PBSE Podcast Episode 286, follows the journey of a man in early recovery who is not content with simply staying away from pornography—he wants to feel a deep emotional aversion to it. The article explores this desire for integrity and congruence, addressing how many men feel torn between what they know is harmful and what they are still wired to find stimulating. It offers a compassionate view that acknowledges sexuality as a core part of being human, emphasizing that true recovery doesn't suppress desire but matures and redirects it toward healthy connection.

Through sections on humanizing porn, defining the difference between lust and attraction, and learning to pause when urges arise, the article challenges cultural and internalized messages that shame desire. It teaches that feeling drawn to something doesn’t mean you're broken—it means you're human. The key is learning to observe, question, and understand those urges, transforming them into opportunities for insight and growth rather than reaction and shame.

Ultimately, the article encourages men to pursue a deeper kind of freedom—one that goes beyond abstinence and seeks wholeness. It invites them to reclaim their desires for good, to see their sexuality as something sacred and powerful when channeled intentionally, and to build lives of authentic connection. It’s a call to courage, honesty, and hope—because the path to becoming a man of integrity isn’t just possible, it’s transformative.

For a full transcript of this podcast in article format, go to: I'm Staying Away from Porn, But I Want to FEEL Repulsed by it. How?

Learn more about Mark and Steve's revolutionary online porn/sexual addiction recovery and betrayal trauma healing program at—daretoconnectnow.com

Find out more about Steve Moore at: Ascension Counseling

Learn more about Mark Kastleman at: Reclaim Counseling Services

In relationships impacted by sexual addiction and betrayal trauma, performance anxiety often becomes more than a physical issue—it’s a symptom of deeper emotional disconnection, trauma, and mistrust. Drawing from a heartfelt message submitted to the PBSE Podcast, Episode 285 delves into how men in recovery may find themselves crippled by shame when they’re unable to sexually perform, especially when performance was once their only perceived value in the relationship. For betrayed partners, these failures often reignite fears of rejection, acting out, or hidden deception, leading to a volatile cycle of pain, blame, and miscommunication.

The article explores how cultural messaging around masculinity and sex—especially the notion that a man's worth is tied to his ability to achieve an erection—intensifies this dynamic, adding unrealistic pressure and reinforcing shame. It highlights the need for couples to step back and rebuild trust by fostering open, vulnerable conversations and addressing trauma honestly. Rather than focusing solely on sexual fixes, it encourages couples to build emotional, intellectual, and spiritual intimacy so that sexual connection becomes a natural, healthy expression of deeper relational safety.

Ultimately, the article challenges the idea that sex should lead recovery. Instead, it proposes that sex should follow emotional reconnection, not precede it. By stepping away from cultural stereotypes and performance-based self-worth, and by prioritizing safety and mutual understanding, couples can begin to move from a place of wounding toward a foundation of healing and authentic connection—inside and outside the bedroom.

For a full transcript of this podcast in article format, go to: "Performance Anxiety" is Creating a WALL Betwen Me & My Betrayed Partner! What Advice do you have?

Learn more about Mark and Steve's revolutionary online porn/sexual addiction recovery and betrayal trauma healing program at—daretoconnectnow.com

Find out more about Steve Moore at: Ascension Counseling

Learn more about Mark Kastleman at: Reclaim Counseling Services

In Episode 284 of the PBSE podcast, we dive into the harrowing story of a woman navigating her husband’s sudden shift from sex addiction recovery to identifying as polyamorous. After years of pain, betrayal, and dedicated recovery work, she’s now facing a radical alteration in the foundation of their relationship. Her husband demands acceptance of his new identity, while she grapples with whether this is a genuine expression of self or a veiled escape from the demands of sobriety and responsibility.

Throughout the episode, we explore three critical pillars of relationship health: authenticity, acceptance, and compatibility. Authenticity means being true to oneself—but also responsibly evaluating which parts of the self to honor when they are in conflict. Acceptance involves respecting another’s path without necessarily agreeing with or adopting it. And compatibility is the often-overlooked requirement for sustainable connection—two people must share enough vision, values, and direction for the relationship to survive.

In the end, we encourage listeners, especially betrayed partners, to hold fast to their own truth. While love is a powerful force, it cannot override a lack of compatibility. We challenge the idea that acceptance means self-abandonment and remind everyone that choosing to walk a different path from a partner does not mean you’re unloving—it means you’re honoring the core of who you are.

For a full transcript of this podcast in article format, go to: My Addict Partner is Now Identifying as "Polyamorous" and I Don't Agree. Now What?

Learn more about Mark and Steve's revolutionary online porn/sexual addiction recovery and betrayal trauma healing program at—daretoconnectnow.com

Find out more about Steve Moore at: Ascension Counseling

Learn more about Mark Kastleman at: Reclaim Counseling Services