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The Anxious To Secure PODCAST

The Anxious To Secure PODCAST

Von: Jula - The Anxious To Secure Coach
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Welcome to Anxious to Secure - the podcast for anyone who feels anxious in love and wants to feel calm, confident, and connected. If you’re chasing an emotionally unavailable (Avoidant) partner… If you’re attaching out of fear, not love… Your relationship is running on survival mode. (I’ve been there - and it can change.) 🤍 I’m Jula: an anxious attachment coach + certified life coach. In just 6 months, I became a more secure version of myself 🫳🏻🎤 Now I help you stop overthinking every text and feel safe, even when your partner pulls away. If you’re tired of the doubt, panic, and never feeling enough: this is for you. Let’s get you into your Secure Era. 🖤Copyright 2024 All rights reserved. Beziehungen Persönliche Entwicklung Persönlicher Erfolg Sozialwissenschaften
  • 117: *26 Practical things* to heal anxious attachment & become securely attached (in 2026)
    Jan 20 2026

    If you’re still anxiously attached… If you still overthink texts If silence feels like danger If you’re tired of feeling “too much” or not enough

    This episode is for YOU.

    In this podcast, I share 26 practical, real-life things you can start doing in 2026 to finally heal anxious attachment and become SECURELY ATTACHED not just in love, but in life.

    Because this work doesn’t just change your relationships. It changes your ANXIETY, your MENTAL HEALTH, your BODY, your CAREER, your SELF-ESTEEM

    I was anxiously attached for 30+ years. And becoming secure changed EVERYTHING for me.

    Not just how I love. But how I breathe. How I sleep. How I show up How safe I feel inside myself.

    Whether you’re in your 20s, 30s, or 40s — This is some of the most IMPORTANT WORK you’ll ever do.

    Because what’s the point of: ➞ money ➞ holidays ➞ birthdays ➞ success ➞ relationships

    …if you feel anxious, insecure, and disconnected from yourself inside? 🚩

    In this episode, you’ll learn how to: ★ Stop outsourcing your safety to a partner ★ Calm your nervous system (for REAL) ★ Self-soothe instead of spiraling ★ Set boundaries through ACTION, not begging 🚦 ★ Stop overgiving + start receiving 🤍 ★ Sit in discomfort without panicking ★ Heal old wounds instead of reliving them ★ Become your OWN source of security 🔒

    This is not theory. This is PRACTICAL. This is DOABLE. This is LIFE-CHANGING. 🦸🏼‍♀️✨

    🎧 Grab a pen. 📓 Take notes. 🫂 Be gentle with yourself.

    Your younger YOU deserves this. Your future YOU is counting on you. 💎🫶

    💌 Want my support? You can reach out via email to check if I currently have 1:1 coaching spots available. I coach via WhatsApp or 1:1 video calls. 🛎✨

    Sending you a secure, calm, empowered 2026 Where you STOP proving. STOP shrinking. And START choosing YOU.

    Love, Jula

    👇 RESOURCES 👇

    💎 Courses ✨ Stop FINALLY Obsessing Over Texts

    ➞ https://www.julanoelle.com/textanxiety

    💛 Free Stuff – 30+ resources Free Attachment Library + more offers ➞ https://linktr.ee/the.anxious.to.secure.coach/shop

    CHAPTERS:

    00:00 Introduction to Anxious Attachment and Healing 03:19 00 Delay Caffeine when you wake up 05:09 01 Check if you’re really anxiously attached 06:00 02 Define what “securely attached” means for YOU 10:02 03 Identify your most impactful areas to work on 11:35 04 Shift focus from your partner to YOU 12:57 05 Have a backup plan ready 15:30 06 Learn to self-soothe 18:03 07 Self-soothe through physical touch 19:01 08 Acts of service for yourself 20:04 09 Gifts for yourself 20:57 10 Learn to RECEIVE 22:54 11 Be consistent 23:34 12 Focus on what you can control 24:47 13 Identify core needs vs. anxious rules 26:39 14 Boundaries through action, not words 28:53 15 Reassure yourself first 29:28 16 Stop bullying yourself 30:16 17 Remove triggers & surround yourself with secure energy 31:14 18 Envision your secure self every morning 32:25 19 Name your emotions out loud 33:32 20 Do body scans 35:11 21 Pause before reactive behavior 36:15 22 Identify your real fears 37:55 23 Recognize triggers from your past 39:28 24 Prioritize YOU 40:28 25 Learn to sit in discomfort 41:54 26 Talk to your younger self

    DISCLAIMER: I'm not a therapist or doctor.

