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This episode is about turning 39, patterns of self sabotage, and the stories we can't see.

It does touch on mental health and pregnancy loss, and if you need support you can reach out to:

Lifeline 13 11 14
Amber NT (08) 8948 5311
SANDS Australia/Red Nose 1300 308 307

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Adam Drake, Founder of Balanced Choice, theatre kid turned youth worker, on the kids who loved him before he liked himself, the goodness detector, and why the work happens in winter, not spring.

24/7 Crisis Support

• Lifeline: 13 11 14 (Phone), 0477 13 11 14 (Text), or online chat.
• Beyond Blue: 1300 22 4636 or online chat (support for anxiety, depression, and suicide prevention)

For information on the Conference: https://www.balancedchoice.org/events

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TW: This episode contains discussion of suicide and mental health. If you're struggling, please reach out to Lifeline on 13 11 14 or visit lifeline.org.au

Hannah Illingworth has spent her life connecting people to creativity, as Director of Darwin Fringe Festival and the force behind community spaces like Babes that Paint and Queens of the Amp. Like so many of us, her path there was anything but straight.

Expelled from school, grieving a best friend lost to suicide at thirteen, and navigating the systems around her, Hannah found her footing through art, community, and an instinct to just keep trying things.

In this conversation, she talks about building an identity through chaos, the cost of loving your work so much it swallows you whole, and why real and honest anger might be the most underrated source of power we have.

Joy, she says, is resistance. This episode is about what that actually means.

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You know that thing you've been putting off? Do it. Not because it's the most important thing on your list, but because it's taking up space it doesn't deserve.

Lauren talks mental load, transitions, and the small act that cuts through the fog.

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"This is your life, and it’s your choice.
You can make the most of your life and your choices, so go for it."

Vicki Aitken knows what it's like to create spaces for those who need support, and to be heard.

From sports psychology and writing books about golf, to being ordained, Vicki chats to us about a life of faith, love, and St Andrews golf course.

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What narratives are attached to you before you even speak?

In this solo episode, I reflect on language, respect and the experience of public life. The stories others write about you, the pressure to edit yourself and the cost of carrying projections that were never yours to begin with.

It's about the broader idea of what constitutes 'robust debate' and how it is used as a way to justify language and actions aimed at diminishing the voice of others.

I also explore the aftermath of leadership, and the complexity of stepping out of a role while the narrative follows you into every room.

It's about politics, but also about identity. About how we see each other, and the kind of culture we are building with the words we choose.

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Content note:

This episode comes from a much longer conversation and has been carefully edited for clarity, care, and listening ease.

This episode includes discussion of suicidal ideation, drug use, and HIV, shared within a legal and cultural context very different to today. It is presented without judgement or endorsement, but with compassion and care for the things in life that make us who we are.

Listener discretion is advised.

If this episode brings anything up for you, support is available.

• Australia: Lifeline 13 11 14 or lifeline.org.au
• Outside Australia: Visit findahelpline.com to access free, confidential crisis and support services in your country
• If you are in immediate danger, please contact your local emergency number

Thank you for listening, and for the care you bring with you into these rooms.

It explores what it means to live loudly while carrying parts of yourself in silence. Crossroads. Timing. The rooms, literal and emotional, where connection can arrive at exactly the moment it is needed most.

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Is imposter syndrome really an internal problem, or is it sometimes a response to the environment you are in?

Today I explore how context, feedback, and power dynamics feed self doubt, how to take what is useful without swallowing the story, and how to trust yourself without tipping into self delusion.

Join me for a grounded look at sorting through the bullshit, and tell me what you think.