Today I went to a virtual workshop held by the Serenity House of Leesburg. It was called “Surfing the Wave: How to manage urges and strong emotions in recovery.” I focused on my emotional urges. The workshop helped me see that some of my old alcoholic thinking still lingers in subtle ways. When I hear about tragedy, I tend to sink into sadness and imagine the person’s suffering as if it were my own. I used to think that was empathy, but it’s really a form of isolation that feeds my depression. The trainer said something that stuck with me about how isolation reinforces my sadness. When I don’t talk about how I feel, I’m telling myself that what I feel is correct and doesn’t need to change. Recognizing that is the first step toward change. And nothing is going to change between my ears unless I change it.

What I learned is that emotional triggers can become training opportunities if I let them. Naming what I feel releases it instead of letting it bounce back and forth in my head like a ping pong ball. Talking, visualizing, or stepping outside gives the pain somewhere to go. I don’t need to relive someone else’s pain to honor their story. As much as I know that intellectually, emotionally I have to work at it.

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Visit my Etsy shop, and join my creative journey at Recovery Upcycling. https://www.etsy.com/shop/RecoveryUpcycling

To learn more about vestibular disorders visit https://vestibular.org

#recoveryjourney #emotionalhealing #sobrietytools #selfawareness #mentalhealthrecovery #serenityinprogress #alcoholrecovery #healingmindset #spiritualgrowth #livingawake

For most of my life, I mourned the loss of a friend who died in a motorcycle accident the year I graduated high school. I thought I was grieving, but I was stuck in the shadows of that loss for a very long time. I cried without processing anything. I didn’t truly grieve his death until I got sober at 42. As a teenager, I was already hormonally irrational; add alcohol, and it tipped me into chaos. Drinking kept me numb enough to avoid the full weight of loss, yet clear enough to sit in the misery of it. I mistook suffering for healing and believed that the more I cried, the more I was honoring his life. I refused to move on, circling the same sadness for over twenty years, mourning but never truly grieving.

A few years ago, I lost a lifelong friend I’d known since fifth grade. He died from alcoholism. For a year and a half, I couldn’t listen to music without breaking down. Eventually, I had to move the grief. I put on my running shoes, went to the local sportsplex, and ran until I was out of tears while I blasted music in my ears. That’s when I truly grieved. It was painful and almost unbearable, but it moved through me.

In sobriety, grief transforms loss into gratitude for the love I shared. I used to believe that part of me was taken with those I lost. Now I know part of them stays with me, and that can’t be taken away. The ability to grieve is a gift that I didn’t always have. Sobriety has taught me how to live through grief.

Listen and subscribe wherever you get your podcasts and YouTube.

Rather listen on Apple Podcasts? https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/recovery-daily-podcast/id1693924779

Visit my Etsy shop, and join my creative journey at Recovery Upcycling. https://www.etsy.com/shop/RecoveryUpcycling

To learn more about vestibular disorders visit https://vestibular.org

#griefandhealing #soberliving #recoveryjourney #emotionalsobriety #healingthroughloss #sobergratitude #lifeafterloss #selfreflection #growththroughgrief #recoverydaily

Slowing down has been a gift of my stroke recovery, and I learned it through sobriety. I used to move so fast that I never noticed much around me other than that which I was trying to change. I miss moving fast because slowing down isn’t optional anymore. It’s necessary for my recovery and to minimize my daily head pain. But, through the stillness and quiet, I’ve learned to savor it, being fully present in moments that used to slip by me.

Emotional sobriety taught me how to know my limitations without letting them defeat or define me. I try not to identify as broken anymore. I try to identify with the possibilities that come after hardship. I felt an overwhelming sense of gratitude last night sitting in a sobriety meeting in my new neighborhood. I saw faces that were still strangers but would soon become family. Overtime each person’s shared experience will add truth to understanding my own.

Listen and subscribe wherever you get your podcasts and YouTube.

Rather listen on Apple Podcasts? https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/recovery-daily-podcast/id1693924779

Visit my Etsy shop, and join my creative journey at Recovery Upcycling. https://www.etsy.com/shop/RecoveryUpcycling

To learn more about vestibular disorders visit https://vestibular.org

#recoveryjourney #savoringstillness #emotionalSobriety #strokeRecovery #sobrietyjourney #mindfulhealing #livingpresent #growththroughrecovery #gratitudepractice #healingthroughfaith