Episode Summary

Melinda Eitzen talks with Alesia Coffman of Merrill Lynch Wealth Management about her mission to financially educate and empower women navigating divorce. Drawing on more than 30 years in finance and her own personal experience with divorce, Alesia explains why financial understanding is critical to confidence, long-term stability, and avoiding costly regret during and after the divorce process.

Throughout the episode, Melinda and Alesia break down complex financial concepts in practical, approachable terms. They discuss why assets are not created equal, the hidden risks of private investments, capital calls, pre-tax versus post-tax dollars, and why liquidity matters when dividing marital property. Alesia shares real-world examples from mediation that illustrate how a settlement that looks “fair” on paper can be deeply unbalanced without proper financial analysis.

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About the Guest

Aleisa Coffman is a Wealth Management Advisor with Merrill Lynch and a Certified Divorce Financial Analyst (CDFA). She specializes in helping individuals, particularly women, understand their finances during divorce and make informed decisions that support long-term financial security. Alesia can be contacted at: office number:214-750-2100, email: alesia.coffman@ml.com, website: https://fa.ml.com/alesia-coffman/ or https://fa.ml.com/crockett-associates
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Key Takeaways About Financial Empowerment During Divorce

● Education Creates Confidence: Understanding finances during divorce helps clients move from fear and overwhelm to confidence and clarity.

● Assets Are Not Created Equal: A dollar in cash, a 401(k), a public stock, and a private investment all have different risks, restrictions, tax implications, and liquidity concerns.

● Private Investments Carry Hidden Risks: Private investments may involve capital calls, lack income, be difficult to value, and restrict access to cash, making them risky in divorce settlements.

● Liquidity Is Critical: Clients must consider how they will pay living expenses, taxes, and unexpected costs after divorce, not just the face value of assets.

● Pre-Tax vs. Post-Tax Dollars Matter: Retirement accounts like 401(k)s are not equivalent to cash due to taxes and potential penalties, especially for younger clients.

● Proper Division Avoids Penalties: Retirement accounts can often be divided tax- and penalty-free when done correctly through divorce orders, self-help can create serious financial consequences.

● Early Financial Advocacy Helps: Bringing a financial professional into the process early can save time, reduce stress, and prevent costly mistakes during mediation and settlement.

● Avoid Fear-Based Decisions: Rushing to “just get it over with” can lead to long-term regret. Informed decisions lead to better outcomes.

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Notable Quotes About Divorce and Financial Empowerment

“All investments are not created equal.”

“You don’t want to look back and regret a decision because you didn’t understand what you were agreeing to.”

“A dollar in a 401(k) is not the same as a dollar in cash.”

“Education turns uncertainty into empowerment.”

“You don’t have to be embarrassed about what you don’t know, this isn’t taught in school.”

“I want clients to walk into mediation knowing what they’re looking at instead of being intimidated by a spreadsheet.”

Episode Summary

Melinda Eitzen sits down with Jim Mueller of the Mueller Family Law Group to discuss the realities of marketing for lawyers and business owners. Drawing from decades of experience as family law firm owners, they explore why effective marketing starts long before paid advertising, beginning with professionalism, competence, and how clients experience working with you.

Melinda and Jim discuss the importance of availability, reputation, and word-of-mouth referrals. They also cover common marketing missteps, why consistency matters, and how every interaction with clients, opposing counsel, and colleagues contributes to long-term business development. This episode offers practical guidance for building a sustainable, authentic practice rooted in trust and relationships.

About the Guest

Jim Mueller is the founder of the Mueller Family Law Group and an experienced family law attorney with decades of insight into law firm growth and marketing.

Key Takeaways About Marketing for Lawyers and Business Owners

● Marketing Starts With You: How you present yourself, practice law, and treat people is the foundation of effective marketing.

● Competence Builds Reputation: Doing good work consistently is one of the strongest marketing tools a lawyer has.

● Availability Matters: Being responsive and accessible builds trust and drives referrals.

● Word-of-Mouth Is Powerful: Clients and even opposing counsel can become your best source of future business.

● Branding Is Ongoing: Marketing isn’t a one-time effort, it’s a continuous reflection of your professionalism and values.

● Your Elevator Pitch Counts: Being able to clearly explain who you are and what you do helps others refer business to you.

● Online Presence Matters: Websites and social media should reinforce credibility, not undermine it.

