How does gaslighting actually break a person down — and why is it so effective in narcissistic abuse?

In this episode of Experts Explain Trauma, Lisa Tickel talks with Tim Fletcher about the mechanics of gaslighting: how it erodes identity, trains people to doubt themselves, and creates the perfect environment for control. Tim connects the patterns of childhood conditioning to adult relationships, and explains why building safety and outside support is essential to recover.

This conversation is for anyone trying to make sense of confusing, manipulative interactions — or for those supporting someone who’s been gaslit.

If this resonated, share one word in the comments that describes how you felt while watching — it helps others know they’re not alone.

About Tim Fletcher:

Tim Fletcher is the founder of RE/ACT (Recovery Education for Addictions and Complex Trauma). Known for his practical, no-fluff teaching style, Tim helps people understand complex trauma, addiction, and mental health with clarity and compassion.

A former engineer and pastor turned trauma educator, Tim draws from his own family’s experiences with mental illness and addiction, as well as decades of counseling work. His groundbreaking insights—like the 12 Basic Needs and 60 Characteristics of Complex Trauma—have helped thousands understand why they feel broken, and how to heal with the right tools and support.

Tim is passionate about helping people break free from destructive cycles and rebuild their lives from the inside out—with safety, support, and practical steps forward.

🔗 Connect with Tim:

Website: timfletcher.ca

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@TimFletcher

Instagram/Facebook/TikTok: @timfletcherco.accelyouth6398

Links & Resources

• Healing Starter Kit → https://lisa-tickel.kit.com/62c7639811

• Women’s Healing Workshop → https://healingworkshop.carrd.co/

• Join the Healing Community → https://womenshealingcommunity.carrd.co/

JOIN THE HEALING COMMUNITY HERE: https://womenshealingcommunity.carrd.co/

What’s one small step you can take to stop using food as your only comfort—without adding more shame?

In this Experts Explain Trauma episode, Lisa Tickel and Dr. Jessica Neukam-Helms explore why emotional eating is often misunderstood—and how shifting your perspective can open the door to new, compassionate options.

If you’ve ever felt stuck in the cycle of food, comfort, and guilt, this conversation offers a simple, doable practice to begin changing the pattern.

Subscribe for weekly honest, vulnerable, and practical episodes

Links & Resources

• Healing Starter Kit → https://lisa-tickel.kit.com/62c7639811

• Women’s Healing Workshop → https://healingworkshop.carrd.co/

• Join the Healing Community → https://womenshealingcommunity.carrd.co/

Why does healing sometimes feel like going backwards?

In this episode of Experts Explain Trauma, Lisa Tickel and Dr. Tammy unpack the messy middle of healing—the stage where progress feels unclear, old patterns resurface, and grief shows up in unexpected ways.

They explore why grief is central to recovery, how healing shifts relationships, and why adjusting expectations is key to moving forward with compassion.

If you’ve ever felt stuck in your healing journey, this conversation will bring clarity and reassurance that you’re not alone.

✨ Join Lisa’s healing community to connect with others walking the same path → https://womenshealingcommunity.carrd.co/

✨ Take the next step with Lisa’s 6-week Healing Workshop → https://healingworkshop.carrd.co/

Connect with Dr. Tammy Oluyori

Website: https://drtammyoluyori.com/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/dr.tammy.oluyori

Ebook: Staying Rooted (https://drtammyoluyori.com/staying-rooted/)

00:15 Understanding the Messy Middle of Healing

03:04 The Role of Grief in Healing

06:12 Navigating Relationships During Healing

09:14 The Complexity of Grief

12:08 The Impact of Trauma on Healing

15:06 Expectations and Reality in Healing

18:07 Identifying and Sitting with Grief

21:03 The Ripple Effect of Trauma

23:58 The Importance of Support Systems

26:51 Living Gracefully Through Grief

29:50 Final Thoughts on Healing and Grief

35:13 Navigating Grief and Motherhood

Subscribe for weekly expert insights on trauma recovery, nervous system healing, and reclaiming safety.

What’s the difference between narcissistic traits and narcissistic personality disorder (NPD)? And why does that distinction matter for healing?In this episode of Experts Explain Trauma, Lisa Tickel sits down with trauma recovery expert Tim Fletcher to break down one of the most misunderstood topics in mental health today: narcissism.What part of this conversation stood out most to you? Share in the comments—we’d love to hear your story!00:00 Understanding Narcissism: Traits vs. Disorder02:53 The Impact of Complex Trauma on Narcissism05:45 The Cycle of Narcissistic Behavior08:55 Recognizing Narcissistic Relationships11:58 The Challenges of Leaving a Narcissist14:55 Building Leverage Against Narcissism18:06 Healing from Narcissistic Relationships30:08 Understanding Narcissistic RelationshipsAbout Tim Fletcher:Tim Fletcher is the founder of RE/ACT (Recovery Education for Addictions and Complex Trauma). Known for his practical, no-fluff teaching style, Tim helps people understand complex trauma, addiction, and mental health with clarity and compassion.A former engineer and pastor turned trauma educator, Tim draws from his own family’s experiences with mental illness and addiction, as well as decades of counseling work. His groundbreaking insights—like the 12 Basic Needs and 60 Characteristics of Complex Trauma—have helped thousands understand why they feel broken, and how to heal with the right tools and support.Tim is passionate about helping people break free from destructive cycles and rebuild their lives from the inside out—with safety, support, and practical steps forward.🔗 Connect with Tim: Website: timfletcher.ca YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@TimFletcher Instagram/Facebook/TikTok: @TimFletcherCo

JOIN THE HEALING COMMUNITY HERE: https://womenshealingcommunity.carrd.co/

Is your body holding onto weight as a trauma response?

