Hey, What's Up! It's Tommy.

Thank you for spending a little time with me today. This episode is a personal reflection on parenting, mental health, autism, faith, and the lessons I've learned over the last 11 years raising my son Wyatt.

When I started Spectrum in Camouflage, my goal was simple. I wanted to spread autism awareness and support families who were walking a similar path. I never imagined the podcast would continue growing into a place where parents, caregivers, and families could find encouragement, connection, and hope.

In this episode, I open up about how the show has evolved and why my focus has shifted beyond autism alone. While I will never stop searching for answers and opportunities to help Wyatt thrive, I have realized that supporting the mental and emotional health of parents is just as important.

I share my perspective on mental health, the role that nutrition, hydration, movement, faith, and relationships have played in my own recovery from anxiety and panic attacks, and why I believe we must actively strengthen our minds just as we strengthen our bodies.

I also reflect on Wyatt's recent birthday and how changing my expectations allowed me to experience one of the most meaningful celebrations we've ever shared. Through that experience, I was reminded that joy often looks different than we imagined, and that's okay.

Most importantly, I share five lessons I wish I could have told myself ten years ago when this journey first began. These lessons have shaped me as a father, husband, and advocate, and I hope they encourage you wherever you are in your own journey.

• Time moves much faster than you expect as a parent.
• You do not have to be a perfect parent.
• Your relationship with your spouse or partner deserves constant attention.
• Small everyday moments often become the most meaningful memories.
• Children are always watching and learning from us.
• Mental health requires ongoing attention, just like physical health.
• Personal growth often comes through uncomfortable experiences.
• Gratitude can exist alongside struggle.
• Consistency and patience are powerful tools for families navigating autism.
• Acceptance does not mean giving up hope.
• Faith, community, and honest conversations can help carry us through difficult seasons.
• Parents should never feel alone in their journey.

Thank you for listening and being part of this community. If this episode encouraged you, please share it with another parent, caregiver, teacher, or family member who may need support today.

Please subscribe, follow, and leave a review wherever you listen to podcasts. Your ratings and reviews help more families discover the show and find encouragement during difficult seasons.

Visit spectrumincamouflage.com for all episodes, resources, and updates.

• Website: spectrumincamouflage.com
• Email: tommy@spectrumincamouflage.com
• Instagram: Follow Spectrum in Camouflage for autism parenting insights, mental health support, and encouragement for families navigating life's challenges.

• We’re on TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@spectrum_in_camouflage
• Join our Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/4002769846662357
• See us on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/spectrum_in_camouflage/

Together, we can create a community to support autistic kids and their families.

If you have questions or ideas or want to share your journey, email me at tommy@spectrumincamouflage.com.

Let’s learn, grow, and make a difference, one step, one piece of the puzzle, one child at a time.

Hey, What's Up! It's Tommy.

Life can feel overwhelming when you're raising a child with autism, caring for a loved one through illness, or simply trying to make it through another difficult day. In this episode, I sit down with my friend Zach Ponder for a deeply personal conversation about mindset, faith, anxiety, gratitude, and the challenges that come with caregiving.

We talk openly about profound autism, cancer, fear, healing, burnout, parenting, and what it means to keep showing up when life doesn't go according to plan. Neither of us claim to have all the answers. We're simply sharing what has helped us continue moving forward when things felt impossible.

One of the biggest themes in this conversation is that hard times are part of life. The goal isn't to avoid them. The goal is learning how to respond to them. We discuss practical mindset shifts, faith-based encouragement, gratitude practices, and the importance of surrounding yourself with people who will support and challenge you when you need it most.

If you're feeling exhausted, discouraged, anxious, or alone, this episode is for you. We hope it reminds you that your story matters, your struggles have purpose, and there is still good to be found even during life's most difficult seasons. :contentReference[oaicite:0]{index=0}

• Anxiety often loses its power when we take meaningful action.
• Gratitude can create a powerful shift in perspective, even during difficult circumstances.
• Faith doesn't always remove hardship, but it can provide strength to walk through it.
• Parents and caregivers need support systems and trusted people they can talk to openly.
• It's important to look for small victories and everyday miracles.
• Growth often comes through challenges, not comfort.
• Isolation and comfort can become obstacles to personal growth and healing.
• Mindset is a daily choice, not a destination.
• Children are always watching and learning from how we respond to adversity.
• There is no perfect life waiting ahead. There is only life, and we have the opportunity to live it fully.

