Instead of the usual attempted dissection of a blockbuster, this week the trio are digging into a stocking full of listener questions. It’s a barmy festive special where innocent inquiries spiral into sheer madness.

Join Ad, as he educates the room on the concept of "deuteragonist"; a term Amber is convinced is entirely made up until she’s proven hilariously wrong.

Bailey, meanwhile, vents his frustration with heroes who are oblivious to scheming side-characters, while championing those who transition from push-arounds to unstoppable beasts.

Amber, on the other hand, presents her strict criteria for what defines "festive cinema," with an actual presentation at hand. We also learn of her earliest special interest; one that's less concerned with celluloid and more to do with hydraulic brushes often found at your local carwash.

Feeling the holiday spirit? Then grab your baubles and jingle on over to our Discord grotto, TikTok workshop, and Instagram wonderland.

Music used in this episode:

“⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Wardrobe MalfunKtion” by Danya Vodovoz⁠

Fasten your seatbelts and ground yourselves, dear Critters, for we are about to embark on quite the crash landing. That's right, we are engaging our distress beacons and plummeting straight toward Will Smith and M. Night Shyamalan’s planet-sized catastrophe, After Earth.

Do you despise this movie? In which case, you have found your sanctuary. We're serving up a healthy balance of unfiltered hate and outright absurdity that will leave you feeling more satisfied than an Ursa at an empath convention.

Join Amber as she attempts to 'ghost' her own cravings, contemplating whether a static-laden Life Suit is the ultimate solution to her current dietary quarrels. Ad, meanwhile, keeps his pyrotechnic skullduggery to a minimum this week. Instead, he dreams up a new service that is as erotic as it is lucrative. Bailey, on the other hand, has visions of a Life Suit modification that might be a social miracle for the gang, even if it risks rendering one of Ad's special abilities well and truly redundant.

Survived the fateful landing? Then race through the Instagram jungle, climb the TikTok volcano, and hit that emergency beacon to signal rescue from the Discord dropship, where you'll be well and truly safe from Big Willie's weekend madness.

Music used in this episode:

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠“30-second Epic Trailer music” by Cinematic Music⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

⁠"Dreamer" by Danya Vodovoz⁠

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠“Free News Intro” by Free Motion Graphics Background Animation⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

“⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Wardrobe MalfunKtion” by Danya Vodovoz⁠

Prepare yourself, gorgeous Critters, for this week the Ctrl Alt Critique crew are resisting eviction and plugging themselves into Matthew Robbins' 1987 sci-fi fantasy, Batteries Not Included.

Join the trio for some high-voltage absurdity. Bailey reveals his twisted blueprint on how to deter Mr Lacey's contractors, pitching a disturbing method of getting the adorable 'Fix-its' to execute some unwitting surgery on their victims. Ad, meanwhile, maps out his own defence plan, drafting up a concept for an R-rated Home Alone scenario designed to give Lacey's thugs a truly visceral reception. Amber somehow manages to short-circuit her dating fantasies, managing to turn a heart warming romance into a personal nightmare of rejection and eternal loneliness.

Enjoying your time in the Ctrl Alt Critique work shed? Then assemble your parts and swoosh on over to our ⁠Discord⁠ ⁠Demolition Site, ⁠TikTok ⁠Toolbox, and ⁠Instagram Roof Hut.

Music used in this episode:

“30-second Epic Trailer music” by Cinematic Music⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

⁠⁠"Dreamer" by Danya Vodovoz⁠⁠

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠“Free News Intro” by Free Motion Graphics Background Animation⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

⁠⁠“Wardrobe MalfunKtion” by Danya Vodovoz⁠

Sharpen those fangs, perfect your most brooding of stares, and try not to break any treaties while you’re at it. That’s right, lovely Critters, Ctrl Alt Critique is emerging from the misty forests of Forks for a third time!

Amber, Ad, and Bailey are sinking their teeth into the 2010 cultural phenomenon, The Twilight Saga: Eclipse, and as is tradition, they are not alone! This week, they’re joined by special guest, Bailey’s sister and Twilight aficionado, Sammie, to help them take on the menacing new born army.

Join the coven for some super-human hullabaloo. Amber opens up about her tragic past as a 1940s Telford detective. Ad, meanwhile, educates the gang on an antiquated communication method involving armoured pigeons. Bailey muses on the perfect vampire power, settling on energy absorption and accidently pitching himself as a sparkly Kirby. Sammie weighs in on her desired gift; the power to hack empires, excel at her day job, and potentially turn herself into an accidental demi-god.

Enjoying the brooding down at the clearing? Why not sprint over to our Discord den, track the scent to our Instagram imprinting reservation, and lurk with us on the TikTok treaty line.

