The First Step to Calm Your Nervous System After Loss

Grief doesn't just affect your heart. It affects your body. In this episode of the Mindfulness & Grief Podcast, Heather Stang and Amanda Palermo explore why grief overwhelms the nervous system and why you can't think your way out of it. When loss shakes your world, symptoms like brain fog, insomnia, body aches, anxiety, and exhaustion are not signs that you are failing. They are signs that your body is under stress.

This episode introduces the first step in the Mindfulness & Grief System: Conscious Relaxation. You'll learn why calming the body comes before processing meaning, how simple focusing practices interrupt the stress cycle, and why tending to your nervous system is foundational in early grief and during grief waves.

Heather and Amanda share personal experiences of shock, numbness, cognitive confusion, and somatic symptoms after loss. They discuss research on the relaxation response, practical focusing techniques such as breath counting and mantra repetition, and how small, consistent practices can restore a sense of agency.

You'll also learn:

• Why grief creates inflammation and physical symptoms
• How to interrupt rumination through simple attention practices
• What to do when sitting meditation feels impossible
• How to create a sleep sanctuary after loss
• Gentle journaling prompts to help your body find a voice

If grief has left you feeling dysregulated, restless, or exhausted, this episode offers a grounded place to begin. You don't have to eliminate your feelings. You can start by tending to your body.

🧘 Timestamps:

00:00 You Can't Think Your Way Out of Grief
00:42 Welcome & Why the Body Comes First
02:10 Shock, Numbness & Brain Fog After Loss
05:30 When the Numbness Wears Off: Anxiety & Grief Waves
08:45 Why Grief Overwhelms the Nervous System
11:10 The First Step: Conscious Relaxation
13:40 Focusing Practices (Breath Counting & Mantra)
18:50 The Relaxation Response Explained
23:30 Movement as Meditation
27:40 Sensory Practices: Sound, Touch, Scent
30:20 Creating a Sleep Sanctuary After Loss
37:15 Reimagining the Bedroom After Losing a Partner
44:10 Journaling as a Body Practice
50:30 Giving Your Body a Voice (Writing Prompt)
55:40 The Puzzle Metaphor: Putting Pieces Back Together
58:10 This Is Your Home Base in Grief
1:01:30 Closing Reflections

Full show notes and resources:
https://heatherstang.com/podcast/

Connect with Amanda on Instagram:
https://instagram.com/amandapalermo1018

Work with Heather

💜 Try Awaken Grief Support Free for 14 Days
Live support, guided practices, and community for people living with grief.
https://heatherstang.com/grief-group/

🎥 Free Living With Grief Workshop and Live Q&A With Heather
A gentle introduction to mindfulness-based grief support with time for questions.
https://heatherstang.com/living-with-grief-workshop/

🎓 Mindfulness & Grief Coach Certification
Professional training for helpers who want to support others through grief while caring for themselves.
https://heatherstang.com/mindfulness-grief-coach-certification/