fear and awareness, and why many of us are actually far less “afraid” than we think. How our stories about who we are and what’s possible quietly run our lives – and what it takes to step beyond them. We also go into the body: illness, “mystery” symptoms, and what might be underneath them. Dain shares some of the questions he uses with clients – including “What are you dying to get out of?” and “What are you sick of?” – and how, when we’re willing to be radically honest, those questions can start to unwind years of stuck energy.
Underneath all of this is a very different definition of consciousness: a space where everything exists and nothing is judged. From that space, vulnerability stops being weakness and becomes real power. The need to be right softens. The nervous system exhales. And life – health, relationship, creativity, money – can be shaped from choice rather than from old, inherited scripts. If you’ve ever felt trapped in your own reactions, exhausted by your inner critic, or confused about why you keep recreating the same patterns, this conversation is an invitation to try another way. Not as a belief system, but as a set of tools you can test in the trenches of your actual life.
I hope you feel the same thing I did speaking with Dain: a sense that there is far more freedom available, right here, than we’ve been taught to expect.
About Dain:
Dr. Dain Heer is a seeker, speaker, and energetic facilitator who has spent the last two decades inviting people to explore what else is possible—beyond judgment, beyond limitation, and beyond the boxes we’ve been told to live in.
He is the author of Being You, Changing the World and the founder of International Being You Day, a global celebration of uniqueness, joy, and choice. Through his work, Dain offers practical tools for transformation and a space for people to remember the gift they truly are.
He is also the co-creator of Access Consciousness®️, a global personal development movement practiced in 176 countries. A visionary in conscious leadership, Dain is known for leading with kindness, inclusivity, and the unwavering belief that true leadership is about empowering others to rise. drdainheer.com.
Feelings with Strangers
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1 Std. und 10 Min.