In this episode of Experts Explain Trauma, psychologist Dr. Jessica Neukam-Helms joins Lisa to unpack a question many trauma survivors ask:

“Could my weight struggles actually be my body’s way of protecting me?”

If you’ve dealt with emotional eating, binge eating, or long-term body image struggles after trauma, this conversation is for you. Dr. Jessica breaks down the nervous system science behind weight gain, how trauma rewires our eating habits, and why compassion and curiosity are essential for healing.

In this video:

– Why trauma survivors may hold onto weight as protection

– How binge eating becomes a nervous system regulation tool

– The role of cortisol, safety, and emotional suppression

– Why healing begins with body awareness, not shame

– How to stop making weight your enemy and reconnect with your body

Whether you’re in recovery from trauma, CPTSD, disordered eating, or simply trying to heal your relationship with food—this episode brings insight and hope.

🔔 Subscribe for weekly trauma education & expert insights

👇 Comment below: Did this resonate with your healing journey?

Why did I fight so hard to keep a toxic relationship alive—when everything in me knew it was hurting me?

In this episode on Experts Explain Trauma, Dr. Nadine Macaluso (Dr. Nae) helps us unpack the emotional, cultural, spiritual, and physiological reasons many survivors cling to abusive relationships—often long after they know they should leave.

This episode dives into the hard truth: love, addiction, cognitive dissonance, shame, religious guilt, and societal conditioning all make leaving incredibly hard. But there is a path forward—and it starts with self-compassion and education.

What You’ll Learn:

🔹 Why smart, loving people stay in toxic relationships

🔹 How love, trauma, and manipulation create a powerful bond

🔹 The role of religious and cultural narratives in staying “too long”

🔹 How to stop self-abandoning and rebuild commitment to yourself

🔹 The importance of self-compassion in breaking free from shame

🔹 Where to start: education, community, and healing resources

About the Expert:

Dr. Nadine Macaluso is a licensed marriage and family therapist who specializes in healing from trauma bonds and narcissistic abuse. Drawing from both professional expertise and lived experience, she helps clients reclaim their lives after toxic relationships.

About the Expert:

Dr. Nadine Macaluso is a licensed marriage and family therapist who specializes in healing from trauma bonds and narcissistic abuse. Drawing from both professional expertise and lived experience, she helps clients reclaim their lives after toxic relationships.

Connect with Dr. Nadine Macaluso

Website: https://drnae.com/

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/drnaelmft

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/therealdrnadine/

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/TheRealDrNadine

Contact Info: nmacaluso1@me.com / (310) 612-1113

Book: Run Like Hell: A Therapist’s Guide to Recognizing, Escaping & Healing from

Trauma Bonds

FREE GIFT FOR LISTENERS: Download the First Chapter of Dr. Nae’s new book, Run Like Hell: A Therapist’s Guide to Recognizing, Escaping, and Healing from Trauma Bonds https://drnae.com/giveaway-book

🔔 Subscribe for more weekly insights from trauma-informed therapists and psychologists.

In this discussion, Rick Alan Ross explains how individuals can be manipulated into creating cults and working for free due to the absence of laws against brainwashing. We also touch upon emerging laws against coercive control in abusive relationships, highlighting the legal and psychological aspects of such situations. We explore the dynamics of manipulation and emotional abuse within these contexts, offering a deeper understanding of these disturbing social phenomena.

Rick Alan Ross is one of the leading experts on cults in the world today. He has consulted with the FBI, the BATF, and various other law enforcement agencies, as well as the governments of Israel and China, on the topic of cults.

He founded and serves as Executive Director of the Cult Education Institute, a non-profit dedicated to research and public education on cults and high-control groups.

Documentaries

· The Rise & Fall of LulaRoe

· Seduced: Inside the NXIVM Cult

· The Vow

· Truth & Lies: Jonestown, Paradise Lost

· America’s Book of Secrets “Scientology”

Connect with Rick:

Website: https://culteducation.com/

X: @rickalanross

Book: Cults Inside Out: https://a.co/d/2FMRSHW

00:00 Introduction

05:17 The Legal Landscape of Cults

07:13 The Psychology of Cult Leaders

09:40 Who Falls for Cults?

12:40 The Process of Indoctrination and Control

19:35 Recovering from Cults

22:16 The Tactics of Cult Leaders

24:55 Case Studies of Notorious Cults

37:53 Understanding Cults and Their Appeal

42:22 Recognizing Narcissistic Behavior

44:49 The Importance of Education and Intuition

46:32 The Control Mechanisms of Cults

48:52 The Impact of Isolation and Fear

54:31 The Challenges of Leaving

57:24 The Long-Term Effects of Cult Involvement

01:00:54 Healing and Moving Forward

01:06:10 Supporting Those in Abusive Relationships

Why do survivors sometimes feel sympathy for their abuser—even after deep harm?

In this episode of Experts Explain Trauma, UK-based counselling psychologist Dr. Tammy Oluyori unpacks this complex trauma response. She explains how people-pleasing, dissociation, fawning, and worthiness wounds can cause survivors to disconnect from their own pain and focus instead on the suffering of those who hurt them.

You’ll learn:

- Why feeling sorry for your abuser is a trauma response—not a character flaw

- How fawning and dissociation protect us from overwhelming pain

- What it looks like to build safety without needing others to be happy

- The power of anger and rituals in trauma recovery

- How to create healing practices that rewire your nervous system

Connect with Dr. Tammy Oluyori

Website: https://drtammyoluyori.com/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/dr.tammy.oluyori

Ebook: Staying Rooted (https://drtammyoluyori.com/staying-rooted/)

Subscribe for weekly expert insights on trauma recovery, nervous system healing, and reclaiming safety.