● Be Intentional With Marketing Spend: Lawyers should be thoughtful about where they invest time and money instead of chasing every new marketing trend.

Notable Quotes About Marketing for Lawyers

“Marketing starts with how you practice law and how you treat people.”

“Your reputation is built one interaction at a time.”

“Clients don’t just hire lawyers—they refer experiences.”

“Word-of-mouth is still one of the most effective forms of marketing.”

Episode Summary

Melinda Eitzen sits down with Richard Sutherland, Duffee + Eitzen of counsel and a veteran Texas family law attorney, to demystify one of the most complex areas of divorce: dividing retirement assets. They discuss the different types of retirement plans commonly encountered in divorce, including ERISA plans, military retirement, teacher retirement, and state plans. Highlights why retirement accounts cannot simply be split and also explores common mistakes that lead to lost benefits, and emphasizes why handling retirement correctly the first time is essential for protecting clients’ long-term financial security.

About the Guest

Richard is a highly experienced Texas family law attorney who focuses extensively on retirement division in divorce cases. Practicing as of-counsel at Duffee + Eitzen Wichita Falls office.

Key Takeaways About Dividing Retirement in Divorce

● Not All Retirement Plans Are the Same: ERISA plans, military retirement, teacher retirement, and state plans all follow different rules and terminology.

● QDROs Are Mandatory for ERISA Plans: You cannot divide a 401(k) or pension without a properly drafted and approved Qualified Domestic Relations Order.

● Early Discovery Prevents Big Problems: Attorneys must identify all plans, including predecessor or multiple plans, and obtain the Summary Plan Description early.

● Plan Administrators Should Be Notified During Divorce: Putting plans on notice can prevent participants from borrowing against accounts and reducing marital value.

● Pre-Approval of QDROs Matters: Getting plan approval before finalizing the divorce avoids rejected orders and costly post-divorce lawsuits.

● Military Retirement Is Governed by Federal Law: The 10/10 rule affects direct payment through DFAS, but retirement may still be divisible under Texas law even if the rule doesn’t apply.

● Critical Benefits Must Be Addressed in the Decree: COLAs and survivor benefits cannot be added later if they are omitted from the original divorce decree.

● Statements Don’t Equal Value: Teacher and retirement statements often do not reflect true value—actuarial calculations are frequently required.

● Fixing Retirement Mistakes Later Is Expensive: Missing or incorrect orders can force clients into additional litigation years after divorce.

Melinda Eitzen talks with Brittney Bramlett, a partner at Duffee + Eitzen, about what it truly means to prepare for trial in family law cases. They explain why trial preparation begins at the very first consultation, even when settlement is the ultimate goal. And how early strategy impacts every stage of a case.

They discuss how trial timing varies by county, the importance of running both the settlement and trial tracks simultaneously, and why thorough client preparation is critical to helping clients tell the truth clearly and effectively in court.

About the Guest

Brittney Bramlett is a partner at Duffee + Eitzen and an experienced family attorney and mediator.

Key Takeaways About Prepping for Trial in Family Law

● Trial Prep Starts Immediately: Preparation begins at the first consult, even if the goal is settlement. Every decision early on impacts trial readiness.

● Deadlines Aren’t the Whole Story: While hard deadlines exist, best practice often requires preparation well in advance, especially for experts and document production.

● Expert Preparation Takes Time: Experts may need to be designated 120 days before trial, but meaningful expert preparation starts earlier.

● Document Timelines Matter: Some documents require 60 or more business days to gather and tender, making early planning essential.

● Trial Timing Varies by County: Depending on the jurisdiction, trial settings may occur in as little as 45 days or take more than a year.

● Two Tracks Are Always Running: Attorneys prepare simultaneously for settlement and trial. Courts like Dallas County now require mediation before trial.

● Client Preparation Is Critical: Being questioned in court is unnatural and stressful. Clients should understand their goals, the narrative of their case, and practice testimony more than once.

● Telling the Truth Well Matters: There’s a difference between telling the truth and telling it effectively. Preparation helps clients communicate honestly, clearly, and confidently.

● Witness Types Matter:
– Lay Witnesses: Friends, family, teachers, and treating therapists
– Expert Witnesses: financial and custody forensic experts, and other specialized professionals

Episode Summary

Melinda Eitzen talks with Hunter Lewis, a partner at Duffee + Eitzen, about the realities of litigation in family law cases. They explore what effective litigation really looks like—from client preparation and pleadings to evidence, trial strategy, and appellate considerations.

