The Boys bring the usual chaos and somehow still manage to drop serious value along the way.

The guys kick things off debating which foods deserve to be wiped off the planet forever. Colton goes after applesauce for texture crimes, Ross makes a passionate case against cottage cheese calling it lumpy almost-spoiled milk, and Jess wants yellow squash gone for good. Ross also throws shade at mushrooms and beets noting they both taste like dirt no matter what you do with them, even while acknowledging that mushrooms literally run the communication network of forests. The whole thing is exactly as ridiculous and fun as it sounds.

On the project side Jess is launching Dills Dumpsters, a new side business he is standing up alongside his trim carpentry work. He walks through the logistics of running two trucks, getting his father-in-law set up as a subcontractor through a company they named D&D Exploration and Cattle Corp after a Landman episode, and why your Google business page matters more than almost anything when you are starting a local service company.

Colton has a new woodworking commission coming in from a rodeo connection designing a custom house. He is cutting decorative alder corbels for two-story exposed beams and adding custom cabinet doors with a relief cut of his clients personal tattoo design. The guys get into real detail on how to attach corbels to plaster walls, the right grain direction for corbels, and why one big long screw plus a plugged hole is often the cleanest solution.

The deep cut this episode is the history of tattoos and piercings as a skilled trade. Jess makes the case that tattooing and piercing are the oldest human crafts in existence, predating written language and trade guilds, showing up independently across ancient Egypt, Asia, South America, and Europe. They cover the evolution of tattoo styles from Polynesian influence on American traditional sailor tattoos to Japanese Irazumi to trash polka, touch on why implant grade titanium is the industry standard for piercing jewelry, and drop the wild fact that New York City banned tattoos all the way until 1997.

Ross shares his nugget on how he scored an $8500 Samsung smart fridge for $3150 by negotiating the floor model price, a scratch and dent discount, and a free delivery fee. The fridge has a built-in camera that lets you check your groceries from the store, suggests recipes based on whats inside, and even tracks expiration dates. The guys also break down why Guitar Center during the week is one of the best places to haggle.

Jess rounds things out with a practical stair building nugget on how to accurately measure and cut newel post heights using the stair rake method, flipping your post upside down and running a board across the nose of each step to get a consistent reference line regardless of uneven step heights.

Season four kicks off the first week of March and the guys still need listener submissions for the new episode naming theme. Hit like and subscribe wherever you listen and send those ideas in.

In this episode Ross does a Deep Dive into all things AI Related for makers and content creators.

In this week’s episode we Dive deep into AI

• Colton adds lime to his fajitas

• Jess asks where does all of the time go?
• Ross takes us on a wild AI adventure.

Good morning ladies and gentlemen this is your captain speaking and welcome aboard Beat Around the Bench Airlines flight 132 with nonstop service to Sassafras Country. Were cruising at an altitude of pure woodworking knowledge with your flight crew Jess Colton and Ross. Flight time today covers espresso machines hand tool techniques cutting board construction and sassafras wood discussion. Seatbelts fastened dust masks in upright position as we prepare for departure.

First up on beverage service were talking coffee and espresso. Colton got himself an espresso machine for Christmas brewing cappuccinos every morning. Two ounces espresso two ounces steamed milk foam on top ready to tackle the table saw. The crew discusses lattes versus cappuccinos how a latte is basically a milkshake with caffeine. Ross drops knowledge about Cuban cafecito fifty fifty cane sugar to espresso hits harder than a belt sander on walnut. He switched to Americanos with four shots of espresso diluted with water. Jess built a whole coffee bar with pot filler and Torani syrup pumps on a spinning acacia wood holder.

Reaching cruising altitude the boys dive into shop projects. Jess working on his massive cabinet build hand cutting dados and grooves. Coltons building cutting boards with his daughter teaching wood selection grain patterns proper glue ups. Father daughter woodworking time is the best shop time. He picked up black walnut comparing grain patterns density and working properties.

Main destination is sassafras wood discussion. This aromatic hardwood grows across eastern United States with unique characteristics for woodworkers. Distinctive smell like root beer because sassafras root was used to make root beer before FDA involvement. Relatively soft for hardwood works easily with hand tools and power tools takes finish beautifully. Color ranges from pale yellow sapwood to orange brown heartwood. Not dense as oak or maple but character makes beautiful furniture relatively affordable compared to exotic hardwoods.

Woodworkers discuss sourcing sassafras finding local sawmills best applications for underutilized species. Outdoor furniture boxes small decorative pieces all work with sassafras. Naturally rot resistant great for weather exposure projects.

Tool talk includes hand planes chisels marking gauges vintage versus modern production debate. Proper tool maintenance sharpening techniques buying quality tools once beats buying cheap tools three times. Jess shares wisdom about setting up hand planes correctly because poorly tuned plane is expensive paperweight.

Finishing discussion gets deep when Ross runs out of Halcyon mid spray. Calculate finish needs before starting because running dry halfway through a coat is turbulence over Rockies. He compares oil based versus water based polyurethane cleanup differences grain raising properties why oil based leaves richer tone. Application techniques spray versus brush proper ventilation non negotiable.

