In this guided mini episode of Stay Mindful with Dr. Evelyn Davis, we use a simple cake metaphor to explore how healthy relationships are built—one ingredient at a time. Drawing from attachment theory and the Relationship Attachment Model (RAM), listeners are invited to reflect on the five bonding areas: Know, Trust, Rely, Commit, and Closeness. This short practice offers space to slow down, notice attachment patterns, and build more intentional, balanced connections—without shame, pressure, or perfection.

Resources

Companion Tool

• Davis, E. (2025). RAM Relationship Reflection Worksheet Adapted from the Relationship Attachment Model by Dr. John Van Epp

Relationship Attachment Model (RAM)

• Van Epp, L. J. (2006). How to Avoid Falling in Love with a Jerk.
• Van Epp, L. J., & Cutlip, M. V. E. (2015). Relationship Attachment Model (RAM).

Attachment & Reflection

• Mikulincer, M., & Shaver, P. R. (2016). Attachment in Adulthood.
• Levine, A., & Heller, R. (2010). Attached.

Disclaimer

This mini episode is intended as a reflective practice and does not replace professional mental health care.

Why do we keep repeating the same relationship dynamics—even when we know better? In this episode, we explore attachment and the Relationship Attachment Model (RAM) developed by Dr. John Van Epp, PhD. We’ll talk about how relationships form, how early attachment experiences shape our patterns, and how the five areas of bonding influence the way we show up in our relationships. Through mindful reflection, we unpack old habits, emotional triggers, and opportunities for healthier connection.

Resources & References

Attachment Theory & Adult Relationships

• Bowlby, J. (1969/1982). Attachment and Loss: Vol. 1. Attachment.
• Ainsworth, M. D. S., et al. (1978). Patterns of Attachment.
• Hazan, C., & Shaver, P. R. (1990). Love and work: An attachment-theoretical perspective.
• Mikulincer, M., & Shaver, P. R. (2016). Attachment in Adulthood.
• Levine, A., & Heller, R. (2010). Attached.

Relationship Attachment Model (RAM)

• Van Epp, L. J. (2006). How to Avoid Falling in Love with a Jerk.
• Van Epp, L. J., & Cutlip, M. V. E. (2015). Relationship Attachment Model (RAM): PICK and LINKS programs.

Mindfulness & Emotional Awareness

• Kabat-Zinn, J. (2003). Mindfulness-based interventions in context.
• Siegel, D. J. (2010). Mindsight.
• Neff, K. (2011). Self-Compassion.

Disclaimer

This episode is intended as a reflective practice and does not replace professional mental health care.

Self-care is not a one-time reset—it’s an ongoing practice that adapts as life changes.

In this episode, we focus on how to sustain your self-care beyond awareness and intention. You’ll be guided through how to use your Self-Care Action Plan as a living tool, build a personalized self-care toolbox (linked here), and evaluate what actually supports your well-being in daily life.

This episode is about moving from insight to consistency—without pressure or perfection.