This audiobook is a history of my father, Giles Holtom’s life. He was a member of the Royal Army Veterinary Corps.

Giles told me and my brothers these wild, imaginative, and exciting stories as children, sitting at the dinner table. I believed them because, well, I was seven at the time, and he was my dad. It was only in later life, when I retold the stories to other people, that I realized their inherent lack of believability. So it was down to me to investigate the details of his life and the places he visited.

He visited 46 countries, before British Airways existed and could take you there. Mostly he got there by walking or hitching, on trains, boats, and lorries. Sometimes he rode there on camels, donkeys, or yaks.

Amongst other places, he was in Austria when it was partitioned, Egypt during the fight for independence, and Malaya and Burma during the communist uprisings. He was behind the Iron Curtain (at least) twice, arrested as a spy (by the Americans), court martialed and awarded a medal from the same action, court martialed (again), and then promoted (again).

Throughout all of this, he was followed by people he called "men in grey coats" - meaning military intelligence. At the same time, one person, throughout his army career, was actively trying to get him killed, or at least badly hurt.

There were just so many questions. How is it that he spoke fluent Arabic? What ever happened to the baby elephant he got me? Why did so many strange, uninvited people turn up at his funeral, including representatives from Princess Anne and Prince Charles?