I recorded this at 5am and was whispering to not wake up my hubby.
I didn’t want to die.
I was sitting in the yard, unable to enjoy even the simplest pleasures: watching my dogs play, seeing the sun shine. That wasn’t a life.
I didn’t want to die. I just knew that what I was doing was barely existing.
When you’re constantly dizzy and chronically fatigued, 24 hours in a day feels never-ending.
Over and over again for almost two years… i had the thought that if it weren’t for our dogs, my husband, my mother, and even the people who love, respect, and look up to me , I’d be okay with not being here. (I wasn’t suicidal, I just didn’t want to suffer this way.)
Living with chronic illness and having my life diminished so greatly took me to some dark places.
They say when you get to rock bottom, the only way is up.
My north star has always been: no matter what, I’m going to live a joyful life.
So I got to work, a different kind of work.
At the end of 2021, I made a decision to do whatever it takes to reclaim myself.
What had gotten me to this state was something I now see in so many successful women:
overriding the body’s signals for rest and a different approach to life that doesnt require powering through.
Even though I was running a seven-figure business, and on the outside it looked like I had the perfect life, there were certain behaviors that, over time, led to my body saying: no more.
🐍 I would jump straight into work after waking up.
🐍 I’d get so focused that I worked into the late evening despite my husband’s comments.
🐍I was working out and eating well because it was literally my career & lifestyle, but I wasn’t taking care of my inner landscape. (Many confuse a fit body with true holistic health)
🐍 I was working with people & in friendships who drained me.
🐍 I was saying yes to too many beautiful requests to contribute.
I wanted to be of service. I was capable. But too many yeses led to my detriment.
🐍 Back-to-back Zoom calls.
🐍 Loosey-goosey boundaries.
The list of how I unknowingly self-abandoned is longggg.
When I decided to heal abd reclaim my life, like with everything else, I went all in.
Colonics. Functional medicine supplements. Hyperbaric chamber therapy. All sorts of gadgets and devices. Tens and tens of $$$.
They all helped a little, but I still wasn’t getting to the root cause.
My nervous system had become so dysregulated that it was wreaking havoc in my body. That was the missing link.
I was outsourcing my healing, thinking the devices or supplements would fix it, without changing my behavior, my beliefs, or how I was showing up in my life.
Working with my body — specifically my nervous system — gave me breathing room.
It opened space. It lifted the brain fog and dizziness I had been carrying for years.
But that was only part of the equation.
Because you only work on your nervous system and keep the same overworking, overdoing, over-people-pleasing, over-saying-yes patterns, you will stay in a vicious cycle of Band-Aid solutions.
Intuitively, I knew I had to change my way of being. And I did.
Today, I have energy to spare. My brain is clear, crystal clear. The vertigo is completely gone. My love of life is back. 🎉
At 51, this as a new era of wisdom and joy unleashed.
My mission is to guide other women who, through no fault of their own, have been married to the grind and the hustle, whose bodies are starting to say no, or have already made a big declaration of “we cannot do this anymore.”
This is why I created The Reclamation.
If you’ve been ignoring your body for much of your life…
If you’ve been overriding its signals for rest…
If you’ve been over-giving, over-functioning, overworking and you’ve built a very successful life that looks great on paper…
You don’t come out of that unscathed.
The Reclamation mastermind, a 6-month experience, is about truly reclaiming your vitality, your voice, and your inner light. I walk with you as you go out in the laboratory of life, becoming the updated, vibrant versiok of you.
It’s not just for women experiencing chronic illness or burnout.
You don’t have to wait until you hit that point.
We start February 10. Doors are open. 7.2k for 6 months in an intimate container of up to 10 women.
By July, you’ll be feeling alive, vibrant, and shining the light that you were always meant to shine.
DM for details and incredibly juicy BONUS not listed on website.
♥️Barbie
The Reclamation Mastermind: https://www.barbiekalev.com/reclamation
15 Min.