#80: Massimo Backus, author of "Human First, Leader Second," shares his transformative journey from high-achieving "sage on the stage" to authentic leader through the power of self-compassion.

Key Moments:

The Wake-Up Call - Massimo was running global leadership development when devastating 360 feedback revealed he was defensive, didn't create psychological safety, and was even described as a bully - the opposite of his intentions.

The Epiphany - After surrendering to the Hoffman Process, Massimo experienced his first moment of unconditional self-love in the woods - realizing he'd spent his life hiding doubts and imposter syndrome behind a "leadership costume."

The Power of the Pause - Why rushing from one role to the next keeps us stuck - and how the "neutral zone" allows for healing and repatterning.

Powerful Quotes:

"We wake up most days trying to be someone we already are."

"Courage is the small things: taking good care of yourself, setting boundaries, asking for help."

"I had to fully surrender - give up all the coping mechanisms and parts of my identity that on paper worked."

Key Takeaways:

• Self-compassion isn't soft - it takes courage to confront yourself authentically
• Internal validation is sustainable; external validation keeps you off-balance
• Emotions are data points, not definitions
• Transition periods are opportunities, not just gaps to fill quickly

Resources:

• Human First, Leader Second by Massimo Bacchus
• Brené Brown's Atlas of the Heart
• Dr. Kristin Neff's self-compassion research
• The Hoffman Process

Connect with Massimo:

• Website: mass@massimobackus.com
• LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/massimo-backus/
• Instagram: @massismoleadership

Connect with The Courage Effect:

• Host: Suzanne Weller / Weller Collaboration
• Website: https://wellercollaboration.com/thecourageeffect
• Social Media: https://linktr.ee/suzanneweller
• Substack: Sign up for Suzanne’s Reimagine Growth newsletter at https://suzanneweller.substack.com/about

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