Episode 12: Many of us have been chased away from shame, because it seems to cause nothing but pain.

However, shame itself is a crucial social emotion that helps you become an upright and empathic person who cares about others and has a strong sense of ethics.

The key to working with shame is to understand the difference between shame that helps you maintain your morals and ethics, and shame-blame that is thrown onto you by others. The blaming form of shame is actually, and simply, abuse.

Reclaiming your own true and healing shame is crucial in a time when people are flinging shame-blame everywhere.

In this episode, we begin to observe how people's tragic avoidance of shame, and their lust for throwing shame-blame at others, is damaging our capacity to learn, grow, connect, evolve, and heal.

Your own chosen shame forms the center of your ethical core. It's essential. And a key to working well with shame is to understand the difference between shame and abuse.

Books and practices mentioned in this episode:

The Language of Emotions by Karla McLaren: https://karlamclaren.com/the-language-of-emotions-book/

The Burning Contracts practice for shame: https://karlamclaren.com/reworking-a-toxic-emotion/

Strangers in Their Own Land by Arlie Russell Hochschild: https://bookshop.org/p/books/strangers-in-their-own-land-anger-and-mourning-on-the-american-right-arlie-russell-hochschild/85585abfe16c457f

Stolen Pride by Arlie Russell Hochschild: https://bookshop.org/p/books/stolen-pride-loss-shame-and-the-rise-of-the-right-arlie-russell-hochschild/645bfe0a64abb5be

Mistakes Were Made (but not by me) by Carol Tavris and Elliot Aronson: https://bookshop.org/p/books/mistakes-were-made-but-not-by-me-third-edition-why-we-justify-foolish-beliefs-bad-decisions-and-hurtful-acts-carol-tavris/507560a2efd55431