Ross brings AI automation knowledge implementing workflow automation for spirits sales territory. Chat bots lead generation systems Facebook auto responders. Technology moves faster than jet stream wind what you learn today outdated in three months but gotta start somewhere. Knowledge is power whether hand tool techniques or digital automation.

Safety nuggets include proper dust collection setup tool maintenance calculating finish quantities teaching next generation of woodworkers investing in future of craft.

Beginning descent now catch that Mullet Tools discount code BATB for five percent off at mullettools.com because quality dust collection accessories matter.

This has been Beat Around the Bench flight 132 where coffee is strong wood smells like root beer knowledge flows smoother than freshly planed sassafras. Thank you for flying with us remember to like subscribe and share this podcast. On behalf of entire flight crew we hope you enjoyed your journey see you on the next flight.

STEP RIGHT UP FOLKS FOR EPISODE 131 OF BEAT AROUND THE BENCH

Thats right ladies and gentlemen we got your hosts Jess Colton and Ross serving up the finest woodworking podcast this side of the Mississippi and theyre diving deep into Osage orange wood like you never heard before. Blue Osage Cult baby because nothing says rock and roll like dense hardwood that weighs more than your anvil.

You want vegetables with that? Course you do. These boys are talking broccoli preparation brussels sprouts cooked in bacon grease with pancetta and balsamic glaze sweet potatoes done up right and grilled asparagus that pairs perfect with a thick steak. Pro tip right here folks soak them brussels sprouts in cold salt water first gets rid of all that bitterness. Hot honey red pepper flakes lemon butter you name it theyre covering it all while the saw dust flies.

But wait theres more. Jess is building drawers for his big cabinet project using hand tools because sometimes you just gotta feel that wood under your fingers. Coltons got himself a Veritas dovetail saw and hes singing its praises louder than a Saturday night gospel choir. Tool reviews dont get better than this woodworking friends.

Now heres where it gets wild. Osage orange wood discussion that goes on longer than a Thanksgiving dinner argument. This woods got more nicknames than a career criminal hedge apple bodark monkey brain horse apple you name it. Native to Texas Arkansas Oklahoma but now its growing everywhere from New York to Nebraska. The wood itself is orange as a sunset denser than a brick harder than saying no to free pizza and itll dull your tools faster than you can say Blue Oyster Cult.

They talk sourcing this legendary lumber where to find it how to work it why your planer blades are crying. Jess shares his Osage experience Colton drops knowledge about wood movement and Ross keeps the whole show rolling smoother than a freshly waxed table saw top.

You get shop safety nuggets too because nearly getting brained by falling PVC dust collection pipes aint no joke. Ross almost caught his death when his dust collection system decided gravity was still a thing. The fix? Drive screws through those PVC joints folks. Tape aint enough when you got ten feet of six inch pipe hanging over your dome.

Dust collection talk runs deep with tips on magnets to catch metal shavings before they spark up your whole operation static electricity problems and the eternal struggle of keeping that shop air clean while youre making fine furniture.

Workshop wisdom flows like cheap beer at a county fair. Take your time on joinery layout. Check your dust collection rigging regular. Ground your system if the static is driving you bonkers. Get yourself a Sams Club MasterCard for that 5 percent cash back on gas if youre hauling lumber around.

Tool talk includes Rockler boom arms for dust collection benchtop planers that sound like angry hornets festool products that cost more than some folks cars and the eternal debate about which tools are worth the investment versus which ones are just pretty to look at in the catalog.

These three woodworkers keep it real keep it funny and keep the knowledge flowing faster than sawdust through a cyclone separator. From vegetable cooking tips to exotic hardwood properties from hand tool techniques to power tool reviews its all here in one spectacular episode.

The chemistry between hosts is tighter than a well cut dovetail joint. They joke they teach they share war stories from the workshop trenches and they remind everyone that woodworking is supposed to be fun even when youre wrestling with wood that fights back harder than Osage orange on a bad day.

So tune in subscribe share it with your woodworking buddies and whatever you do dont fear the reaper when that Osage orange dust starts flying. This is Beat Around the Bench Episode 131 where the wood is hard the laughs are easy and the knowledge is free for the taking.

Episode 130 Barenaked Larch - A Critical Review

★★★★½

What a remarkable evening at the podcast theater! This latest production from the Beat Around the Bench ensemble masterfully blends botanical education with culinary discourse while maintaining an absurdist comedy undercurrent that would make Beckett weep into his sawdust.

The opening act establishes dramatic tension with a philosophical inquiry into larch itself, revealing it as a deciduous conifer that bears cones yet sheds its needles in autumn. When Jess delivers his deadpan observation that his toenails do that sometimes, we enter a surrealist landscape where arboreal discourse and podiatric confessions occupy the same philosophical plane.

Colton's avant-garde performance piece involving sweet potato coins, smash burgers and burger sauce on tortillas represents culinary rebellion against conventional wrapping methodology. His monologue about toasting the burrito itself on the griddle demonstrates a character who dares to ask what if the vessel itself could be transformed. Revolutionary theater at its finest.