Hunter explains why honesty and full transparency from clients are essential to building an effective litigation strategy. Because courtrooms are an unnatural environment, thorough preparation and storytelling rooted in truth are critical. Melinda and Hunter also discuss the importance of properly drafted pleadings, handling cases involving family violence, navigating varying county evidence rules, and preserving the record for appeal. This episode provides a practical look at what goes into strong family law litigation from start to finish.

About the Guest

Hunter Lewis is a partner at Duffee + Eitzen and an experienced family law litigator.

Key Takeaways About Litigation in Family Law

● Client Transparency Matters: Clients help their attorneys most by sharing everything—not by trying to leave a good impression. Effective litigation relies on complete information to build strategy and tell the client’s story.

● Preparation Is Critical: Court is an unnatural environment. Thorough client preparation helps reduce uncertainty and improves courtroom performance.

● Honesty Wins: The most effective litigation strategies are rooted in truth. Taking ownership of the facts builds credibility, and judges respond to honesty.

● Pleadings Can Decide a Case: Poorly drafted pleadings can eliminate claims or entire cases. Pleadings must align with statutory requirements and be specific enough to preserve appellate rights.

● Evidence Rules Vary: Evidence rules can differ by county and court. Staying current with local rules is critical—failure to do so can result in excluded evidence.

● Motion for Directed Verdict: This motion argues the opposing party has failed to meet their burden of proof and is made after the other side rests but before presenting your case.

● Protecting the Record: Proper record-keeping is essential to support appeals or prevent them altogether. A clean record can make or break an appellate outcome.

Melinda sits down with family law attorney Philip Moore to explain summary judgments and their role in family law cases. Summary judgments allow a judge to rule without a full trial when the facts aren’t in dispute, helping resolve cases quickly and efficiently.

Philip discusses how summary judgments are used in both divorce cases and post-divorce modification actions. They explore what constitutes a substantial change in circumstances for modifications, the types of motions available, and timing considerations under Texas rules. The episode also covers drafting strategies, how judges review summary judgments, and practical advice.

About the Guest:

Philip W. Moore, Jr. is a family law attorney of Moore Family Law practicing in Frisco, Tx. To contact, please call (214) 764-8033 or visit Frisco Divorce Attorney | Moore Family Law, P.C.

Key Takeaways About Summary Judgements in Family Law:

- Definition: Summary judgments are a procedural tool used when the facts are undisputed and no genuine issue of material fact exists. The judge can rule as a matter of law without a trial.

- Purpose: They help avoid jury trials, resolve cases early, and streamline litigation.

- Applicable Cases: Used in divorce cases and post-divorce modifications.

- Modifications: Only substantial changes qualify, such as serious health issues, abuse, or parent arrests. Normal life events like children aging, minor schedule changes, or remarriage usually do not meet the threshold.

- Types of Motions:

- Traditional Summary Judgment: Can be filed anytime after the party has appeared.

- No-Evidence Motion: Can be filed when the opposing party has produced discovery; must be filed at least 21 days before the hearing.

- Reply: Allows the moving party to respond if the opposing side has produced discovery that still fails to establish a material fact.

- Drafting Considerations: Include statements, intentions, or acknowledgments regarding foreseeable changes when preparing orders.

- Judge Preferences: Some judges prefer detailed written submissions, while others also allow oral presentations at the hearing.

- Timeline Rules:

- 21 days’ notice before the hearing is required.

- Responses are due 7 days before the hearing.

- No strict deadline exists for replies to the response under Texas Rules of Civil Procedure.

Notable Quotes About Summary Judgements:

“Summary judgments are a way to resolve cases when the facts aren’t in dispute—saving time and avoiding a jury trial.”

“Only substantial, material changes rise to the level required for modification—things like health issues, abuse, or arrests, not minor life events.”

“Judges vary: some like to read all submissions in advance, others want a clear oral presentation at the hearing.”

In this episode, Melinda sits down with fellow Duffee+Eitzen partner, Jodi Bender, to discuss her Texas Supreme Court family law case, what that process was like, and how it now impacts family law across Texas.

