Ellen has spent decades studying what happens when we stop moving through life on autopilot. When we stop treating our assumptions like facts. When we replace certainty with a simple act: noticing. In this episode, we talk about mindfulness without meditation—her version of mindfulness that doesn’t require silence or a retreat. Just attention. Just the willingness to admit: I don’t know.

We move through her iconic experiments - like turning back the clock on ageing, or rigging clocks to show how perceived time changes what happens in the body. We talk about why stress isn’t caused by events, but by the meaning we attach to them. And why so much of what we call reality is really just… a story we’re clinging to because it makes us feel safe.

That the body doesn’t just respond to biology — it responds to meaning. To perception. To the story we’re living inside.

Ellen's work is quietly radical. Her work time and again shows that we have far more influence over our biology than we’ve been taught. Not through force. Not through positive thinking as a performance. But through attention. Through flexibility. Through refusing to collapse life into single answers and embracing the constant change.

Ellen J. Langer

Ellen J. Langer is a professor of psychology at Harvard University and a pioneering researcher best known for developing a Western, evidence-based approach to mindfulness without meditation—often described as “the simple act of noticing new things.” She is widely recognised for decades of research on mindlessness, decision-making, ageing, health, and what she calls mind–body unity. Her work has earned major honours, including multiple Distinguished Scientist Awards and the Liberty Science Center “Genius” Award, and she has been repeatedly named one of Harvard’s favourite professors by students. Her recent books include The Mindful Body: Thinking Our Way to Chronic Health (released in 2023) and Finding Happy, an illustrated book exploring everyday mindfulness and wellbeing. She shares more of her work at her website.

Feelings with Strangers

Socials

https://www.instagram.com/feelings.with.strangers/

Youtube

https://youtu.be/kmDja4q83i8?si=xIl7TbBrdeCEk5dh

Ellen J. Langer

Site

https://www.ellenlanger.me/

Books

https://www.ellenlanger.me/home#book-s

Socials

https://www.instagram.com/ellenjlanger/

https://x.com/ellenjl

What happens when the cultural story of “we’re all the same” collides with biology?

World-renowned relationship expert John Grey explores what has changed, and what hasn’t, since Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus reshaped the conversation on modern relationships.

Together, they move beyond slogans and into the deeper architecture of connection: hormones, polarity, evolutionary biology, childhood imprinting, stress, sexuality, and the subtle misunderstandings that quietly erode intimacy over time.

John argues that much of today’s relational suffering isn’t because men and women are broken - but because we’ve lost fluency in our differences. As women have become more independent and men increasingly uncertain of their role, the hormonal and psychological dance between masculine and feminine energy has shifted. Stress rises. Attraction fades. Communication collapses.

But beneath the tension, he suggests, there is a blueprint.

We discuss

• Why misunderstanding differences creates resentment

• How stress hormones affect empathy and emotional connection

• Why “talking it out” can sometimes make things worse

• The role of polarity in sustaining sexual attraction

• How childhood wounds shape adult relationships

• Why happiness in one partner affects the other biologically

• The subtle ways modern culture may be weakening both men and women

• And what it really means to support - rather than compete with - one another

The conversation also moves into deeper territory: forgiveness of the father, repeating ancestral patterns, the biology of bonding, the role of space in love, and even the spiritual dimension of intimacy through Taoist and tantric traditions.

This is not a nostalgic call to return to the past. It’s an invitation to move forward with greater awareness of how we’re wired - and how that wiring can either divide us or bring us closer.

John Gray, Ph.D. is one of the world’s most recognised relationship experts and the author of the international bestseller Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus, which has sold over 50 million copies worldwide and been translated into more than 40 languages.

For over four decades, he has counselled individuals and couples, integrating insights from psychology, biology, spirituality and Eastern traditions. A former celibate monk and long-time meditator, Gray combines practical relationship tools with a broader understanding of consciousness and hormonal health.

His recent work explores how modern cultural shifts have altered male–female dynamics and what couples can do to restore polarity, emotional safety, and lasting attraction.

John's new book out now - "Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus – For Women Only: Be Happy With or Without a Man"

Feelings with Strangers

Socials

https://www.instagram.com/feelings.with.strangers/

Youtube

https://youtu.be/kmDja4q83i8?si=xIl7TbBrdeCEk5dh

John Gray

Site

https://www.marsvenus.com/john-gray

Socials

https://www.instagram.com/johngraymarsvenus_official/?hl=en

YouTube

https://www.youtube.com/@JohnGrayMarsVenus

Lynne McTaggart is an investigative journalist-turned-consciousness researcher whose work lives right on that edge where science, healing, and the mystery of being human start to overlap.

Lynne is best known for The Field, and The Intention Experiment - and for taking a question most feel: What if thoughts and intention don’t stay inside us? What if they have influence and reach we can only begin to imagine? In this conversation, we get practical and specific. Lynne breaks down what “intention” actually is (and what it isn’t), why language matters, why groups consistently amplify outcomes, and how the Power of Eight approach became a kind of global laboratory - not in theory, but in real experiments, with measurable results.

This conversation is an invitation to consider that the world is more connected than we’ve been trained to believe - and that there is a disciplined, repeatable way to work with that connection to radically change your life.

Lynne McTaggart

An award-winning journalist, author, and researcher known internationally for her work on consciousness, healing, and the science of intention. She is the author of The Field, The Intention Experiment, The Bond, and The Power of Eight, and she co-founded What Doctors Don’t Tell You, which began as a newsletter in 1989 and grew into an international health publication. Lynne also teaches the Intention Masterclass, a year-long program focused on her “13 Keys to Intention Mastery” and the Power of Eight® group method. The 2026 lesson plan lists the first live session as Saturday, February 28, 2026.

Feelings with Strangers

Socials

https://www.instagram.com/feelings.with.strangers/

Youtube

https://youtu.be/kmDja4q83i8?si=xIl7TbBrdeCEk5dh

Lynne McTaggart

Website https://lynnemctaggart.com/ Intention

Masterclass https://lynnemctaggart.com/courses/intention-masterclass/

What Doctors Don’t Tell You https://www.wddty.com/about-us/

Socials

https://www.instagram.com/lynnemctaggartofficial/?hl=en

YouTube

https://www.youtube.com/ ⁨@lynnemctaggart4255⁩