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Every Mother Matters With Sharon Ow

Every Mother Matters With Sharon Ow

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 Every Mother Matters With Sharon OwSoul Rich Woman Beziehungen Elternschaft & Familienleben
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  • 13: My baby number 3

    13: My baby number 3
    Feb 20 2021
    Transcript for Ep13:Welcome to Every Mother Matters. I’m Sharon and in this episode, I will be sharing with you my thoughts on baby #3After my 2nd birth, Baby #3 is always in my mind. However, it was always on hold because my purpose then was to reach out to the new mothers. To achieve that, I attended pre and postnatal massage courses because it was the easiest way to achieve my aim. It was at that point in time that I really made a decision to totally give up accountancy and not to go back to an office job. For the past 10 years, I attended many courses while doing mummy baby work.Friends told me “Sharon, you have enough training.” and they did not understand why I was always taking courses. But I felt that there were some doubts inside me that kept me searching for an answer. It was part of my postnatal recovery and healing to know what I needed to know to overcome and accept the past. My postnatal was the toughest and I was in search of an answer.My husband scolded me TRASH and said that I did not know how to take care of our baby. I felt misunderstood, depressed and angry. Mother knows best. I truthfully agree. But how can a mother know best when there is so much separation of mother n baby from day 1 after the baby is born and especially if everyone is out of a sudden so crazy over the newborn baby and wanted to carry the baby instead of letting the mother and the baby together. In my newborn preparation course, I always explain by quoting simple examples for parents to understand. How can 2 people get to know each other better?Ok, so, you like someone and at first you need to find excuses to meet the person. Say, oh I passed by here, just drop by to say hi to you. “How are you? Have you eaten?” “ok, bye, see you.”Then both of you meet more regularly, say weekly then daily until both of you decide to get married to live together and share the same room and same bed.It is the physical presence that a person can get to know another person. So how can we expect a new mother to know best if the baby is sleeping alone in a separate and dark room by himself. In the first place, do you feel safe sleeping alone in a dark room? Then, we expect a new mother to know best when a newborn baby sleeps long and deep in a dark room alone.While a mother knows best, the mother's recovery after childbirth is important. Is her wishes acknowledged and respected? Does she feel nurtured and supported?My postnatal recovery took me years. I also did overnight newborn baby care for new mummies who needed extra help. After gaining experiences with babies, I further my training in postnatal care for mummy and physiologic baby care. Many of my doubts in postnatal health of women and baby behaviours were all answered in these courses. The training was very in depth and detailed. By this time, I have confident that I know how to take care of myself and my newborn baby if I have baby #3. It feels very different this time round. I know what to expect for a newborn baby who requires a 24 hours round the clock care. I know exactly what to do and how to do things right this time. I am full of baby energy and hoping for baby #3 whenever my old or new clients or friends tell me that they are pregnant. I am more than ready for another baby now.I went to a fortune teller, just a few steps away from my shop for some insight. When he first looked at my birth year, he said that to increase the chances of conceiving was to do IVF and easier to opt for cesarean. That was not my option at all. He is famous, very experienced, fast and accurate in his interpretation. The consultation was S$18. Then he said that based on my bazi, which is my birth date and time, these 2 years are not favourable for me to conceive. Later he added that I can try to have baby #3 because based on my bazhi calculation, I have 3 kids. He also asked if I ever had miscarriage before. Many years back, I went to another fortune teller and he said I have 3 kids. I will have a son before age 40 and after the age of 40, I will have daughters. Things change slightly now and I believe we control our own destiny. Now the new fortune teller told me that I will have 2 boys and 1 girl and my kids are smart kids. I already have a son and a daughter. I think my daughter is smart but I am yet to see the potential of my son. I am not sure if he is smart but perhaps time will tell. My husband did not believe in fortune telling. Before we got married, I suggested that we match our birth dates to see if we were compatible but he did not want to do it. So, I did not tell them about the fact that I went to a fortune teller regarding baby #3.My husband is 7 years my senior. Initially when I said I feel very lonely and alone sometimes and wished to have baby #3, he objected because of our age concern.I told him that if I am really pregnant, then we can say that it is an accident, unplanned pregnancy ...
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    13 Min.
  • 12: How Moxibustion leads me to open a physical shop