If this episode encouraged you, please share it with another parent, caregiver, or family member who may need some hope today. Every share helps us reach someone who may be struggling and reminds them they are not alone.

For more episodes, resources, and encouragement, visit spectrumincamouflage.com.

If you'd like to connect, share your story, or suggest a future topic, email me at tommy@spectrumincamouflage.com.

• We’re on TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@spectrum_in_camouflage
• Join our Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/4002769846662357
• See us on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/spectrum_in_camouflage/

Together, we can create a community to support autistic kids and their families.

If you have questions or ideas or want to share your journey, email me at tommy@spectrumincamouflage.com.

Let’s learn, grow, and make a difference, one step, one piece of the puzzle, one child at a time.

Hey, What’s Up! It’s Tommy.

I sat down with Josh Stively from 1st Phorm, and what started as a conversation about health and mindset quickly turned into a deep discussion about purpose, burnout, fatherhood, anxiety, faith, community, and the reality caregivers face every single day.

If you are raising a child with autism or profound needs, this episode is for you.

If you feel exhausted, isolated, overwhelmed, or like your own health has fallen to the bottom of the list, this episode is for you too.

Josh shared his own journey from years of smoking, feeling stuck, and knowing he was capable of more, to rebuilding his life through accountability, discipline, and community. We talked about how improving one area of your life can start raising the standard everywhere else.

One thing that really stood out in this conversation is the idea that caregivers often give everything they have to everyone else while completely neglecting themselves. Josh said something powerful:

“You cannot give what you do not have.”

That hit hard.

We talked about why taking care of yourself is not selfish. It is necessary. Your physical health, mental health, sleep, movement, mindset, and emotional well-being directly affect how you show up for the people you love.

This episode also dives into how community changes everything. So many dads isolate. So many caregivers suffer silently. We talked openly about anxiety, depression, suicide, burnout, purpose, and the danger of carrying everything alone.

There was also a huge focus on mindset and the words we speak over ourselves. Josh broke down how our thoughts shape our actions, our energy, and ultimately the direction of our lives. We discussed gratitude, intentionality, perspective, and the importance of taking even the smallest step forward.

You do not need a perfect plan. You do not need hours every day. You just need to start.

Five minutes matters. A walk matters. Breathing matters. Hydration matters. Connection matters. Hope matters.

Most importantly, you matter.

• Caregivers cannot continue pouring from an empty cup.
• Small daily habits can completely change your future.
• Standards should become your minimum, not your goal.
• Accountability and community create momentum.
• Mental health struggles do not make you weak.
• Dads need safe places to have honest conversations.
• Your words and mindset shape your direction in life.
• Taking care of yourself helps you take better care of your family.
• Gratitude changes perspective during difficult seasons.
• Autism families need support, encouragement, and connection.
• Your child’s life still carries incredible beauty and purpose.
• Progress happens one step at a time.

Josh Stively on Instagram: @joshstively

If this episode encouraged you, share it with another caregiver, dad, parent, or friend who may need this reminder today.

You are not alone.

Visit spectrumincamouflage.com for more episodes, encouragement, and resources.

If you want to connect or share your story, email me at tommy@spectrumincamouflage.com

• We’re on TikTok
• Join our Facebook Group
• See us on Instagram

Together, we can create a community to support autistic kids and their families.

If you have questions or ideas or want to share your journey, email me at tommy@spectrumincamouflage.com.

Let’s learn, grow, and make a difference, one step, one piece of the puzzle, one child at a time.

Hey, What’s Up! It’s Tommy.

I sat down with Coach Steve Krebs to talk honestly about anxiety, mental health, stress, and what it actually looks like to take care of yourself when life feels overwhelming. If you’re raising a child with autism, caring for someone with special needs, or simply carrying more pressure than people realize, this conversation is for you.

We talked about the fear of the unknown and how anxiety pulls us out of reality and into future scenarios that may never happen. Steve shared practical things that helped him personally overcome severe anxiety after struggling with it himself for years. This wasn’t some polished “guru” conversation. It was real, direct, and focused on small actions that can create massive change over time.

