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When Love Was Used Against Me

When Love Was Used Against Me

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Foster care is supposed to mean safety, stability, and a chance to heal.

For some children, it becomes something far more complicated—and far more dangerous.


In this episode of The Truth About Trauma, I share what happened when I entered foster care for the first time and finally experienced life in a community: school, routines, neighbors, and the promise of normalcy. But trauma doesn’t disappear when the setting changes. It follows you—into your body, your decisions, and your understanding of what love looks like.


This episode explores hard truths many people avoid:


  • How childhood trauma shapes decision-making and silences instinct

  • Why children comply with abuse when it’s disguised as care

  • How grooming works—not through violence, but through reassurance and control

  • The impact of shame, medication, and loss of bodily autonomy

  • How systems protect adults and reposition children as the problem

  • Why survivors often don’t disclose abuse until much later



This is not a graphic account. It is a truthful one.


Episode 5 examines how trauma makes choices for you, how survival rewires consent, and how a system meant to protect can instead reset and contain a child rather than confront harm.


Content warning: This episode discusses child sexual abuse, grooming, and institutional failure. Listener discretion is strongly advised.


Some stories are painful to hear.

Some truths are painful to accept.

But silence has never protected children—truth has.

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