    12: How Moxibustion leads me to open a physical shop
    Feb 13 2021
    Transcript for Ep12: Welcome to Every Mother Matters. I’m Sharon and in this episode, I will be sharing with you how Moxibustion leads me to open a physical shopRest and warm after childbirth are the keys to good health. My body was cold, I had wind in my body, I had lower backache so I thought moxibustion warm therapy would be suitable for me. Four years after the birth of my 2nd baby, I asked my moxibustion trainer to recommend me a suitable spa where I could get the best price as I wanted to do it as long-term maintenance to strengthen my body. The female therapist was my moxibustion course mate. I only realised it when I saw an old photo taken some time back at the moxibustion training school. She was just sitting behind me in the photo. She is from China but she can type in English when I texted her so it is easy for me.It was by chance that I got to learn about moxibustion while waiting for a friend outside her shop. I was earlier and I was looking around. The moxi training school was 3 shops away. After completing the course, I knew I needed to do moxi and at that time, I signed the basic 3 months wellness plan. Each session was about 2 hours but there were 2 therapists who attended to me at the same time. I did a lot of body parts including facial moxibustion as well. I knew that my body needed more sessions. So finally, 2 years later, I went to the spa my moxi trainer recommended.I religiously followed the wellness plan because I truly knew how it worked. Initially, it was very intent. There are 12 sets of products for various parts like kidney, digestion, liver, ovary. I did a lot of parts including facial and breast moxibustion as well. After childbirth, my skin was very dry, especially around my eyes area, there were wrinkles so I also did facial moxibustion to improve my skin elasticity and my dull skin.I did breast moxibustion to prevent sagging breast, improve the lymph and blood circulation. Doing breast moxi and to clear residual milk even years after I stopped breastfeeding were still necessary for a woman’s breast health. After I stopped breastfeeding, my breasts were smaller but after the breast moxi with the improved circulation which brings nutrients to the breast, my therapist also noticed that my breast size was bigger. Since then, I noticed that my breasts are firmer too. I was really serious about doing moxibustion to improve my health. The warmth from burning the mugwort herb, which is the pure yang herb is very powerful. The warmth helped to clear my meridian pathway to expel coldness, wind and dampness from my body. I signed up for many sessions. Moxibstion warm therapy is not cheap as with all other natural alternative therapies but it was money well spent.My memory index was so low that I was afraid that I might have dementia when I get older. So I did head moxi for early prevention. The therapist held the burning moxi stick at least 3 cm over the acupuncture points above my skin. I felt a sense of very deep relaxation because warmth felt very comfortable over my cold body. I tried my best to go for the session 3x in the first week before I continue to maintain at 2x per week. My body was warmed up when I followed the wellness plan. Very soon within the first few sessions in the first week, moxi warm helped me to expel coldness from my body and I started to feel that my soles of the feet were ice cold during every session. It took me half a year to expel coldness and after that I no longer feel that my feet were cold. The therapist covered me with layers and layers of towels for half a year. She was sweating away during my moxi session because I asked her to switch off the air-con which was too cold for me at that time. After my session, the warm continued to circulate in my body and I got to wear a sweater after the session.This China lady is a few months younger than me. Many times, during my moxi therapy sessions, I told her that I wished to have a physical shop next time because I always hoped to teach group newborn preparation course and also provide moxibustion therapy.One day, the female therapist informed me that the rental lease was expiring soon and she was moving out. She asked me to consider if I were keen to takeover the unit. It was not ready to have a physical shop then because I did not know much about how to manage a business if I had a shop. To encourage me to takeover the shop unit, she came out with a lot of white lies. She told me that her fee would be higher in the new location and she would not be able to bring her old existing clients over to her new location. She told me not to change the shop too much so that her clients could recognize the shop. She wanted to test my moxibustion techniques on her so that it was easier to recommend me to her client.So, she would pass the old existing clients to me when I took over the unit. At the end, she only had one client with a...
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    13 Min.
  • 11: Why I prefer to have a physical shop instead of doing home visits.

