Infographic: WHAT TOOK 51 YEARS?

WHY NAME THE BABY?

CAN A NAME HEAL?

WHAT STAYED BURIED?

WHAT FINALLY SURFACED?

Description:

What if abortion grief does not surface until years later?

Matt Freeman of Rachel’s Vineyard joins Scott and Marcie to talk about abortion healing and the buried, unresolved emotions that can remain long after abortion.

Most people do not come to a retreat for four or five years. Some wait decades. The longest gap Matt has seen?

51 years.

What can stay hidden for that long? And what finally forces it into the open?

The conversation turns to raw grief, anger, self-medication, and long-carried pain that people may live with for years without ever connecting the dots.

Then there are the men.

The father who felt powerless. The partner who went along with it. The one who pressured her toward it.

What are they carrying when they finally walk into a retreat?

Matt also explains why some people may come too soon, how men grieving alongside women can change the room, and why the physical aftermath of the abortion pill can become part of the trauma itself.

And then comes one of the most intimate and profound parts of the weekend.

Each person is invited to give their child a name. For many, it is also the first time they have ever told their abortion story out loud.

Why name the baby? And what happens when years of silence finally break?

Watch the full conversation on Dear Jane.

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2:52 — Who Comes to Rachel's Vineyard?

3:49 — 51 Years Later

4:14 — When the Pain Finally Connects

5:58 — The Trauma Beneath the Abortion

7:46 — What About the Men?

10:56 — When Couples Don't Stay Together

12:08 — Did This Happen to Me, or Did I Do This?

13:28 — The Three Kinds of Men Who Come

15:06 — What Happens at a Retreat?

15:18 — The Stone

17:27 — Understanding the Context

19:17 — What Can We Handle Right Now?

20:18 — Is the Abortion Pill Trauma Different?

22:13 — When the Bleeding Becomes Part of the Memory

23:02 — What Does Bottoming Out Look Like?

25:06 — When You Never Connected the Dots

26:34 — How Do You Suggest Healing Without Pushing?

27:39 — When Help Feels Like Judgment

28:50 — Why They Name Their Children

31:50 — The Bond a Name Can Create

32:19 — Rachel's Vineyard Around the World

33:00 — How Rachel's Vineyard Began

34:49 — Why Some People Travel Far From Home

35:21 — Is This Retreat for Me?

37:35 — The First Time They Tell the Story

38:20 — Heard, Loved, and Not Judged