Key Takeaways from the Episode

Texas Court Structure:
· Three levels: trial court, appellate court, and Texas Supreme Court.
· Less than 10% of cases requested for review by the Supreme Court are actually heard.

Appeals Are Not a “Do-Over”:
· No new witnesses or arguments are presented.
· The appellate court reviews legal errors made during trial (e.g., evidence wrongly excluded or admitted).
· Attorneys must show that the error was harmful to the case and preserve the issue in the record with an offer of proof.

Importance of Record-Keeping:
· Maintaining a clear and detailed trial record is essential for a successful appeal.
· Appeals can take years to resolve.

Jodi’s Case Overview:
· Involved property division — specifically whether a bonus earned during marriage was community property or separate property.
· Jodi argued the bonus was community property because it was accrued during the marriage and tied to the husband’s performance.
· The Texas Supreme Court agreed with Jodi, ruling that the bonus should be considered community property.

Impact of the Ruling:
· Clarified that compensation outside of salary (e.g., bonuses, stock options, fringe benefits) must be evaluated based on when it was earned, not when it was received.
· Addressed potential gamesmanship, where individuals could manipulate salary and bonuses to affect property division.
· Although Jodi’s case did not create new law, it provided a new interpretation and clarification of existing statutes.

Broader Implications for Family Law:
· Influences mediation and settlement negotiations, as bonuses and deferred compensation must be analyzed carefully before trial.
· Reinforces the importance of understanding each party’s compensation structure in divorce cases.
· Connects to new family code legislation that includes formulas for deferred compensation but still leaves ambiguity on handling bonuses.

About Jodi Bender Today:
· Continues to practice family law and head the Witchia Falls D+E location, as well as, Dallas metro area.
· Has expanded her work to include mediation as a mediator herself.

Litigation Update: 2025 Family Law Reforms in Texas

Melinda sits down with Duffee + Eitzen associate attorney, Devin Kerns, who breaks down the most important 2025 updates to Texas family law. The changes impact child support, protective orders, non-parent rights, and enforcement provisions—each reshaping how courts prioritize safety, parental authority, and long-term family outcomes.

About the Guest

Devin Kerns is an associate attorney at Duffee + Eitzen in Dallas, TX.

Child Support

• The net resources cap for child support has increased from $9,200 to $11,700 per month, reflecting a 27% rise.
• The standard calculation remains: 20% of the paying parent’s monthly income for one child.
• Parents can still negotiate individual child support agreements, but those exist alongside the statutory increase.
• The Texas Attorney General’s Office continues to review child support cases at no cost.

Protective Orders

• A Protective Order (PO) now takes legal priority over any custody or divorce decree in place.
• SAPOs (Stalking/Abuse Protective Orders) automatically last two years.
• The showing that violence was likely to recur is still no longer required.
• Transfers to divorce court are now mandatory (previously discretionary) unless the court determines that doing so would endanger the protected party’s safety.

Non-Parent Rights

• The definition of “non-parent” includes stepparents, grandparents, aunts, uncles, and other non-biological or non-adoptive caregivers.
• Texas has tightened the standard for non-parent standing in custody or access cases.
• Previously, standing required actual care, control, or possession of a child for at least six months.
• The new statute replaces “actual” with “exclusive,” although this term is undefined by the statue.
• The stepparent statute granting standing after the death of a biological parent has been completely repealed.

Fit Parent Presumption

• The fit parent presumption now carries stronger legal protection for biological and adoptive parents.
• Courts require clear and convincing evidence to override parental rights, now clarifying the application burden of proof.
• Non-parents cannot overcome this presumption by referencing prior agreed orders or informal arrangements.
• This shift reinforces that parental autonomy and decision-making remain the court’s priority unless substantial evidence shows otherwise.

Enforcements

• A new “Three Strikes” provision increases accountability for repeated violations of court orders.
• After three prior contempt findings for violating a possession or access order, the fourth violation:
  • Constitutes a material and substantial change, providing grounds for modification, and
  • Requires commitment to jail.
• In effect, four deliberate violations of a court order now lead to incarceration.

Quotes from the Discussion

“Litigating in a family is very different than litigating between two business partners.”

— Devin Kerns, Associate Attorney, Duffee + Eitzen

“The court is not interested in getting into the personal decision-making of a parent.”

— Devin Kerns, Associate Attorney, Duffee + Eitzen