What can astrology really tell us about our relationships?

In Episode 5 of Of Flesh And Stars, Mark Flaherty and Cameron Joyner explore relationship astrology beyond the usual question of whether two people are “compatible.”

They begin with a more fundamental question: Do we understand our own needs well enough to choose relationships that can actually support who we are?

Using their own charts, relationships and experiences, Mark and Cam explore how astrology can reveal recurring relational themes, seemingly contradictory needs, patterns of attraction, communication styles, spiritual needs and the dynamics that can either strengthen or undermine a relationship.

They also look at synastry in long-term relationships, including the importance of Ascendant–Descendant connections, Saturn aspects and the more challenging aspects that can bring shadow, conflict and growth.

But perhaps most importantly, they explore the limits of relationship astrology. Astrology can illuminate a relationship, but it shouldn't make the decision for you. The chart can help us understand ourselves and each other more deeply — but we are still responsible for how we choose to live and love.

• Why relationship astrology should begin with understanding yourself
• Identifying your core relational needs
• Why contradictory needs can create recurring relationship patterns
• How themes repeated throughout a birth chart can reveal important life patterns
• Mark's experience of a relationship that looked right on paper but wasn't
• Spirituality, idealisation and the search for “the perfect one”
• How astrology can reveal what we project onto our partners
• Cam's relationship and the importance of communication
• Using synastry to understand long-term relationship dynamics
• Ascendant–Descendant connections and their importance
• Saturn, commitment and longevity
• Challenging synastry aspects, conflict and shadow work
• Why astrology shouldn't make your relationship decisions
• Finding a healthy relationship with astrology itself

(00:00) What Is Relationship Astrology?
(02:37) How Astrology Can Help Our Relationships
(04:46) Start With Yourself
(06:42) Reading Repeating Themes in the Birth Chart
(09:11) Mark's Relational Patterns
(10:00) When a Relationship Looks Right but Feels Wrong
(14:06) What We Really Need From a Partner
(18:18) Synastry Doesn't Tell the Whole Story
(20:09) Don't Let Astrology Make Your Decisions
(22:15) Are We Looking for Something Greater in Our Partners?
(25:21) Relationships as a Path of Spiritual Growth
(29:07) Understanding Your Partner's Core Needs
(36:16) Looking at Synastry
(42:28) Ascendant, Descendant & Long-Term Relationships
(47:16) Saturn, Conflict & Relationship Longevity
(51:43) How to Use Relationship Astrology Skillfully
(54:04) Can Astrology Tell Us If a Relationship Will Work?
(56:11) Final Thoughts: Start With Your Own Chart

Of Flesh and Stars with Mark Flaherty explores the beauty, pain and mystery of this astonishing human experience.

The Stars episodes explore astrology through real stories, personal experience and astrological charts — bringing the symbolism of the planets and stars into the lived reality of human life.

The Flesh episodes are intimate conversations with shamans, healers, embodiment practitioners and others exploring the deeper dimensions of being human.

What is healing, and what if healing isn't about fixing what's wrong with us, but about becoming more fully who we are?

In this episode of Of Flesh And Stars, I’m joined by my old friend Bernhard Karshagen, a Huachumero and healer living in Peru’s Sacred Valley.

Bernhard has spent almost 20 years working with Huachuma (San Pedro cactus), supporting people through emotional healing, trauma, spiritual growth and deeper embodiment. We explore the distinctive qualities of San Pedro, how it differs from ayahuasca, and the role of the body, heart and nervous system in healing.

Bernhard also shares his extraordinary personal journey from scoliosis and a life-threatening surgical experience, through years of depression, to his first experiences with ayahuasca and San Pedro and eventually to living and working in the Andes.

We talk about what healing really means, the relationship between plant medicine and consciousness, the living presence of the Andes mountains, his experiences with the Elohim and energetic frequencies, and the new sanctuary he has created in the Sacred Valley.

This is a conversation about healing, embodiment, consciousness, plant medicine, spirituality, the human experience and the mystery of becoming more fully ourselves.