    This content is for informational and entertainment purposes only. It's not intended to diagnose, treat, or heal any mental health conditions.

    This is not meant for situations involving abusive relationships of any kind. Always seek professional advice for personal health concerns.

    Remember: Change in your relationship starts with YOU, thought by thought and action by action.

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    44 Min.
  • 116: *36 Life Lessons* Part 2 about becoming securely attached, love, relationships YOU'll need to know
    Jan 13 2026

    36 LESSONS I’VE LEARNED ABOUT LOVE, RELATIONSHIPS, ATTACHMENT & SELF-WORTH 🎙✨🖤

    This episode is for you if you’ve ever loved deeply… and lost yourself in the process 🫂💔

    👇 RESOURCES 👇

    💎 Courses ✨ Stop FINALLY Obsessing Over Texts

    ➞ https://www.the-marriage-coach.com/textanxiety

    💛 Free Stuff – 30+ resources Free Attachment Library ➞ https://linktr.ee/the.anxious.to.secure.coach/shop

    If you’ve ever: ➞ overthought every text 📱⛈ ➞ confused anxiety with intuition 🔮🚩 ➞ stayed too long because of hope 🎢 ➞ abandoned your routines, friends, or goals for love ➞ felt “too much” and “not enough” at the same time 🥶🔥

    These 36 lessons are not theory. They’re lived. Felt. Learned the hard way 💎🧠✨

    This episode is about anxious attachment, emotional safety, boundaries, self-esteem, self-worth, friendships, and secure love. Not in a perfect, polished way. But in a real, honest, nervous-system-level way 🫂🔒

    You’ll hear why secure people don’t chase, they attract. Not because they’re lucky. But because they choose themselves first 🖤✨

    You’ll learn how your body knows before your brain does. Why butterflies aren’t always a green flag. And how tight chests, knots in your stomach, and “chemistry” can actually be your past asking for attention 🚩🪞

    We talk about boundaries. Why they don’t push the right people away. Why they filter out what no longer matches your energy. And why people-pleasing was never keeping you safe in the first place 🔒✨

    You’ll hear the truth about “boring” love. Why healthy love can feel unfamiliar when chaos felt like home. And how peace becomes the most exciting thing once your nervous system learns it’s safe 🌤🧘🏼‍♀️

    This episode breaks down why chemistry without safety is often trauma bonding. Why you don’t need one soulmate. Why slow, steady connections deserve time. And how peace doesn’t mean lack of passion long-term 💛🔥

    We also talk about self-esteem. Not the fluffy kind. The real kind 💪🏽🖤

    You’ll learn why self-esteem grows through actions, not affirmations alone. Why tiny brave acts change your attachment patterns. And how choosing yourself consistently changes who chooses you 💎

    There’s also truth about growth. How you may lose people as you heal. Why that’s not a failure. And how outgrowing old dynamics is often a sign you’re finally coming back to yourself 🦋✨

    You’ll hear why love should add to your life, not become your whole life. Why interdependence beats obsession. And how missing someone doesn’t automatically mean they belong in your future 🫂🚪

    We talk about nervous system regulation. Why the same relationship feels different when YOU are regulated. Why you stop sending anxious paragraphs. Why you stop abandoning yourself first 🧠🔒

    And finally, the truth that changes everything: Hope is not a strategy. Action is.

    If something in your life isn’t working, waiting won’t fix it. Healing requires movement. Boundaries. New standards. New choices ✨💥

    This episode is a mirror. Not to judge you. But to remind you who you are 🪞🖤

    Listen if you’re ready to stop chasing love… and start choosing yourself.

    Because your healing doesn’t start with someone else changing. It starts with YOU. Thought by thought. Action by action. And one honest decision at a time

    🖤 About me I’m Jula, an attachment style coach. I help women heal trust issues, stop chasing, and build secure love ✨

    💌 Work with me ➞ All offers: https://tr.ee/PInPmy

    WhatsApp Coaching ➞ https://www.the-marriage-coach.com/textandtalk

    CHAPTERS:

    Part 02:

    00:00 intro 36 Lessons about love, attachment, self-esteem etc 00:36 lesson 19 05:04 lesson 25 10:01 lesson 30 13:05 lesson 35

    14:52 lesson 35

    DISCLAIMER: I'm not a therapist or doctor.

    This content is for informational and entertainment purposes only. It's not intended to diagnose, treat, or heal any mental health conditions.

    This is not meant for situations involving abusive relationships of any kind. Always seek professional advice for personal health concerns.

    Remember: Change in your relationship starts with YOU, thought by thought and action by action.