Music used in this episode:

“30-second Epic Trailer music” by Cinematic Music⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

“Adagio for Strings” by Samuel Barber

⁠"Dreamer" by Danya Vodovoz⁠

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠“Free News Intro” by Free Motion Graphics Background Animation⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

“Medieval Song Village Consort” by Always Music

“Noir 1” by Pedro

⁠“Wardrobe MalfunKtion” by Danya Vodovoz⁠

Scrub down your intravehicular medical garments, secure the lab, and prepare for quarantine, because Ctrl Alt Critique is capturing a new specimen this week! That's right, darling Critters, Amber and Bailey are floating free from the airlock to tackle quite the organism; Daniel Espinosa's 2017 sci-fi shocker, Life.

Join the crew for a spot of zero-gravity chitchat. Amber shares her terror of the ultimate lockdown scenario; being trapped in a space pod with her lifelong hero, James Cameron, terrified that the beloved director will end up starting a fight with her. Bailey, meanwhile, pitches a thrilling experiment; a movie that splices the DNA of 1988's Child's Play with 1995's Toy Story.

Enjoying your incubation in the Ctrl Alt Critique containment unit? Why not let your conversation evolve further. Float on across to our Discord Decontamination unit, scuttle toward our Instagram ISS airlock, and lurk between the TikTok test tubes. All specimens are welcome!

Music used in this episode:

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠“30-second Epic Trailer music” by Cinematic Music⁠⁠⁠⁠

⁠"Careless Whisper" by George Michael⁠

"Dreamer" by Danya Vodovoz

"Fight to Survive" by Jeremiah Kane

⁠⁠⁠⁠“Free News Intro” by Free Motion Graphics Background Animation⁠⁠⁠⁠

“⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Wardrobe MalfunKtion” by Danya Vodovoz⁠

Grab your Mül converter, plot a course for Alpha, and prepare to phase-shift with Amber and Bailey. That's right, Critters, this week the Ctrl Alt Critique gang are firing up their Astroship and diving headfirst into Luc Besson's 2017 visual buffet, Valerian and the City of a Thousand Planets!

Amber channels her inner Bubble, unpacking the pros and cons of Rihanna's shape-shifting cabaret act, questioning whether a glamourpod is the ultimate tool for infiltrating her school bullies' social circle. Bailey, meanwhile, gets down to brass tacks, debating the intergalactic ethics of powering an agriculture and diamond empire at the expense of an adorable space rodent.

Did you enjoy your stay in the city of a thousand ramblings? The conversation continues in our own edition of the Big Market! Phase on over to our Discord dimension, TikTok territory, and Instagram interstellar to join in on the intergalactic waffle.

Music used in this episode:

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠“30-second Epic Trailer music” by Cinematic Music⁠⁠⁠

⁠⁠⁠“Free News Intro” by Free Motion Graphics Background Animation⁠⁠⁠

“⁠⁠⁠⁠Wardrobe MalfunKtion” by Danya Vodovoz⁠

Lock up your wine cellars and check those slippers of yours, for Ctrl Alt Critique has scuttled back into sight!

Amber, Bailey, and Ad are emerging from the barn rafters to unleash a venomous second series on their unsuspecting critters, and they're starting matters off by spinning a fresh web around the 1990 Amblin classic, Arachnophobia.

Join the trio for their signature stridulating hullabaloo. Amber recounts tales of her many sleepless nights, courtesy of some window-peeping extra-terrestrials. Ad, channelling his inner Health & Safety Officer, develops a serious concern for the Jennings household's cavalier attitude when it comes to nail gun etiquette. Bailey, meanwhile, recounts memories of an amphibian-shaped intruder residing in his footwear.

Enjoying your time tangled in the Ctrl Alt Critique web? Why not descend deeper into the nest: rappel down the silk line to our Discord Drainpipe, crawl through our tangled Instagram Ivy, and lurk with us in the TikTok Tub. There’s always room for one more.

Music used in this episode:

⁠⁠⁠⁠“30-second Epic Trailer music” Produced by Cinematic Music⁠⁠

⁠⁠“Free News Intro” Produced by Free Motion Graphics Background Animation⁠⁠

“⁠⁠⁠Wardrobe MalfunKtion” Produced by Danya Vodovoz

It's been a while, but we're back, with our biggest episode yet! This time, we're thrilled to be joined by the terrific Ben Groves and delightful Rob Macfarlane, from The Every Movie Ever! Podcast. The boys have joined us in a frankly failed attempt to discuss the 2025 remake of Snow White.

The plan was to dish up some sizzling production facts, insightful takes on the making of this movie, and unique reflections on the narrative mechanics influencing the feature. Instead, we discuss organic fridges, Disney-themed mutants, manipulative fitness mirrors, Limp Bizkit's John Otto, and noise-cancelled headphones.

Up for 80 minutes of unfocused chaos? In which case, your dreams are about to come true.

Enchanted by the forest of chaos? Then grab your pickaxe, and whistle your way down to the our Discord⁠⁠ mine, Instagram⁠ quarry, and TikTok⁠⁠ pit, where the heigh-hoing never ends.

Music used in this episode:

⁠⁠⁠“30-second Epic Trailer music” Produced by Cinematic Music⁠

⁠“Free News Intro” Produced by Free Motion Graphics Background Animation⁠

“⁠⁠Wardrobe MalfunKtion” Produced by Danya Vodovoz