Summary
In this heartfelt episode of The Resilience Project, host Julie Brumley engages in a candid conversation with her mother, Karen, about their experiences with adoption. Julie expresses her gratitude for her mother's unwavering support and love throughout her life, emphasizing the importance of understanding the complexities of adoption from both the adoptee's and adoptive parent's perspectives. Karen shares her journey of becoming a mother through adoption, her initial feelings, and the evolution of her understanding of what it means to raise an adopted child. The discussion delves into the emotional nuances of adoption, including the fears and joys that come with it, and the significance of open communication in their relationship.

As they reflect on their shared experiences, Karen reveals her initial apprehensions about Julie's work with adoptees, but ultimately expresses pride in her daughter's commitment to advocating for the adoption community. The episode highlights the importance of love, acceptance, and the ongoing journey of understanding the impact of adoption on both sides of the equation. Through their dialogue, Julie and Karen demonstrate the power of vulnerability and connection in navigating the complexities of family dynamics and identity.

Keywords
adoption, mother-daughter relationship, resilience, adoptee experience, family dynamics, emotional journey, open communication, understanding adoption, love and acceptance

Takeaways
"I feel like we've stolen something precious because we weren't planning on taking you home."
"You were the one that I know in my heart 100% was from day one."
"You have to work through it, learn, in sessions like you provide."

Sound bites
"You were the one that I know in my heart 100% was from day one."
"They would be led by love and follow with action."

Chapters
00:00 Introduction: A Special Guest
01:45 Karen's Perspective on Motherhood
05:42 The Decision to Adopt
08:39 First Impressions: Meeting Julie
15:37 Understanding Adoption: Theories and Realities
18:33 Navigating Emotions: Protecting and Supporting Julie
22:31 The Importance of Feeling Adored
26:24 Connecting with Birth Family: A Journey of Discovery
27:50 Meeting the Birth Family
29:56 Evolving Perspectives on Adoption
34:24 Misunderstandings About Adoption
35:50 The Unspoken Fears of Adoptive Parents
39:03 Watching the Work with Adoptees
42:30 The Importance of Dialogue in Relationships
44:31 Raising an Adopted Child: Key Insights
47:39 Loving Beyond Biology

Website

Instagram: @juliebrumley_

Facebook: julierasbrum

TikTok: @juliebrumley_

Click to Join My Free Adoptee Facebook Group

You Tube: @julie_brumley

Summary
In this conversation, Julie Brumley explores the core issues faced by adoptees, particularly focusing on rejection and its profound impact on identity and emotional health. She discusses the emotional imprints of rejection, the concept of rejection sensitivity, and provides practical exercises for processing and reframing limiting beliefs. The conversation emphasizes the importance of self-acceptance and emotional regulation in overcoming the challenges associated with adoption.

Takeaways

• Adoptees wrestle with core issues like identity, loss, rejection, shame, guilt, and grief.
• Rejection is a powerful experience that occurs pre-verbally for adoptees.
• Emotional imprints of rejection shape how adoptees anticipate and guard against it.
• Fear of rejection can lead to self-sabotage and misreading situations.
• Identifying and reframing limiting beliefs is crucial for healing.
• Sensitivity in adoptees may be linked to rejection sensitivity dysphoria and ADHD.
• Emotional regulation is essential for dealing with rejection.
• Practical exercises can help process negative messages from childhood.
• Transforming limiting beliefs into positive affirmations is a key step in healing.
• Support and resources are available for those navigating these challenges.

Chapters
00:00 Introduction to Core Issues in Adoption
02:43 Understanding Rejection in Adoption
06:02 Rejection Sensitivity and Emotional Dysregulation
09:55 Identifying and Reframing Limiting Beliefs
15:15 Practical Exercise for Overcoming Limiting Beliefs
22:17 Conclusion and Resources for Support

Keywords
adoption, rejection, emotional health, limiting beliefs, identity, adoptees, self-acceptance, emotional regulation, trauma, personal growth

Shame and Guilt episode link - https://www.buzzsprout.com/2549404/episodes/18222388

Processing Emotions Exercise -https://www.cominghometoself.co/offers/btaYBmJo/checkout

PDF of Slides from Video - https://drive.google.com/file/d/15eR4Pv-pElupM9chwgU8ezSrNXH-G1SS/view?usp=sharing

Perspective Shift Exercise -https://www.cominghometoself.co/offers/DA8Me58N/checkout

Website

Instagram: @juliebrumley_

Facebook: julierasbrum

TikTok: @juliebrumley_

Click to Join My Free Adoptee Facebook Group

You Tube: @julie_brumley

As we move into a new year, this episode feels especially meaningful.

In today’s conversation, I’m sharing a powerful episode recorded with my longtime friend and fellow coach, Becky, from about a year ago - during a season when both of us were deeply immersed in our own journeys of identity, healing, and self-discovery.

At the time, neither of us could have fully known how much would continue to unfold in the months ahead. And yet, listening back now, I’m struck by how relevant and grounding this conversation still is - especially as we reflect on what it means to truly come home to ourselves.

Together, we explore:

• what identity really means beyond labels and roles
• how trauma responses can quietly shape who we believe we are
• the difference between ego, intuition, and survival energy
• why somatic work is essential for creating safety in the body
• how shame loses its power through compassion and connection
• and what it looks like to reclaim belonging from within

We also talk openly about the early stages of my own healing journey—when I couldn’t answer the question “Who am I?” without collapsing into shame—and the gradual, gentle process of learning to trust my body, my intuition, and myself again.

This episode isn’t about having it all figured out.
It’s about honoring the small, consistent shifts that create lasting transformation over time.

If you’re entering this new year feeling uncertain, tender, or quietly hopeful…
If you’re learning to listen to yourself instead of pushing through…
If you’re beginning—or continuing—the journey of coming home to who you really are… this conversation is for you.

✨ Key Themes

• Identity as an evolving, embodied experience
• The role of somatic healing in self-discovery
• Shame, self-compassion, and parts work
• Ego vs. intuition and learning to trust inner wisdom
• Healing as a process of integration, not perfection

Chapters
00:00 Introduction to Breakthroughs
02:40 The Power of Connection and Friendship
05:25 Understanding Identity
10:51 The Journey of Self-Discovery
16:28 Practical Steps to Embrace Intuition
22:07 Transforming Triggers into Triumphs
27:37 The Role of Somatic Work in Healing
33:24 Creating a Community for Adoptees
38:53 Conclusion and Call to Action

Keywords
breakthrough, identity, self-discovery, somatic work, intuition, trauma, healing, friendship, community, empowerment

Get the Ego vs Intuition Slide Deck here -https://www.cominghometoself.co/offers/oLhNBhLZ/checkout

Connect with Becky here - https://www.instagram.com/becky_aste/

Website

Instagram: @juliebrumley_

Facebook: julierasbrum

TikTok: @juliebrumley_

Click to Join My Free Adoptee Facebook Group

You Tube: @julie_brumley