Send us a text

How we treat ourselves—our self-talk, our self-criticism, and the attributions we make about our emotional state—is one of the most significant determining factors that affects our emotional well-being and our functioning in life. Over the course of three seasons of Peace, Love, & Psychology podcasts, we have discussed how to understand and address issues such as emotions, cognitions, trauma, relationship patterns, communication, forgiveness, and more. This episode focuses on what is often the missing ingredient in breaking free of negative patterns and beginning to experience healing on a deeper, lasting level: unlocking the true potential of our imagination.

First, we review the role that emotions and cognition play in providing crucial feedback about our needs and desires in real time. We discuss how we can tap into the information our feelings provide about what might be missing or going wrong in our lives. We discuss how we can identify repetitive thoughts in order to better understand ourselves.

Next, we explore how unexpressed emotion and undisciplined thinking often work together to create and perpetuate unhealthy patterns in our lives. We discuss how this interaction leads to a narrowing of our viewpoint, creates a false sense of control and mastery, and leads us to shut the door on possible solutions. We examine why recovery from any number of problematic habits often starts with admitting that we may not have all the answers, By approaching our predicament with humility, we open ourselves up to fresh perspectives and input, paving the way toward freedom from old patterns.

Finally, we discuss the critical role that our imagination plays in breaking free from negative cycles. In our modern culture, imagination is often seen as a childish activity that is synonymous with escapism and distraction. We dig into the roots of imagination as a concept in order to unleash the enormous potential power for positive change it offers. We highlight some practical applications in order to harness the power of your imagination for positive change

By cultivating a deeper understanding of and appreciation for the potential contained in our imagination, we can leverage this gift to break through unhealthy patterns, bring balance to our emotions and cognitions, and finally fix our broken relationship with ourselves.

Support the show

Thank you for listening!

Please subscribe and share with your friends.

Recorded and edited at Studio 970West, Grand Junction, CO.

CLICK HERE to support Peace, Love, & Psychology Podcast.

Send us a text

A very common issue many of us struggle with is the apparent conflict between our logical minds and our feelings. There are times when the tension between what we think is logical or right and what we feel is like a perpetual tug-of-war. In this episode, we discuss the classic struggle between head and heart.

We begin by discussing the dimensions of the conflict. We explore how we might know that a particular course of action is the right thing to do, but we struggle with desires or feelings that oppose that course of action. The result is an internal conflict that often leaves us doubting and second-guessing ourselves no matter which path we choose. We examine how this internal struggle can lead to conflict in our relationships. When emotion overrules logic, we might say or do things that can lead to hurting others and feeling guilty. When logic overrules our emotions, we sometimes run the risk of building up resentments toward other people.

In order to make peace within ourselves, many instinctively choose to side either with logic or emotion. Unforntunetly, neither of these strategies lead to internal peace or interpersonal harmony in the long run. There are negative consequences to choosing sides and using a winner-take-all approach.

The answer to ending the war between logic and emotion is to replace this broken either-or model with a more accurate and useful model. We must understand the proper role and function of systematic thinking, and we must contrast this with an understanding of the proper role and function of emotions. This understanding helps us see how the two faculties are designed to provide us with different tools for grasping and navigating reality.

With a proper understanding of each, we can learn to use our executive functioning to integrate our logical mind with our emotions. By learning and practicing the skill using our executive function, we become better at listening to our feelings and integrating that information into our decision-making process.

A deeper understanding that appreciates the differences between systematic thinking and feelings can empower us to make better use of each faculty, leading to an improved ability to make decisions and bringing a lasting peace between our mind and our heart.

Support the show

Thank you for listening!

Please subscribe and share with your friends.

Recorded and edited at Studio 970West, Grand Junction, CO.

CLICK HERE to support Peace, Love, & Psychology Podcast.

Send us a text

The issue of narcissism has found its way into the culture as a popular topic in the realm of intimate relationships, work relationships, and family dynamics. In this episode, we examine the topic from the perspective of what it means to be parented by someone with narcissistic traits.

We begin our exploration with an overview of what narcissism is. We review the criteria in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders that determine whether or not an individual meets the standard to be diagnosed with Narcissistic Personality Disorder. We then discuss where narcissism fits within the spectrum of human development over the lifespan and highlight periods in a normal life where people might be excessively focused on themselves. We will briefly touch on the role narcissism plays in psychopathy and the 'Dark Triad' before examining the root that underlies the very concept of narcissism, the Myth of Narcissus. This first part of our journey brings us to a more useful way to approach the topic of being parented by a narcissist by clarifying its functional definition.

Armed with a working framework, we then turn the conversation toward characteristics that accompany being raised by a narcissistic parent. When a parent is excessively focused on their own needs over the needs of their children, certain patterns emerge. First, we look at typical behaviors that a parent with these traits will engage in as they raise children. All parents will make mistakes during child-raising, but parents with narcissistic behaviors tend to fail at effective parenting in certain predictable ways. We look at seven of the most common ways a narcissistic parent can hamper healthy childhood development. Second, we look at how these typical, maladaptive parenting behaviors can affect an adult who was raised by a narcissistic parent. We discuss several characteristic outcomes we may face in adulthood when one or both of our parents suffered from narcissistic traits and behaviors.

Finally, we turn to consideration of the key domains that are often a focus in psychotherapy with an adult who was raised by a narcissistic parent. These areas represent normal developmental milestones and the key information and skill sets that the adult child of a narcissistic parent may have missed out on. It is encouraging that, as healing begins in any one of these domains, it has a positive effect on all of the other areas. Recovery can be swift and profound as a person learns to incorporate new understanding and an effective set of skills. As an adult, a person can access a rich array of resource materials on how to cope with having been raised narcissistic parent and begin their healing journey on their own or in psychotherapy with a trusted professional.

Even those adults who were exposed to the most toxic levels of narcissistic parenting can learn to navigate life challenges and relationships with more confidence and experience greater freedom and joy in life.

Support the show

Thank you for listening!

Please subscribe and share with your friends.

Recorded and edited at Studio 970West, Grand Junction, CO.

CLICK HERE to support Peace, Love, & Psychology Podcast.