Episode Summary

Melinda Eitzen talks with Alesia Coffman of Merrill Lynch Wealth Management about her mission to financially educate and empower women navigating divorce. Drawing on more than 30 years in finance and her own personal experience with divorce, Alesia explains why financial understanding is critical to confidence, long-term stability, and avoiding costly regret during and after the divorce process.

Throughout the episode, Melinda and Alesia break down complex financial concepts in practical, approachable terms. They discuss why assets are not created equal, the hidden risks of private investments, capital calls, pre-tax versus post-tax dollars, and why liquidity matters when dividing marital property. Alesia shares real-world examples from mediation that illustrate how a settlement that looks “fair” on paper can be deeply unbalanced without proper financial analysis.

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About the Guest

Aleisa Coffman is a Wealth Management Advisor with Merrill Lynch and a Certified Divorce Financial Analyst (CDFA). She specializes in helping individuals, particularly women, understand their finances during divorce and make informed decisions that support long-term financial security. Alesia can be contacted at: office number:214-750-2100, email: alesia.coffman@ml.com, website: https://fa.ml.com/alesia-coffman/ or https://fa.ml.com/crockett-associates
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Key Takeaways About Financial Empowerment During Divorce

● Education Creates Confidence: Understanding finances during divorce helps clients move from fear and overwhelm to confidence and clarity.

● Assets Are Not Created Equal: A dollar in cash, a 401(k), a public stock, and a private investment all have different risks, restrictions, tax implications, and liquidity concerns.

● Private Investments Carry Hidden Risks: Private investments may involve capital calls, lack income, be difficult to value, and restrict access to cash, making them risky in divorce settlements.

● Liquidity Is Critical: Clients must consider how they will pay living expenses, taxes, and unexpected costs after divorce, not just the face value of assets.

● Pre-Tax vs. Post-Tax Dollars Matter: Retirement accounts like 401(k)s are not equivalent to cash due to taxes and potential penalties, especially for younger clients.

● Proper Division Avoids Penalties: Retirement accounts can often be divided tax- and penalty-free when done correctly through divorce orders, self-help can create serious financial consequences.

● Early Financial Advocacy Helps: Bringing a financial professional into the process early can save time, reduce stress, and prevent costly mistakes during mediation and settlement.

● Avoid Fear-Based Decisions: Rushing to “just get it over with” can lead to long-term regret. Informed decisions lead to better outcomes.

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Notable Quotes About Divorce and Financial Empowerment

“All investments are not created equal.”

“You don’t want to look back and regret a decision because you didn’t understand what you were agreeing to.”

“A dollar in a 401(k) is not the same as a dollar in cash.”

“Education turns uncertainty into empowerment.”

“You don’t have to be embarrassed about what you don’t know, this isn’t taught in school.”

“I want clients to walk into mediation knowing what they’re looking at instead of being intimidated by a spreadsheet.”

Episode Summary

Melinda Eitzen sits down with Jim Mueller of the Mueller Family Law Group to discuss the realities of marketing for lawyers and business owners. Drawing from decades of experience as family law firm owners, they explore why effective marketing starts long before paid advertising, beginning with professionalism, competence, and how clients experience working with you.

Melinda and Jim discuss the importance of availability, reputation, and word-of-mouth referrals. They also cover common marketing missteps, why consistency matters, and how every interaction with clients, opposing counsel, and colleagues contributes to long-term business development. This episode offers practical guidance for building a sustainable, authentic practice rooted in trust and relationships.

About the Guest

Jim Mueller is the founder of the Mueller Family Law Group and an experienced family law attorney with decades of insight into law firm growth and marketing.

Key Takeaways About Marketing for Lawyers and Business Owners

● Marketing Starts With You: How you present yourself, practice law, and treat people is the foundation of effective marketing.

● Competence Builds Reputation: Doing good work consistently is one of the strongest marketing tools a lawyer has.

● Availability Matters: Being responsive and accessible builds trust and drives referrals.

● Word-of-Mouth Is Powerful: Clients and even opposing counsel can become your best source of future business.

● Branding Is Ongoing: Marketing isn’t a one-time effort, it’s a continuous reflection of your professionalism and values.

● Your Elevator Pitch Counts: Being able to clearly explain who you are and what you do helps others refer business to you.

● Online Presence Matters: Websites and social media should reinforce credibility, not undermine it.

● Be Intentional With Marketing Spend: Lawyers should be thoughtful about where they invest time and money instead of chasing every new marketing trend.

Notable Quotes About Marketing for Lawyers

“Marketing starts with how you practice law and how you treat people.”

“Your reputation is built one interaction at a time.”

“Clients don’t just hire lawyers—they refer experiences.”

“Word-of-mouth is still one of the most effective forms of marketing.”

Episode Summary

Melinda Eitzen sits down with Richard Sutherland, Duffee + Eitzen of counsel and a veteran Texas family law attorney, to demystify one of the most complex areas of divorce: dividing retirement assets. They discuss the different types of retirement plans commonly encountered in divorce, including ERISA plans, military retirement, teacher retirement, and state plans. Highlights why retirement accounts cannot simply be split and also explores common mistakes that lead to lost benefits, and emphasizes why handling retirement correctly the first time is essential for protecting clients’ long-term financial security.

About the Guest

Richard is a highly experienced Texas family law attorney who focuses extensively on retirement division in divorce cases. Practicing as of-counsel at Duffee + Eitzen Wichita Falls office.

Key Takeaways About Dividing Retirement in Divorce

● Not All Retirement Plans Are the Same: ERISA plans, military retirement, teacher retirement, and state plans all follow different rules and terminology.

● QDROs Are Mandatory for ERISA Plans: You cannot divide a 401(k) or pension without a properly drafted and approved Qualified Domestic Relations Order.

● Early Discovery Prevents Big Problems: Attorneys must identify all plans, including predecessor or multiple plans, and obtain the Summary Plan Description early.

● Plan Administrators Should Be Notified During Divorce: Putting plans on notice can prevent participants from borrowing against accounts and reducing marital value.

● Pre-Approval of QDROs Matters: Getting plan approval before finalizing the divorce avoids rejected orders and costly post-divorce lawsuits.

● Military Retirement Is Governed by Federal Law: The 10/10 rule affects direct payment through DFAS, but retirement may still be divisible under Texas law even if the rule doesn’t apply.

● Critical Benefits Must Be Addressed in the Decree: COLAs and survivor benefits cannot be added later if they are omitted from the original divorce decree.

● Statements Don’t Equal Value: Teacher and retirement statements often do not reflect true value—actuarial calculations are frequently required.

● Fixing Retirement Mistakes Later Is Expensive: Missing or incorrect orders can force clients into additional litigation years after divorce.