Codependency Is Controlling Your Relationships (And You Don’t See It) | #120
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Codependency, people-pleasing, and losing yourself in love — how to break the cycle and build real intimacy.
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Why do we lose ourselves in relationships, chase validation, and confuse caretaking with love?
This week we sit down with Ken to unpack the reality of codependency — from people-pleasing, conflict avoidance, and attachment anxiety to the addiction of needing validation from partners. We talk CoDA meetings, self-worth, intimacy avoidance, honesty in relationships, and the uncomfortable process of learning boundaries without losing compassion.
If you’ve ever felt responsible for fixing your partner, struggled to express needs, or stayed in unhealthy dynamics out of fear of abandonment, this episode will hit hard.
We also get into: • why codependent people struggle with identity • the difference between love and emotional dependency • learning to stop controlling outcomes and tolerate discomfort • how honesty builds real intimacy (even when it’s terrifying) • breaking the cycle of choosing “projects” instead of partners
This is a vulnerable, funny, and deeply honest conversation about recovery, relationships, and learning to finally choose yourself.
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