One of the biggest takeaways from this episode was the reminder that if we are not healthy ourselves, it becomes nearly impossible to fully care for the people we love. That includes physical health, sleep, movement, self-talk, and learning how to stay grounded in the present moment instead of living twenty years ahead in our minds.

We also talked about doom scrolling, phone addiction, alcohol, sleep deprivation, overthinking, meditation, walking, journaling, breathing exercises, and the pressure parents place on themselves every single day.

This episode is not about being perfect. It’s about feeling better more of the time.

• Anxiety is often rooted in fear of the unknown
• Action alleviates anxiety
• Mental health always has a physical component
• Walking daily and consistent movement can dramatically improve mental health
• Sleep quality matters, even if life makes sleep difficult
• Doom scrolling and excessive phone use increase stress and anxiety
• Meditation, prayer, breathing exercises, and intentional self-talk can help regulate emotions
• Emotions are temporary, but the stories we attach to them can become beliefs
• Parents often put themselves last, but self-care is necessary to care for others well
• Consistency matters more than perfection
• Staying present helps reduce anxiety about the future
• You do not need to solve your entire future today
• Small daily habits stack up over time

Coach Steve’s Instagram: @coachstevekrebs Coach Steve’s website: coachsteve.com

If this episode encouraged you, challenged you, or helped you feel less alone, please share it with someone who may need to hear it. Sometimes, one conversation can completely change the direction someone is heading mentally.

Visit Spectrum in Camouflage for more episodes and resources.

You can always reach out to me directly at tommy@spectrumincamouflage.com.

• We’re on TikTok : tiktok.com/@spectrum_in_camouflage
• Join our Facebook Group : facebook.com/groups/4002769846662357
• See us on Instagram : instagram.com/spectrum_in_camouflage

Together, we can create a community to support autistic kids and their families.

If you have questions or ideas or want to share your journey, email me at tommy@spectrumincamouflage.com.

Let’s learn, grow, and make a difference, one step, one piece of the puzzle, one child at a time.

Hey, What's Up! It's Tommy.

This episode of Spectrum in Camouflage is one of the most honest and emotional conversations we’ve had in a while. Kailee joins me as we talk about the reality of parenting a profoundly autistic child, the emotions that can sneak up on you, and how easy it is to get pulled into fear about the future.

What started as a simple conversation about laundry piles, marriage communication, and everyday life turned into a much deeper discussion about what it feels like to catch a glimpse of your possible future as autism parents. Kailee shares an emotional moment she had at a greenhouse after seeing an older father caring for his adult son with special needs. That interaction brought up fear, hope, grief, love, and the overwhelming reality that caregiving may never truly end.

We talk openly about how autism affects marriage, mental health, routines, communication, and even the way we think about aging and the future. We also discuss how easy it is for parents to live mentally 20 years ahead and completely miss the blessings happening right now.

This episode focuses heavily on Mental Health Awareness Month and the importance of not bottling things up. We share practical things that help us stay grounded, including routines, exercise, journaling, writing lists, having difficult conversations, and finding small daily wins.

Most importantly, we want parents to know they are not alone. There is no perfect roadmap for this life, but there are ways to protect your mental health, strengthen your marriage, and keep moving forward together.

• Parenting a profoundly autistic child often brings complicated emotions about the future.
• Seeing older parents still caregiving can create both fear and hope.
• Communication in marriage is critical, especially during stressful seasons.
• Bottling up emotions can create resentment and unnecessary conflict.
• Small daily accomplishments can improve mental health and confidence.
• Exercise and physical health are important tools for emotional resilience.
• Writing things down, journaling, and making lists can help reduce overwhelm.
• Parents should avoid living too far into the future and missing the present moment.
• Caring for yourself is not selfish, it helps you care for your family better.
• Autism can strain relationships, but it can also strengthen them deeply.

Thank you for spending time with us today. If this episode encouraged you, helped you feel seen, or reminded you that you’re not alone in this journey, please share the show with another parent or caregiver who may need it.

We truly believe that honest conversations help families heal, grow, and stay connected.

Visit Spectrum in Camouflage to follow the journey and explore more episodes.