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    16 Min.
  • 115: *36 Life Lessons* about love, relationships Attachment
    Jan 8 2026
    This episode is for the version of you who feels like they’re behind in life… even though they’ve already survived so much 🫂⛈ If you’ve ever thought: ➞ “I should be married by now” ➞ “Everyone else has it figured out except me” ➞ “Why do I always overthink, attach, or care more?” ➞ “Why does love feel so hard when I try so much?” This episode will land DEEP 💎🧠✨ In Part 01, I’m sharing the first 18 life lessons I’ve learned about love, anxious attachment, self-esteem, self-worth, friendships, confidence, healing, and choosing yourself. Not from books. Not from theory. From LIVING it 🖤 We start with one of the most important truths: You are not behind. Even if you’re not married. Even if you don’t have the house, the kids, or the five-year plan. Even if your life doesn’t look “right” on paper 📄🚩 You’ll hear why your brain lies to you about timelines… and how comparison keeps you disconnected from your own growth 🪞 We talk about why your brain obsesses over the ONE person who doesn’t choose you… while ignoring the people who already do 💔🎢 And how anxious attachment turns “hard to get” into “must have” 🚩 You’ll learn why everything you want already exists… and how following the right blueprint changes what feels possible for you We also get real about confidence. The difference between external confidence (looks, body, validation) and real inner confidence that doesn’t disappear when no one texts back 📱🥶 You’ll hear why anxiety isn’t proof something is wrong. It’s proof your brain THINKS something is wrong 🧠🚨 And how butterflies, nerves, and intensity are not the same as love ❤️‍🔥🚩 We talk about: ✣ Why doing the same thing over and over keeps you stuck ✣ Why closure doesn’t come from them, it comes from YOU ✣ How repetition literally rewires your brain and attachment style ✣ Why self-criticism trains your nervous system to feel unsafe ✣ How self-trust is built in seconds, not years There’s a powerful reminder that one day… you’ll miss the life you’re living right now 🌤🫂 Even the “boring” days. Even the messy chapters. We talk about gratitude without bypassing pain. About how modern dating and technology have changed connection. And why slowing down your nervous system matters more than getting answers 🔒🧘🏼‍♀️ This episode also dives into: ✣ Why postponing happiness keeps you anxious ✣ Why healing is about the DAILY habits, not the end goal ✣ Why forcing love never creates safety ✣ Why anxious attachment is NOT your personality ✣ How abandonment wounds make you chase reassurance instead of safety And one of the biggest shifts: If you’ve abandoned yourself long enough, others will too. Over-giving isn’t love. It’s fear wearing a cute outfit 🫂🚩 This episode is a mirror 🪞 Not to shame you. But to remind you who you are beneath the anxiety 💎 Listen if you want to: ➞ stop chasing reassurance ➞ stop overthinking texts ➞ stop feeling “too much” ➞ and start building real emotional safety within yourself Because healing doesn’t start with fixing your partner. It starts with choosing yourself. Again. And again. And again 🖤✨ 🎧 After listening, tell me: Which lesson hit you in the chest the most? And which one are you ready to LIVE next? Lots of love 🫶 I see you. And I’ll see you in Part 02 ✨🎙 👇 RESOURCES 👇 💎 Courses ✨ Stop FINALLY Obsessing Over Texts ➞ https://www.the-marriage-coach.com/textanxiety 💛 Free Stuff – 30+ resources Free Attachment Library ➞ https://linktr.ee/the.anxious.to.secure.coach/shop 🖤 About me I’m Jula, an attachment style coach. I help women heal trust issues, stop chasing, and build secure love ✨ 💌 Work with me ➞ All offers: https://tr.ee/PInPmy WhatsApp Coaching ➞ https://www.the-marriage-coach.com/textandtalk CHAPTER: 00:00 Celebrating 36 Years: A Journey of Lessons 01:15 lesson 01 03:36 lesson 02 04:18 lesson 03 05:18 lesson 04 06:17 lesson 05 07:19 lesson 06 07:47 lesson 07 08:12 lesson 08 08:55 lesson 09 09:58 lesson 10 11:29 lesson 11 13:59 lesson 12 16:12 lesson 13 17:06 lesson 14 17:34 lesson 15 18:05 lesson 16 19:38 lesson 17 20:52 lesson 18 DISCLAIMER: I'm not a therapist or doctor. This content is for informational and entertainment purposes only. It's not intended to diagnose, treat, or heal any mental health conditions. This is not meant for situations involving abusive relationships of any kind. Always seek professional advice for personal health concerns. Remember: Change in your relationship starts with YOU, thought by thought and action by action.
    Mehr anzeigen Weniger anzeigen
    23 Min.
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