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  • Bliss Fest
    Feb 21 2026

    In this episode, Heath and Kyle take a simple fortune cookie message and run it through their usual mix of sarcasm, honesty, and late-night overthinking. What starts as a throwaway line—“success is a ladder you can’t climb with your hands in your pockets”—turns into a surprisingly practical conversation about opportunity, fear, and actually doing something instead of just talking about it. Along the way, they bounce between stale cookies, pop culture confusion, beanies, and a festival called BlissFest that somehow becomes a metaphor for letting go and embracing the chaos. It’s funny, a little reflective, and grounded in the idea that ordinary moments can hit harder than we expect—if we’re paying attention.


    https://linktr.ee/heathfall

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    17 Min.
  • Root Beer Barrel
    Feb 14 2026

    In this episode of the Unfortunate Cookies Podcast, Heath and Kyle embrace the chaos of a late-night recording session, discovering that everything is funnier in the dark. Between cracked fortune cookies and questionable wisdom, the conversation drifts into pure nostalgia—root beer barrels, Werther’s Originals, and the snacks that shaped a generation. It’s a loose, laugh-heavy hang that somehow sneaks in a moment or two of reflection… right before the next joke lands.


    https://linktr.ee/heathfall

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    23 Min.
  • Wolf Ears
    Feb 7 2026

    Join hosts Heath Fahl and Kyle Ascione on the Unfortunate Cookies podcast as they dive into the world of fortune cookies, exploring the humor and mystery behind each message. In this episode, they discuss the concept of "golden opportunities" and what "shortly" really means, all while sharing laughs and personal anecdotes. From debating the orientation of fortune cookies to reminiscing about arcade adventures and the quirks of Great Wolf Lodge, Heath and Kyle keep the conversation lively and entertaining. Tune in for a fun-filled episode that promises to bring a smile to your face and maybe even a bit of wisdom from the cookies!


    https://linktr.ee/heathfall

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    20 Min.
  • Can Can't
    Jan 31 2026

    In this episode of the Unfortunate Cookies podcast, hosts Heath Fall and Kyle Ascione dive into the whimsical world of fortune cookies, exploring the humorous and sometimes perplexing messages they contain. From discussing the meaning of happiness and peace to debating the practicality of climbing ladders with hands in pockets, Heath and Kyle keep the laughs coming. They also share personal anecdotes, including a quirky family tradition involving hot water and coffee. Tune in for a lighthearted conversation filled with unexpected insights and plenty of chuckles. Don't miss the fun as they unwrap the mysteries of fortune cookies, one crumb at a time!


    https://open.spotify.com/show/7qUe57qMOp1oqCZDLis9oS?si=2xurwq7SQ-y1fM_2wEYqSA

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    21 Min.
  • Take This With A Grain Of MSG
    Jan 24 2026

    In this episode of "Unfortunate Cookies," hosts Heath and Kyle dive into the whimsical world of fortune cookies, using each fortune as a springboard for their comedic improvisation. From discussing the nuances of comfort and material wealth to the hilarity of childhood bike adventures, the duo keeps the laughter rolling. Join them as they explore the unexpected connections between fortunes and life's little surprises, all while cracking open a few cookies along the way. Tune in for a blend of humor, nostalgia, and the occasional philosophical musing.

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    50 Min.