Do you fight because of what your spouse did, or because of what you want? And what if the greatest problem in your marriage isn't actually your partner—but your own unchecked desires?

In this episode, we tackle the uncomfortable truth about conflict in marriage. Drawing from James 4:1-2, we reveal that fights don't primarily come from personality differences, stress, or even our spouse's behavior—they come from our own passions at war within us.

We expose how conflict reveals what we're worshiping in our hearts. When we demand comfort, control, being right, respect, or ease, we're practicing self-idolatry. As we say: "I must have control" really means "I'll sin when I lose it." "I must have affirmation" means "I'll punish you when I don't get it." "I must win" means "I'll wound you to do it." This is spiritual immaturity—putting ourselves above our spouse.

We close with this truth: Conflict isn't proof your marriage is broken—it's proof you're both sinners in need of grace. And grace is not scarce in a gospel-centered marriage. The more you fill yourself with who Christ is and what His Word says, the closer those truths will be to your thoughts in the middle of conflict.

If you would like prayer for your marriage or anything at all, email us at everydayidopod@gmail.com. We would love to pray for you and be an encouragement! You can also message us on Instagram at ⁠⁠⁠⁠everyday_i_do_podcast⁠⁠⁠⁠.

Who gets to define marriage—the Creator or culture? And what happens when society's vision of "happily ever after" directly contradicts God's design for covenant?

In this episode, we explore side-by-side comparisons between what culture says about marriage versus what the Bible teaches. Every generation has opinions about marriage, but we ask the critical question: whose voice matters most?

We break down key contrasts:

Purpose of Marriage, Love, Commitment, Roles, Conflict, and Divorce.

We close with this truth: Culture says marriage is about finding "the one." The Bible says marriage is about becoming the one.

More Bible vs. Culture Contrast Statements:

Culture: Marriage is about finding “the one.”

Bible: Marriage is about becoming one. (Genesis 2:24)

Culture: Follow your heart.

Bible: Guard your heart. (Proverbs 4:23)

Culture: Marriage should be easy if it’s right.

Bible: Marriage takes work because you’re both sinners. (Romans 3:23)

Culture: Marriage exists to serve me.

Bible: Marriage teaches me how to serve. (Mark 10:45, Ephesians 5)

Culture: Love means affirming everything.

Bible: Love means speaking truth—even when it’s hard. (Ephesians 4:15)

Culture: If you’re unhappy, you’re justified in leaving.

Bible: Endurance produces character. (Romans 5:3–4)

Culture: Marriage is private.

Bible: Marriage is public, covenantal, and accountable. (Malachi 2:14)

Culture: Chemistry sustains marriage.

Bible: Character sustains marriage. (Galatians 5:22–23)

Culture: Marriage is about self-expression.

Bible: Marriage is about self-denial. (Luke 9:23)

Culture: You marry someone to complete you.

Bible: You marry someone to sharpen you. (Proverbs 27:17)

Culture: Marriage should fit your lifestyle.

Bible: Marriage reshapes your life. (Genesis 2:24)

Culture: Romance keeps a marriage alive.

Bible: Faithfulness keeps a marriage alive. (Hosea, Matthew 25:21)

Culture: Marriage is disposable.

Bible: Marriage is sacred. (Hebrews 13:4)

Culture: The goal is personal happiness.

Bible: The goal is Christlikeness. (Romans 8:29)

Culture: Does this marriage serve me?

Bible: Does this marriage reflect Christ?

If you would like prayer for your marriage or anything at all, email us at everydayidopod@gmail.com. We would love to pray for you and be an encouragement! You can also message us on Instagram at ⁠⁠⁠⁠everyday_i_do_podcast⁠⁠⁠⁠.

What are you saying about your spouse when they're not in the room? And could the way you talk about your marriage to others be slowly poisoning it instead of protecting it?

In this episode, we shift focus from how we talk to each other to how we talk about each other. Drawing from Genesis 2:24, we explore how "one flesh" means you have a shared reputation—when people think of one of you, they think of both. What you say about your spouse when they're not around either builds up your marriage or tears it down.

We dive deep into James 3:6-8, which describes the tongue as "a flame of fire" and "full of deadly poison" that no one can tame on their own. We emphasize that you can tear down your spouse publicly, but if you do, you're tearing down your own flesh—and it reflects poorly on you.

The core of this episode distinguishes between processing (healthy, purposeful reflection aimed at clarity and growth) and poisoning (venting to anyone who will listen to validate your side). We explain how processing should be done with safe, godly people who aren't gossips and won't use your words against you. It requires the right tone—not complaining, derogatory, or sarcastic.

Poisoning looks like seeking validation, saying "I'm just venting," complaining to anyone (coworkers, friends, even your children—which is never fair to them), and using exaggerated, one-sided language. We share how research shows that repeated complaining physically rewires your brain to prioritize stress and negativity.

We address when it IS time to speak up: abuse, addiction, or unrepentant sin require biblical counseling. But we also advocate for "preventative maintenance"—seeking godly counsel even when things are fine, like a tune-up for your car. Marriage groups aren't just for crisis; they're for stewardship.

Your spouse should never have to wonder if you're on their side when they're not in the room. Guard your vows by protecting your marriage daily—in prayer, in God's Word, and in how you talk about each other.

If you would like prayer for your marriage or anything at all, email us at everydayidopod@gmail.com. We would love to pray for you and be an encouragement! You can also message us on Instagram at ⁠⁠⁠⁠everyday_i_do_podcast⁠⁠⁠⁠.