I am not afraid of death, I am afraid of leaving behind the ones who cared and supported me throughout the years. I almost died four times, when I was fourteen, twenty-two, twenty-three and twenty-five. I know where I am going, but the other thing that terrifies me is not remember the ones who care about me and supported me as well. What scares me is that I am fighting an unknown illness that has taken everything from me. Between my lung problem and other problems, sleeping is my only way to escape this nightmare. That’s why I am enjoying each moment that life has given me. I always try to be a better person to who I was yesterday. I don’t talk much, and I don’t share much. How can you share something that even you can’t comprehend. You can’t wrap your head around the fight that was given to you. Why it was you that had to go through this. Sleep is like the only escape I have from this harsh reality. This is something that needed to be shared, not just to be real and authentic, but to be raw. There are many days and nights I cry, I dread the next doctor’s visits. I have a wonderful support team and a great team of doctors. Who are trying to figure out what is going on. I have progressing got worse over the last several years. This didn’t happen over night. The night we me was journey I never asked for, but was given for a reason.