Going Back to Work After Loss
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The hardest calendar invite is the one that pulls you back to work after a death. Your world has changed, yet the inbox still fills, the meetings still stack, and people don’t know whether to talk about it—or avoid it. In this conversation with Erin Nelson and Colleen Montague from Jessica’s House, we sit with the truth that you’re not the same person, and work needs to meet you where you are.
Erin shares her story of stepping away after her son Carter died and returning in phases, naming the clunky handoffs, the new workplace dynamics, and how grief reshapes leadership and teamwork. We unpack what many grieving parents experience: cognitive fog, surges of emotion during routine tasks, and the quiet relief of colleagues who check in without prying. Together we map practical steps to make re-entry kinder—looping in HR early, exploring family leave, proposing flexible schedules, and setting simple agreements with supervisors and peers so you don’t have to carry unspoken expectations.
You’ll hear grounded tools you can use the moment you’re back at your desk or on the floor: sensory grounding to find the present in a hard meeting, short “reset” lists you can keep nearby, and how a designated private space—a car, a quiet room, a “cry closet”—can help you release pressure without shame. We talk about distinguishing intrusive thoughts from the steady ache of grief and why brief logic tasks, like a quick game of Tetris, can interrupt re-traumatization. We also lean into body-based care: hydration, crunchy or cold snacks that wake you up, warmth and weight to calm your system, peer proofreading for foggy days, and micro-rest that supports sleep when nights are broken.
Whether you’re a nurse with no spare minute, a teacher without a private office, or a manager navigating your team’s uncertainty, this episode offers adaptable ideas and language to ask for what you need. If your workplace isn’t sure how to help, bring them this playbook. Subscribe for more compassionate conversations on parenting through loss, share this with someone returning to work after bereavement, and leave a review to tell us what practices steadied you.
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For more information on Jessica’s House or for additional resources, please go to jessicashouse.org