IN THIS EPISODE

* Huachuma (San Pedro) and its relationship to the heart and body
* San Pedro compared with Ayahuasca
* Bernhard's journey through depression, trauma and plant medicine
* What healing means beyond simply fixing ourselves
* The sacred mountains and spiritual landscape of the Andes
* The Elohim, energetic frequencies and spiritual transformation
* Bernhard's new Sanctuary and his work in the Sacred Valley

CHAPTERS

(00:00) San Pedro, Ayahuasca & the Human Experience
(00:51) Meet Bernhard
(02:39) What Is Huachuma (San Pedro)?
(06:09) San Pedro vs Ayahuasca
(09:40) Why San Pedro Can Be Challenging
(12:06) The Sacred Valley & the Living Mountains
(17:55) Bernhard & Mark: A 19-Year Healing Journey
(23:19) What Is Healing?
(28:19) Bernhard's Journey to Plant Medicine
(36:00) From Ayahuasca to San Pedro
(42:39) The Intelligence of Plant Medicine
(47:24) From Personal Healing to Serving Others
(53:21) The New Sanctuary & Energetic Work
(55:40) The Elohim & Frequencies
(01:03:57) Raising Our Frequency & Shadow Work
(01:12:37) Presence, Grace & the Healing Process
(01:16:45) Bernhard's Work in the Sacred Valley

ABOUT BERNHARD

Bernard Karshagen is a South African living in Peru's Sacred Valley with his wife and three children.

His work includes Huachuma ceremonies, mentoring and guidance for people moving through life transitions, trauma, depression, anxiety and deeper processes of self-discovery.

Bernhard's work takes place at Sanctuary in the Sacred Valley, where he offers personalised retreats, Huachuma ceremonies and longer dieta retreats.

🌐 Sanctuary: thesacredsanctuary.com


ABOUT OF FLESH AND STARS

Conversations and stories on the beauty, pain and mystery of this astonishing human experience with astrologer Mark Flaherty.

In conversation with astrologers, shamans, healers and embodiment practitioners, we explore the profound mystery of being human, and the ways planetary symbolism, spiritual wisdom and embodied experience can help us discover and follow our own individual soul's calling.

Mark Flaherty Astrology
🌐 markflaherty.com/

If you enjoyed this episode, subscribe to the channel, leave a comment and share it with anybody interested in the deeper questions of being human.

What is astrology — and how does it actually work?

In this episode, Mark Flaherty and Cameron Joyner explore astrology as a bridge between the seen and unseen worlds, using personal stories and real astrological charts to explore desire, relationships, life lessons and the mysterious patterns that shape our lives.

From Mark's disastrous attempt to use electional astrology to engineer the perfect first date, to a powerful Neptune story about illusion, uncertainty and learning to wait, the conversation explores what happens when we try to use astrology to control life — and what becomes possible when we learn to trust it instead.

Mark and Cam also explore the technical and imaginative sides of astrology, the importance of house rulerships, the idea of astrology as a map rather than the territory, and the strange question of why astrology seems to work at all.

Along the way, they share stories about relationships, transformation, marriage, synchronicity, Carl Jung's extraordinary "cosmic marriage" experiment and the intriguing parallels between astrology and quantum physics.

### In this episode

• Astrology as communion with the unseen world

• Desire, soul and divine will

• Why astrology can't be used to control the universe

• Mark's electional astrology dating disaster

• Who is "driving the astrological bus"?

• Astrology as teacher, mentor and friend

• Logic, technique, intuition and imagination

• House rulerships and reading the chart

• Neptune, illusion, relationships and learning to wait

• Astrology as a map for transformation

• Carl Jung's "cosmic marriage" experiment

• Synchronicity, quantum physics and the mystery of astrology

### Memorable moments

"Who's driving the bus?"

"Astrology can't help us avoid the lessons that we need to have."

"The map is not the territory."

"We are implicated. We are not just detached, wise oracles."

"There is order here, but it's a higher order."

### Chapters

(00:00) What is astrology and how does it work?

(05:43) Desire, soul and divine will

(08:13) When astrology becomes an attempt to control life

(10:31) Mark's electional astrology dating disaster

(16:08) Who's driving the astrological bus?

(24:11) Astrology: logic, imagination and intuition

(33:42) Neptune, relationships and the danger of illusion

(40:59) Learning to wait and trust the process

(49:00) Astrology as a map for transformation

(56:54) Mystery, awe and the limits of explanation

(01:04:35) Carl Jung and the cosmic marriage experiment

(01:33:49) Synchronicity, quantum physics and the mystery of astrology

### About the guest

Cameron Joyner is a fellow astrologer whose approach to astrology has been shaped by his own experiences of transformation, healing and learning to work with the symbolism of his chart rather than trying to escape it.

### About Of Flesh And Stars

Conversations and stories on the beauty, pain and mystery of this astonishing human experience.

The Stars episodes explore astrology through real stories, personal experience and astrological charts — bringing the symbolism of the planets and stars into the lived reality of human life.

The Flesh episodes are intimate conversations with shamans, healer, embodiment practitioners and artists about their lives, experiences and work.

If you enjoyed this episode, please subscribe, leave a review and share it with someone who might enjoy the conversation.

🌐 Website: https://markflaherty.com/