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The Desire Question

The Desire Question

Von: Dirt Media
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The Desire Question, hosted by ​​certified sex and couples therapist, author, and consultant Laura Federico (The Cycle Book, Tarcher, 2025), asks authors one simple question: “Is it better to desire, or be desired?”

This question, the desire question, becomes a jumping off point for these authors to discuss desire in their writing, whatever form it may take. This is a Dirt Media podcast.

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  • Appetite and autonomy ft. Alicia Kennedy
    Apr 23 2026

    Host Laura Federico speaks with food and culture writer Alicia Kennedy about her new book, On Eating. They trace how meat has long symbolized masculinity, power, and American abundance, and why we have the ability to create social change through food. They also talk about sibling grief and the role her brother plays in the book.

    ***

    On Eating by Alicia Kennedy

    Alicia's newsletter

    Tomato Tomato

    The Cycle Book by Laura Federico

    ***

    01:00 — Thinness as purity culture

    03:39 — The desire question: Alicia answers as a Scorpio

    05:00 — Loving the world while doubting collective will to change

    08:09 — "No ethical consumption under capitalism" as a convenient excuse to stop trying

    10:32 — Eleven Madison Park and RFK Jr.'s food pyramid

    17:19 — Why unlabeled plant-based food works and why labeling it vegan usually doesn't

    20:16 — The ruthless omnivore as boys' club entry ticket

    22:35 — Women on social media performing hunger while visibly restricting

    27:29 — Writing about sibling loss

    31:09 — Moving to Puerto Rico and critiquing tourism

    ***

    Our music, Hit Her Up, is written by Nakisso Peralta and performed by Chillers.

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    35 Min.
  • Know yourself first ft. Gina Gershon
    Apr 6 2026

    Actress, singer, and author Gina Gershon talks about her new memoir AlphaPussy: How I Survived the Valley and Learned to Love My Boobs with Laura Federico, psychotherapist and host of The Desire Question. Gina resists the idea of AlphaPussy as a guidebook, saying the real message is to know and be honest with yourself. She turns the tables and asks Laura about sex in this climate of swipe culture, sex robots, and a shrinking appetite for soul connection. The episode ends, as the book does, with a rallying cry for self-knowledge.

    ***

    AlphaPussy by Gina Gershon

    The Cycle Book by Laura Federico

    ***

    02:31 — Is it better to desire or be desired?

    06:01 — Gina tells a younger woman who couldn't confront a harassing guru: "Until you can do that, you're always gonna be in a subservient position"

    07:38 — "Some people say follow the money, but I say listen to my gut"

    08:00 — Growing up without social media gave Gina an advantage in reading people

    11:37 — Gina describes being so empathic she sometimes couldn't leave the house

    12:54 — "People are scared, and you know what? They should be. It's a weird time."

    13:32 — Gina asks Laura: are people's sex lives diminishing?

    14:26 — Sex robots, swipe culture, and the shrinking soul connection

    17:21 — How the book actually came together

    18:36 — The gap between what we say we want and what we actually believe

    21:28 — To thine own self be true

    ***

    Our music, Hit Her Up, is written by Nakisso Peralta and performed by Chillers.

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    22 Min.
  • Is hunger the price of desire? ft. Tanya Bush
    Mar 25 2026

    Tanya Bush—writer, baker, and author of Will This Make You Happy?—joins Laura Federico to talk about hunger as a form of desire, and why being hungry can feel more alive than being satisfied. They discuss appetite as self-knowledge, the younger self Tanya writes toward in the book, and how desire once drove her toward baking, romance, travel, and reinvention all at once.

    ***

    Will This Make You Happy?

    Cake Zine

    Laura Federico

    The Cycle Book

    ***

    04:33 — Is it better to desire, or be desired?

    05:36 — Appetite as self-knowledge

    06:07 — Writing toward her younger self

    07:24 — Baking, Italy, and wanting everything

    09:08 — Making pleasure by hand

    13:07 — Hard doesn’t always mean meaningful

    14:06 — Tuscany and the fantasy of transformation

    15:02 — The “intern in paradise” trap

    18:30 — Compassion for the former self

    19:40 — AI in baking and writing

    20:15 — Why community still matters

    21:30 — What’s real online anymore?

    ***

    Our music, Hit Her Up, is written by Nakisso Peralta and performed by Chillers.

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    24 Min.
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