In this episode, I’m breaking down 5 types of emotionally immature behaviour that high-functioning women often tolerate, excuse or overcompensate for.

We cover:

• What emotional immaturity actually looks like in adult relationships
• The defensive partner who turns every conversation into an attack
• Gaslighting and why it slowly erodes your self-trust
• The minimiser who makes your feelings feel “too much”
• The avoidant who disappears when things get real
• The victim performer who collapses when you ask for accountability
• Why capable, high-achieving women are especially vulnerable to these dynamics
• The nervous system cost of staying in emotionally immature relationships

If this episode resonates and you’re ready to stop carrying the emotional weight in your relationships, I work with high-functioning women in 1:1 therapy to:

• Strengthen boundaries without guilt
• Rebuild trust in your own perception
• Break attachment patterns rooted in childhood
• Stop confusing emotional chaos with chemistry

Lizandra is a registered psychotherapist who works 1:1 with relational trauma in the UK. Book an intro call here.

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Previous Relevant Episodes

4 Attachment Styles in Relationships [Ep 2]

How to Heal from Anxious Attachment [Ep 4]

Is it Narcissism or Avoidant Attachment? [Ep 28]

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In this episode, I talk about the subtle, everyday ways attachment patterns show up in high functioning women.

We explore:

• Why replying quickly can be about regulation, not politeness
• Why resting can feel uncomfortable, even when you’re exhausted
• Why asking for help feels harder than just doing it yourself

Attachment isn’t only romantic love. It shows up in how you move through your day, how safe you feel slowing down, and how much you carry on your own.

📱Book an initial consultation with Lizandra

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In this episode, we dive into high-functioning anxiety—what it really looks like, why it’s so common among high-achieving women, and how childhood experiences can secretly shape the way your nervous system responds to stress.

We talk about:
. How high-functioning anxiety shows up in day-to-day life
. The hidden costs of always “being fine”
. Why your nervous system can keep you in overdrive even when life seems calm
. Small, practical steps to start calming your mind without giving up ambition

If you’ve ever felt exhausted by your own brain, struggled to ask for help, or worried that slowing down means failing, this episode is for you.

📱Book an initial consultation with Lizandra

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If you've ever wondered what avoidant attachment looks like in women, this episode answers that and more.

This looks at the root cause of avoidant attachment, starting with childhood and how it can impact relationships, parenting, friendships and work.

Avoidant attachment doesn't always come with self awareness, but this episode looks at what happens when you pair self awareness in high functioning women and avoidant attachment.

Listen until the end if you want insight on how to shift your relationships from feeling superficial and disconnected to connected and meaningful.

Relevant Episodes

4 Attachment Styles in Relationships [Ep 2]

Developing Secure Attachment When You’ve Experienced Childhood Trauma [Ep 7]

Recognising the Signs of Dismissive Avoidant Attachment: Key Traits and Behaviours [Ep 11]

How to not Lose Yourself in Relationships when you have an Anxious Attachment [Ep 14]

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📱Book an initial consultation with Lizandra

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Visit the Website

Resources

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And we're back after a mini break with a brand new episode.

In this episode, I’m speaking to high-functioning women who look fine on the outside but feel tense, switched on, and disconnected inside. You might be self-aware and insightful, yet still struggle to feel settled in your body or safe in your nervous system.

We explore why understanding your patterns isn’t always enough, and how many women stay stuck in their heads instead of moving into embodiment and integration. I talk about how perfectionism and imposter syndrome link to self-worth, and why high achievement often comes with quiet emotional disconnection.

Now Accepting clients for 1:1 Therapy Book Your Consultation Here (UK & EU Residents Only)

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Christmas has a way of bringing old family dynamics straight back to the surface.

Even if you’ve done the work. Even if you’re self-aware. Even if you usually cope well.

In this replay of one of my most listened-to episodes, I talk through practical, realistic ways to think about boundaries with family at Christmas. Especially when the dynamics are emotionally immature, critical, or draining.

This episode is for you if:
• You feel activated around family, even when you wish you wouldn’t
• You struggle to hold boundaries without guilt or over-explaining
• You end Christmas feeling exhausted, resentful, or like you’ve lost yourself
• You’re high-functioning, capable, and tired of just “pushing through”

This isn’t about cutting people off or becoming emotionally cold.

It’s about understanding why family triggers land so deeply. And how to protect your emotional energy without abandoning yourself.

If Christmas is already feeling like a lot, this episode is here to support you.

🔗 Links & Resources:

👉 Work with Lizandra 1:1

👉 Visit the Website

👉 Follow Lizandra on Instagram

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You like to follow wellness practices but you’re not sure which ones are helpful for nervous system regulation and which ones to leave behind.

There are so many choices that often tap into your deepest fears and insecurities and even with the best of intentions, can make you feel worse.

This episode explores how you can tell the difference between what’s working and what isn’t and how to listen to yourself more so you can make empowered and informed choices.

If you’ve been wondering how to heal from emotional trauma

What supports nervous system regulation

The practices that focus more on capitalism and productivity instead of healing

This episode is for you.

Lizandra is a practicing psychotherapist based in the UK who works with high achieving and high functioning women who want to heal from the past and break unhealthy patterns through deeper self awareness and nervous system regulation healing.

If you are based in the UK and EU, you can book a consultation for 1 to 1 therapy.

📱Book your free 15 minute intro call with Lizandra

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Have you ever wondered what it means to regulate your nervous system?

In this episode you'll learn more about how nervous system regulation doesn't need to be complicated and a starting a simple exercise can help you to feel calmer and relieve anxiety.

This is a supportive practice but it’s not a substitute for therapy.

Lizandra is a MBACP Registered Psychotherapist based in the UK who works online and in St.Albans Hertfordshire.

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Book a free 15 minute consultation with Lizandra

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