The nightmares felt real enough to kill me — dying on the job, over and over. I'd wake up and not know if I was still alive. And I told nobody. That's what we do.

For years I was running — from God, from commitment, from the version of myself I was too ashamed to admit existed. I had a pornography addiction nobody knew about. I was terrified of marriage. And I had enough anger locked inside me to destroy every relationship I had.

I thought I had it under control. I didn't.It wasn't one dramatic altar moment that changed me. It was a stranger on the job who told me to read the New Testament. It was the parable of the Prodigal Son that cracked something open in me I couldn't shut back. And it was a room full of men — through the Conquer Series — who were finally willing to tell the truth out loud.In this video I share:

-The tormenting dreams that made me afraid to close my eyes

-How isolation on the job made my mind my worst enemy

-The moment a complete stranger on duty pointed me toward Scripture

-Why the Prodigal Son story broke through when nothing else did

-How I found my first real community of men through the Conquer Series

Almost 2 years free from pornography — and what that actually cost me

How I went from terrified of marriage to building a family on something real

If you're a cop, a first responder, or any man carrying something in silence — I made this for you. You don't have to figure it out alone.

🔔 Subscribe for weekly conversations with cops and first responders finding purpose beyond the badge.

🔗 Resources Mentioned:

Conquer Series: https://www.conquerseries.com

Shelter Rock Church: https://shelterrockchurch.churchcenter.com/home

📲 Connect with Lenny:

Instagram – https://www.instagram.com/purposeoverpension/

TikTok – https://www.tiktok.com/@purposeoverpension?_t=ZP-8yvXjeYqxSg&_r=1

Facebook – https://www.facebook.com/lenny.bradley.12/

Email: contact@purposeoverpension.com#purposeoverpension

#PoliceFaith #CopTestimony #ChristianCops #LawEnforcement #MenOfFaith #ConquerSeries #FirstResponders #PoliceLife #PoliceMentalHealth

Phabian Winfield went viral — but the attention came at one of the darkest times in his life.

In this episode, he shares how music, pressure, faith, and his career in Homeland Security all collided to reveal a deeper purpose.
In this episode of Purpose Over Pension, Phabian opens up about the viral music video that put his name in front of the world — and the emotional, spiritual, and personal weight that came with it behind the scenes.

What looked like a breakthrough on the outside came during a season marked by pressure, inner conflict, and bigger questions about identity, purpose, and calling.

Phabian shares his journey through music, the impact of going viral, and how that moment forced him to confront what success really meant. He also talks about his path into Homeland Security / U.S. Customs and Border Protection, how that opportunity came after rejection elsewhere, and how both worlds — public attention and federal service — shaped the man he became.

This conversation is about more than music and more than the badge.
It's about what happens when visibility, pain, ambition, and faith all meet at the same time — and how purpose can be built in the middle of it.
In this episode, we cover:

-Phabian's viral music video and how it impacted him personally
-The hidden pressure that comes with sudden visibility
-His journey through music and entertainment
-Depression, spiritual warfare, and inner conflict
-His career in Homeland Security / CBP
-How rejection and redirection helped him find purpose

If you've ever had a moment that looked big on the outside but felt heavy on the inside, this episode will resonate with you.

📲 Follow Phabian Winfield:
YouTube: @officialsquire
Instagram: @officialsquire @themakingofamoment @ritenowmuzic_
Facebook: The Making Of A Moment
Website:http://www.rightnowmusic.com/

📲 Connect with Me
Instagram – https://www.instagram.com/purposeoverpension/
TikTok – https://www.tiktok.com/@purposeoverpension?_t=ZP-8yvXjeYqxSg&_r=1
Facebook – https://www.facebook.com/lenny.bradley.12/
Email: contact@purposeoverpension.com

🎧 Listen Only (Podcast) Description

What happens when a teenager raises half a million dollars, loses it all, and ends up facing 15 federal charges before he's old enough to buy a drink?

Ian Bic found out the hard way.

In this raw and unfiltered episode, Ian walks us through the rise and fall — from promoting school dances to running a concert scheme that spiraled into a full federal investigation involving the FBI, IRS, and postal inspectors. He talks about the moment his business partner flipped for an immunity deal, leaving Ian to take the full weight of a 3-year federal sentence alone.

But this isn't just a cautionary tale. It's a blueprint for what comes after.

Ian shares what life inside federal prison is really like — the politics, the extortion, the assault by a guard that TikTok wouldn't let him forget — and what it took to rebuild from nothing. Working at Whole Foods. Living on an ankle monitor. Swallowing his pride every single day.

Then one video about solitary confinement went viral. And everything changed.

Today Ian runs a content brand with nearly 500,000 YouTube subscribers. His "Purpose Over Pension" moment? Walking away from the steady paycheck to bet on himself.

If you've ever felt like your past disqualifies you from your future — this one's for you.

🎙️ Topics Covered:

• The concert scheme that became a Ponzi structure
• Navigating federal prison with zero street credibility
• Betrayal, loyalty, and the cost of taking the rap
• Building a content empire from a prison story
• Why authenticity beats strategy every time

Follow Ian on

YouTube: @Ian Bick

Instagram: @IanBick

TikTok:@IanBick

Website: http://www.ianbick.com

Qwell grew up in Bedstuy, Brooklyn — watching his uncle cycle in and out of Rikers Island. One of those same uncles told him to become a cop. He listened.

What followed was a career that took him through the chaos of Rikers as a Correctional Officer, to a federal facility where the rules were completely different, and eventually to the set of 60 Days In — where he spent 100 days locked inside a Utah jail, undercover, as an inmate.

In this conversation, Qwell breaks down what most people will never understand about life inside — the difference between federal and Rikers, how inmates are trained to see officers as nothing more than a paycheck, and what it actually costs mentally and personally to do this work when your own family can't fully understand what you're carrying.

