Play therapist Ashlie West went into children's mental health because, in her words, kids are easier than adults. A graduate school mentor asked her one question that changed that: what happens after the session, when the child goes back to the same world?

In this conversation, Ashlie and Elizabeth talk about what that question taught her. They get into what constant screens are doing to children's attention and mood, why behavior change often gets worse before it gets better, and why a dysregulated parent cannot parent a dysregulated child into calm.

Ashlie explains how play works as a child's first language, what a single sand tray can reveal that a child cannot say out loud, and why she brings parents into the work from the second appointment. Along the way, both women admit how hard it is to put the phone down, to play without an agenda, and to apologize to a kid.

The takeaway is steady and hopeful: if parents can accidentally teach a child something unhelpful, they can intentionally teach something better.

Lee Anne is a fundraising consultant, a stand-up comic, and a woman who spent years believing she had to handle her hardest moment alone. In this conversation, she shares publicly for the first time the story of a miscarriage at six weeks, just after moving to North Carolina in 2014.

She describes telling her husband to stay at work, driving home alone through a KFC drive-through, and going back to the office on Thursday as if nothing had happened. She did not tell her mother until after her son was born. Looking back, she names what she was protecting: the belief that she was good at everything, and that this was a personal failure.

The conversation moves from grief to anger, including a very sincere apology to Carrie Underwood, and then to the difference between being private and being secretive. Lee Anne makes the case that the people who love us have earned the right to worry about us, and that shame cannot survive in community. If you are carrying something no one knows about, this episode is an invitation to let someone walk with you.

What does it actually feel like to love a foster child you may have to give back? In this episode, Loren shares her journey from a late-night application as a single woman to adopting her son, welcoming three siblings on a couple hours' notice, and learning to love both the children and the parents who needed her.

Host Elizabeth Porter and Loren talk openly about attachment, grief, and the idea that someone always loses in foster care. Loren explains why she was completely attached to her first placement, how she supported a grieving three-year-old through nights on the floor, and what it meant to be a real person cheering on the biological parents rather than a threat to them. She also looks back on what she would do differently, especially in preparing her adopted son for reunifications, and why she still believes the hardest parts of fostering are worth it.

If you are a foster parent, thinking about becoming one, or supporting someone who is, this conversation offers a rare and honest look at what it means to live in tension.

If this episode meant something to you, subscribe so you never miss a conversation, and share it with someone who needs to hear it.

For more adoption and foster care resources, reach out to NOOL Counseling.

Learn more about our show sponsor, Porter Law Group, here.