    11: Why I prefer to have a physical shop instead of doing home visits.
    Feb 6 2021
    Transcript for Ep11:Welcome to Every Mother Matters. I’m Sharon and in this episode, I will be sharing with you why I prefer to have a physical shop instead of doing home visits.Many mummies do not understand why I want to have a shop to pay rental instead of continuing to do home visit services. Some of my clients are business owners themselves and have a physical shop but they also asked me the same question because it is more popular to do home visits for my services.I had a lot of training in body massage. However, I never see myself as a masseuse. My purpose was to reach out to the new mothers and the easiest way was to do pre and postnatal massage with belly wrapping. I received many nice reviews from clients on my massage too. I had clients who trusted and loved me so much that they felt so comfortable with me that they wanted me to massage them during their labour in the hospital. I had prenatal clients who needed the prenatal massage during pregnancy because it was difficult for them to sleep well with the growing fetus inside them. Normally, they would pay me first and after the massage, when my client dozed off, I would cover them with a blanket, switch off the light and quietly leave the room. I could spend 7 hours travelling and doing 5 hours of work. I remembered one day, there was a sudden downpour of rain but I needed to walk to my client's house and when I reached there, my pants were all wet. After the prenatal massage, my pants were dried. When I walked out, it rained again. I was very hard working then. Sometimes, I reached home past midnight. It was a very rewarding and fulfilling experience.I personally did not go for body massage. My first massage was postnatal massage with belly wrapping after childbirth. Even those who don't like to do massage know about postnatal massage and will find masseuse to come to the house to do it. There is high demand for home visit pre and postnatal massage. For home visit massage, many want it cheap and good. So, it is very easy for me to turn away clients. I once had clients who kept asking about promotion and 1st trial when I was doing home visit services. When I checked her address on “how to go” aps, I realised that the place was at Sentosa. It is very time consuming and more costly to go to Sentosa because it is far. I had another client asking for promotion and when the taxi driver asked me was the address at a condo or normal HDB flat. I said HDB. We could not find the block number. To my surprise, my client who was asking for promotion was living in a condo with 2 maids. When I just had a shop, one prenatal client asked me about home visit postnatal massage after childbirth. I did not want to quote her because she wanted to compare prices. I just turned her down. I did not want to get into the business of engaging home visit masseuse and also the coordinating work. So, right from the start when I have a shop, I did not employ masseuse under my business.I still do home visit services for lactation breast massage and moxibustion warm therapy. Only in rare situations that I do pre and postnatal massage for clients in the comfort of their homes. My focus is no longer on massage. With a physical shop, I want to fulfil my dream to teach group newborn preparation course and I also specialised in doing moxibustion warm therapy.I always felt the need to “get out” and could not station in one place for long. Home visits used to work out very well for me. After doing various alternative therapies over the years, it was a breakthrough that I had the thought of settling down and stationed in a place to have a physical shop. Now, I enjoyed being alone in my shop. I love the peace and my personal space. My previous shop at bugis cube was at level 3 where there was a window at the back where the sunlight shined in. It felt so warm and comfortable. After 2 years when the contact ended, I moved to City Gate basement 1 where it is really enclosed. It was really a breakthrough! I feel very comfortable and I no longer feel the need to “get out”. I make it a point that I will only consider doing home visit when my client trusts me and knows me long enough. If not, I have heartache when I can understand a baby cry and when I tell my client what to do based on the cry, my client does not trust me and I can’t do anything for the baby. Sometimes, clients trust their confinement nannies more.It is much easier for me when my client trusts me. I visited my client for postnatal massage and moxibustion warm therapy for her husband. Every time I went to her house, I heard one of the twins crying the need to-be-burp cry. I suggested that the nanny burp the baby. She did not take my word seriously. She carried the baby in the upright position without burping and after a while she put the baby down. The discomfort was still there and soon the baby cried the same cry again.Then ...
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    13 Min.
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