He also gets real about the NYPD rejection that redirected his entire career, the moment an inmate threatened his family, and what 100 days undercover revealed about justice, identity, and purpose.

This episode is for every officer who has ever felt underestimated, overlooked, or like the system forgot about them. Qwell's story is proof that your path doesn't have to look the way you planned for it to mean something.

Purpose Over Pension is a podcast for law enforcement officers navigating the tension between the badge and the life they want on the other side of it. Hosted by retired NYPD Detective Lenny Bradley, every episode is a real conversation with people who've been in the fire — and found a way through.

Subscribe on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, and wherever you listen.

What happens when a cop realizes the pension isn't enough?

Joel V. De La Cruz grew up in the Bronx, joined the Suffolk County

Police Department in 2016, and spent years watching fellow officers

sleep at the precinct — not because of the mission, but because of

the money. It scared him straight into real estate.

In this episode of Purpose Over Pension, Joel gets brutally honest

about the financial trap that keeps good officers stuck in jobs that

are slowly grinding them down. He shares how he built a 7-property

portfolio using creative finance strategies — no traditional bank

required — while working full-time in law enforcement, and how that

income gave his wife the freedom to walk away from the NYPD at 28.

Joel doesn't sugarcoat it. He talks about paying $10,000 for a

mentorship that didn't deliver, having a business partner steal a

deal right out from under him, and the two years he wasted being

inconsistent — until his son was born and everything changed.

If you're a first responder who feels financially locked in,

this episode is for you.

Sergeant Brian Williams spent 19 years with the Norfolk Police Department — starting

in patrol, moving into Special Crimes, and eventually leading a unit that handled

some of the darkest cases imaginable: crimes against children, sex crimes, domestic

violence. Before that, he was a Marine. NBC defense. One tour in Iraq.

He was good at the job. He was a servant leader who vouched for his team, who

took on evidence paperwork so his detectives could focus on investigations, who

helped a burned-out officer named Jen find her way out of a unit that was consuming her.

But in October 2025, his captain denied a pre-planned vacation with his son and told

him the organization comes first. Brian retired three months later.

In this conversation, Brian takes us inside the moments that defined his career and

his choice to leave it: policing the streets he grew up on in Norfolk, Virginia;

the horrific domestic case where a victim's dog was the key to saving her life;

the faith-driven conversation with his wife about forgiving the unforgivable; and

the $67,000 military time buyback decision that let him walk out on his own terms.

He didn't leave empty-handed. In December 2021 — three years before retirement —

he co-founded Pinnacle TCI, a training and consulting company now operating in

20+ states. Purpose didn't wait for his pension. And neither did he.

Guest: Brian Williams | Co-Founder, Pinnacle TCI | Retired Norfolk PD Sergeant

Connect: @real_brianw | www.pinnacletci.com

Purpose Over Pension is a podcast for law enforcement officers figuring out who they

are beyond the badge.

He survived the shooting – but it was what happened after that almost broke him.

In this raw conversation, retired NYPD cop Steve Padullo opens up about the 12-year career that changed him, the shooting that put a bullet 18 inches from his head, and the brutal truth that "the job will never love you back."

If you're a cop quietly falling apart behind the badge, or wondering if there is life after the force, this episode is for you. Steve's journey from the "lion's den" of East New York to finding spiritual wealth and a new purpose in celebrity protection proves that the pension isn't the only prize at the end of the road.

In this episode, we cover:

The hidden mental toll of doing it "by the book" while the system plays the numbers game.

The reality of the "Man with a Gun" call that changed everything.

Why waiting to ask for help almost cost Steve his future.

What PTSD really looks like years after the smoke clears.

How to build an identity and mission beyond the shield.

🚨 Need help finding your purpose after the force?

Subscribe for more honest conversations about life after law enforcement: https://www.youtube.com/@PurposeOverPension?sub_confirmation=1

🔗 CONNECT WITH STEVE:

Instagram: @Steven_Michael_2637

Twitter: @Steve_the_RET_cop

TikTok: @Steve_the_RET_comp

📲 Connect with Me

Instagram – https://www.instagram.com/purposeoverpension/

TikTok – https://www.tiktok.com/@purposeoverpension?_t=ZP-8yvXjeYqxSg&_r=1

Facebook – https://www.facebook.com/lenny.bradley.12/

My Father was a heroin trafficker who played cards with John Gotti in prison. Then I became an NYPD Detective.

In this episode of Purpose Over Pension, I sit down with retired NYPD Detective Eli Slavkin to discuss one of the most ironic law enforcement stories you will ever hear.

At 10 years old, Eli watched the DEA kick in his front door. He grew up visiting his father in federal prison and hated the police for most of his youth.

Yet, he eventually took the oath and earned his gold shield.

We dive deep into the internal conflict of policing, the temptation of corruption when you're broke, and how to find purpose after the badge. If you are a first responder looking for your "Plan B" or just love gritty true crime stories, this interview is for you.

🔥 In this episode, we cover:

-The trauma of a DEA raid from a child's perspective.

--The surreal experience of seeing John Gotti in prison.

-Why Eli hated 75% of the cops he worked with initially.

-The "dirty cop" temptation: How close Eli came to taking a bribe.

-Navigating life and identity after retiring from the NYPD.

👇 JOIN THE CONVERSATION:

Did your upbringing influence your career choice? Let me know in the comments!

Connect with Eli:

📷 Instagram: @loyalistical

📲 Connect with Me

Instagram – https://www.instagram.com/purposeoverpension/

TikTok – https://www.tiktok.com/@purposeoverpension?_t=ZP-8yvXjeYqxSg&_r=1

Facebook – https://www.facebook.com/lenny.bradley.12/