If you want to reach out directly, share your story, or ask questions, email Tommy at: tommy@spectrumincamouflage.com

• Website: Spectrum in Camouflage
• Email: tommy@spectrumincamouflage.com

• We’re on TikTok: tiktok.com/@spectrum_in_camouflage
• Join our Facebook Group: facebook.com/groups/4002769846662357
• See us on Instagram: instagram.com/spectrum_in_camouflage

Together, we can create a community to support autistic kids and their families.

If you have questions or ideas or want to share your journey, email me at tommy@spectrumincamouflage.com.

Let’s learn, grow, and make a difference, one step, one piece of the puzzle, one child at a time.

Hey, What’s Up! It’s Tommy.

I wanted to jump on and kick off something really important this month. We’re heading into Mental Health Awareness Month, and this has become a core part of my life. Not just because of what I’ve gone through, but because of what so many of you are going through right now.

This episode is real. It’s raw. It’s a check-in.

I talk about grief, loss, guilt, and what it actually looks like to move forward when life doesn’t go the way you planned. I share my experience losing close friends, the weight of survivor’s guilt, and how those moments shaped how I look at mental health today.

If you’re a parent, especially raising a child with autism or special needs, you already know this life can feel overwhelming. There are days when it feels like too much. But I want you to hear this clearly… you don’t have to stay stuck in it.

You can sit beside it. You can work through it. And you can come out stronger.

This episode is about learning how to fill your cup so you can show up for the people who need you most. Because if you’re not okay, it’s hard to give your best to your kids, your family, or anyone else.

I also break down some real stats around depression and suicide, especially in men, and why we need to keep talking about this. Silence is not helping anyone.

This month, we’re going all in on mental health. More conversations. More real talk. More tools to help you keep moving forward.

You’re not alone in this.

• You don’t return to who you were before trauma, you grow into someone stronger
• Grief doesn’t go away, but you can learn to live alongside it
• Mental health is a daily practice, not a one-time fix
• Filling your own cup allows you to better care for your family
• Life will always bring challenges, being prepared mentally makes the difference
• Exercise and physical health play a major role in reducing depression and stress
• Parents of children with special needs carry a heavy load, and support matters
• Even small actions can change someone’s life, including your child’s

If this episode spoke to you, share it with someone who might need to hear it. You never know who is quietly struggling.

Keep showing up. Keep fighting. Keep filling your cup.

You can make a difference, even if it’s just for one person.

Reach out anytime at tommy@spectrumincamouflage.com or visit spectrumincamouflage.com.

• We’re on TikTok: tiktok.com/@spectrum_in_camouflage
• Join our Facebook Group: facebook.com/groups/4002769846662357
• See us on Instagram: instagram.com/spectrum_in_camouflage

Together, we can create a community to support autistic kids and their families.

If you have questions or ideas or want to share your journey, email me at tommy@spectrumincamouflage.com.

Let’s learn, grow, and make a difference, one step, one piece of the puzzle, one child at a time.

Hey, What’s Up! It’s Tommy.

This episode hit deep. I sat down with Tyler Hudson, and what started as a conversation turned into something much bigger. This is dad talk in its rawest form. We talked about grief, fear, faith, purpose, and what it really looks like to raise a profoundly autistic child.

Tyler shares his story as a father, a musician, and now a voice that’s reaching thousands of families. He lives in Tasmania, far removed from the noise, but what he’s saying is cutting through loud and clear. We’re not here as experts. We’re here as dads trying to figure it out and help someone else feel a little less alone.

We get into the hard stuff. Regression. The moment things changed. The questions no one wants to ask. The tension between acceptance and the desire to fix things for the next generation. We also talk about the emotional toll on marriages, siblings, and mental health.

There’s a powerful thread running through this whole conversation. Grief. Tyler breaks it down in a way that honestly stopped me in my tracks. He believes society itself is grieving autism, stuck in denial, anger, and bargaining. And until we move through that, we won’t face what’s really happening.

We also touched on the controversial side of things. Conversations around causation, research, and even figures like :contentReference[oaicite:0]{index=0}. These are not easy topics, but they matter. The goal is not to attack. It’s to understand and to ask better questions.

More than anything, this episode is about purpose. It’s about realizing there is no “normal life.” There’s just life. And what we do with it.

