Ergebnis für "Stoner" in Humor

The first wave of Players has arrived! After securing a tiny slice of dwarf heaven on a mountain in the woods, Brandt and his new friends would like nothing more than to be left in peace to smelt, forge, and sell. Unfortunately for them, the world around them has no such inclination.

The Dragon King is looking for a wife. The news causes a frenzy for the women in my village. The king will be sending out the royal guard to bring women of childbearing age to his castle in Jade City. There is only one requirement: his wife-to-be must carry enough magic to produce an heir for him. I know I won’t be chosen: I’m only human with a mere ten percent dragon magic lineage, but for some reason the magic sniffers command me to present myself to the king as a possible wife.

After conquering dungeons and finally getting some leverage over the gods ganging up on him, Mukohda sets his sights on the domestic life. With his new palatial manor fully staffed with trustworthy servants and guards, it seems like as good a time as any to focus on building up his...

I never should have taken that loan but my aunt needed meds I couldn’t afford. Now I’ve been sold to slavery and the Nightfall Queen’s guards have found out I’m not entirely human. I guess I’m lucky they didn’t kill me. The next thing I hear is that the Elf King himself has bought me, and I’m to be transferred to his castle. It will take me five years to pay off the debt but I get to be his personal assistant. Personal assistant to the king. That can’t be so bad, right? Oh how wrong I was.

Der Trial geht weiter und wer hinter dem endlosen Blutvergießen steht, ist immer noch ein Rätsel. Es spielt keine Rolle, ob du einer Kaste angehörst und Privilegien genießt oder ein vogelfreies Stück Fleisch bist, ein berühmt-berüchtigter Top Star, dessen Foto alle Welt kommentiert, oder der letzte Loser – niemand hat eine Ahnung, und mit jeder Erkenntnis tun sich nur neue Fragen auf. Vor dem Start auf der neuen Ebene hast du eine Wahl. Je härter die Gangart, die du wählst, desto schöner die Preise, die dir winken.

Axil Moon broke my heart when I was fifteen and I’ve dreamed of getting revenge ever since. So when he becomes the king of all Wolven and summons me to compete for his hand in marriage in the deadly Queen Trials, I gladly accept. I want nothing more than to defeat the competition and leave him cold and alone when I slam the bedroom door in his face every night. Axil Moon will regret the day he thought he could discard me and get away with it.

Dan Shamble, zombie P. I. He’s a stiff detective, and he’s got stones! The cases don’t solve themselves in the Unnatural Quarter, filled with ghosts, vampires, mummies, werewolves, and other mythical creatures. It takes an intrepid zombie detective to decipher mysteries, unravel conspiracies, track down cursed objects, and find time for a beer with his Best Human Friend at the Goblin Tavern. Dan Shamble, zombie P. I.

Lucien Thorne is the most vile monster in all of Thorngate. As Winter King, he rules our land with an iron fist and a cold, dead heart. And my father has just informed me that I am betrothed to marry him. As the Princess of Fall, it is my duty to marry whatever suitor my father chooses for me, but even duty can’t make me spend the rest of my life with someone like Lucien. However the more time I spend with this mysterious man, the more I wonder if the rumours about him are even true.

The Summer Court princess has never failed to end the curse that ravages Faerie every hundred years, until now. The responsibility has fallen on the Fall princess, Aribella, to stop the poison destroying her realm: she must go to Ethereum to fetch the heart of one of its dark lords, or her people will perish.

With the curse threatening to destroy not only Faerie, but Ethereum as well, the last princess of Faerie must work with one of the dark Ethereum lords to end the curse once and for all. . . or die trying.

The Winter Court princess must find the next piece of the puzzle to end the curse ravaging her lands.

My mission is clear: travel to Faerie and help Lorelei destroy the curse that has plagued our worlds for centuries. But Faerie is no fairytale. The moment I arrive, everything unravels. Lorelei is imprisoned by a mad queen, and the land itself is a nightmare of decay and danger. I must fight through this cursed realm to reach her, knowing time is against us. If I fail, I’ll lose her before I even have the chance to love her.

The story continues, following the events of its predecessor. In the anime world, Satovia, Clyde still battles the anime tropes, but no longer dances at the fingertips of the watchers. However, his friends have real issues, problems that intertwine with his own mission. Casting away selfishness, he finds himself awakening his real power.

An inter-connected romantasy perfect for fans of Sarah J. Maas To save my kingdom, someone must die… Every hundred years, a curse descends on Faerie. For the last two millennia, the Summer Court princess has ended it. She has travelled to the mirror realm, found an Ethereum Lord, and returned...

The Stone Door is an omen, an incantation, and an adventure story rolled into one. Built in layers like a puzzle box, it is the tale of two people, of love and the Zodiac and the Kabbalah, of Transylvania and Mesopotamia converging at the Caucasus, of a mad Hungarian King named Böles Kilary and of a woman's discovery of an initiatory code that leads to a Cyclopean obstacle, to love, self and awareness, to the great stone door of Kescke and beyond.

Will Stone Ovaries betray her principles and compliment Pizzazzster's sparkly leggings? Will Kevin make it to The Spice Hall in Mindmushina Mall to get that bottle of Five Pepper Impalement hot sauce? And what about the bird that Stone Ovaries inadvertently let into the retail monolith? Be prepared to navigate a minefield of immaturity filled with bodily expulsions, princesses, deranged mothers, malapropisms, and guacamole.

A cast-off jester. A lamentable bit of larceny. When a fool is labeled a hero, will his contrary streak save his skin or be fatally side-splitting? Malfred Murd just got downsized. Banished from his cushy life on the royal family’s private island, the talented yet belligerent joker relies on a bit of pickpocketing help from his incurably optimistic magpie sidekick to stave off starvation. But when he tries to turn in a stolen messenger bag for a reward, its desperate owner demands he assist her in rescuing her country…or face execution.

The journey started! What can you expect in this episode? Well...a hilarious road trip, vicious training, the introduction of certain maidens, and even a guest from the Infinite Library.... The team however faces quite the pain-in-the-ass obstacles. The attacks on them aside, it is time to take on a being who has harassed the party since volume 3.

Now that the entire town knows who Clara is unofficially related to, she's even more of a social pariah than before. To make matters worse, the spell keeping the town guarded and safe is failing. Naturally, it's her fault. But that's not all. One of the mysterious strangers Clara met before has revealed his heritage and made it very clear he doesn't want her around. And not in the get out of town way. More in the permanently neutralized sort of way.