• Grief is real in the autism journey, and it often follows the stages of denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance
• Many dads feel isolated and silent, but their voices matter just as much
• Profound autism presents very different challenges than what most people picture
• Society may be avoiding hard truths because they are uncomfortable
• Conversations around causation should be explored, not shut down
• Mental health for parents is critical, especially for fathers
• Siblings carry emotional weight that often goes unseen
• Marriage strain is common and needs to be openly discussed
• Small wins matter, sometimes more than anything else

• Purpose can come from pain, even when the situation doesn’t change

• Tyler Hudson’s website: tylerhudsonmusic.com

• Book preview: The Missing Lyrics: A Father’s Story of Autism, Grief, and a Society in Denial
• Social: @tylerhudsonmusic

If this episode spoke to you, I want you to know something. You are not alone. There are other dads, other moms, other families walking this same road. It may feel like you’re the only one on your street dealing with this, but you’re not.

If you need support, reach out. If you have questions, ask. If you’re hurting, don’t sit in it alone.

Check out spectrumincamouflage.com for more episodes and resources.

You can also email me directly at tommy@spectrumincamouflage.com. I read every message.

Let’s keep showing up for our kids, for our families, and for each other.

• We’re on TikTok : tiktok.com/@spectrum_in_camouflage
• Join our Facebook Group : facebook.com/groups/4002769846662357
• See us on Instagram : instagram.com/spectrum_in_camouflage
• Website: spectrumincamouflage.com

Together, we can create a community to support autistic kids and their families.If you have questions or ideas or want to share your journey, email me at tommy@spectrumincamouflage.com.

Let’s learn, grow, and make a difference, one step, one piece of the puzzle, one child at a time.

Hey, What’s Up! It’s Tommy.

This episode is one of those late-night, real conversations. Kailee and I sat down tired, a little punchy, and just talked through life as parents raising a child with autism. It’s Autism Awareness Month, and instead of overthinking it, we just shared what’s actually going on in our world right now.

We talked about Wyatt, the progress he’s been making, and one of the biggest wins we’ve had recently, him learning to swim on his own. That moment meant more than we can explain. It wasn’t just swimming. It was confidence, connection, and a glimpse of what’s possible.

We also got honest about the harder side of this journey. The reality that many families are dealing with, cutting back work, losing income, struggling to find childcare, and feeling like there just isn’t much support out there. These aren’t rare stories. They’re common, and they need to be talked about.

A big part of this episode is about mindset. Trusting your gut. Being willing to try things that feel different. We’ve gone down a lot of paths over the years, some traditional, some not. And what we’ve learned is that progress takes time, consistency, and a willingness to step outside the norm.

Kailee said it best. Be weird. Try something different. Think outside the box. Because sometimes the answers you’re looking for aren’t where everyone else is looking.

We’re not experts. We’re just parents doing our best and sharing what we’re learning along the way. If you’re in this, you’re not alone.

• Autism is a broad spectrum, but profound autism comes with challenges many people do not fully see
• Many parents are forced to reduce work hours or leave jobs to care for their child
• Lack of childcare and support systems is a real and ongoing struggle
• Swimming can support brain and body coordination and create meaningful progress
• Small wins can be huge moments for both the child and the family
• Alternative approaches can provide new insights and opportunities for growth
• Trusting your instincts as a parent matters
• Progress takes time and consistency, not quick fixes
• Real life skills like bathrooming, communication, and independence are critical focuses
• You are not alone, even when it feels like it

If this episode connected with you, share it with someone who needs to hear it.

Go to spectrumincamouflage.com to find all episodes and resources.

If you want to reach out, email me at tommy@spectrumincamouflage.com.

And if you’re listening on Apple or Spotify, please take a second to rate the show. It really helps us reach more people.

Website: spectrumincamouflage.com

Email: tommy@spectrumincamouflage.com

• We’re on TikTok: tiktok.com/@spectrum_in_camouflage
• Join our Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/4002769846662357
• See us on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/spectrum_in_camouflage/

Together, we can create a community to support autistic kids and their families.

If you have questions, ideas, or want to share your journey, email me at tommy@spectrumincamouflage.com.

Let’s learn, grow, and make a difference, one step, one piece of the puzzle, one child at a time.