The centerpiece is Ross's extended soliloquy on the Milwaukee cordless paint sprayer, a meditation on technology and man's relationship with his tools. His passionate discourse on belt-mounted reservoirs and battery technology transforms product placement into Shakespearean examination. When he laments cleaning nozzles, we feel Sisyphus pushing his boulder as paint residue clogs the mechanism of progress.

The Survivor Trees segment elevates the production to operatic heights. Jess's narration of the Callery pear surviving September 11th rubble transcends historical recitation, becoming a meditation on resilience and nature's indomitable spirit. His restrained yet powerful performance guides us through the emotional landscape with a master storyteller's steady hand.

The Dragon Blood Trees finale contemplates umbrella-shaped Socotra flora that exude crimson resin and practice passive water harvesting through fog capture. The technical dialogue about resin saturation demonstrates botanical accuracy that makes serious dramaturgs swoon.

Minor quibbles prevent five stars, the pacing occasionally meanders and extended technological silences could benefit from musical underscoring. Yet these are trifling concerns in an otherwise tour de force. The ensemble chemistry crackles with authentic camaraderie as Jess narrates, Ross philosophizes and Colton provides comic relief without descending into buffoonery.

In conclusion, Barenaked Larch represents everything we expect from these players, intellectual rigor wrapped in conversational ease, technical expertise without condescension and abiding love for woodworking and ancient trees. Essential listening for anyone who appreciates performance art asking big questions like can tortillas contain all things and is fifteen hundred dollars too much for a cordless paint sprayer.

The answer is decidedly complex, much like the larch itself.

HIGHLY RECOMMENDED

In a world where Staceys mom has got it going on and one hit wonders reign supreme the crew unleashes the ultimate debate about fake bands that never existed but rocked harder than reality itself from Matt Damons legendary Euro Trip performance of Scotty Doesnt Know to Tom Hanks timeless That Thing You Do these fictional musicians changed the game forever

Three men face their greatest challenge yet choosing their favorite pasta as Colton demands the heat with spicy Cajun linguine loaded with fat noodles while Ross drops culinary wisdom bombs about cacio de pepe the Italian street food legend made with Parmesan pepper and the mysterious power of pasta water that binds it all together

But nothing could prepare them for what came next as Jess reveals the gnocchi paradox where balls of potato meet lakes of heavy cream creating the most dangerously delicious carb bomb known to mankind with two to three cups of cream packing enough calories to power a small nation yet tasting like heaven itself

When the conversation turns dark the guys uncover the shocking truth about mac and cheese the American classic pasta that cannot be denied and Jess confesses his downfall is pasta in all forms whether fettuccine spaghetti or that legendary steak gorgonzola creation with rare beef that haunts his dreams

Then the ultimate plant trivia showdown explodes as Ross delivers mind blowing facts about the indestructible Ginkgo tree that survived ground zero of the atomic bomb in Hiroshima withstanding 300000 degrees Celsius when the surface of the sun only reaches 6000 degrees proving this ancient species laughs in the face of nuclear annihilation

The legends continue with tales of the Sycamore Gap tree from Robin Hood Prince of Thieves standing for centuries in England until vandals nearly destroyed it two years ago threatening a landmark that witnessed history itself and the mysterious Methuselah bristlecone pine hidden somewhere in California whose location is kept secret to protect the oldest living organism on Earth

Witness the revelation that General Sherman the giant sequoia was once believed to be the oldest tree alive until scientists discovered an even more ancient survivor and decided humanity cannot be trusted with GPS coordinates because people ruin everything beautiful

The tension builds as the crew explores heart rot fungal infections and the brutal reality of compartmentalization where trees wage silent wars against disease building barriers within themselves to survive the centuries while lesser organisms perish in seasons

But the biggest mystery remains unanswered as they discuss parthogenesis cambia dormancy cycles and the eternal question of why horse chestnuts exist when crabapples are already a thing and whether trees remember the ice age through their cellular memory passed down through millennia

Coming this week to your podcast feed where the pasta flows freely the trees are immortal and Staceys mom still has it going on this is Beat Around the Bench Episode 129 where woodworking meets ancient botanical warfare and nobody leaves without learning something they never knew they needed to know

Jess makes his triumphant return after an amazing Puerto Rico vacation where he spent days laying by the pool eating taking naps and exploring the islands and he worked until 745 PM then drove an hour to make it to the podcast recording because he is a true champion

The crew dives into Puerto Rico real estate opportunities where Jess discovered you can live in downtown San Juan for just a thousand bucks a month in a two story apartment or buy one and rent the bottom to a business while living upstairs which is perfect for anyone with a remote work job

Christmas food traditions take center stage as the guys share their favorites with Jess revealing his massive cookie baking operation that went through 28 sticks of butter 10 pounds of sugar 8 pounds of brown sugar and 15 pounds of flour plus making 550 Ritz cracker peanut butter sandwiches dipped in chocolate almond bark to give out to everyone

Colton shares his family tradition of chicken fried venison backstrap with his mom's signature dark gravy that she makes from all the cooking drippings and it is tenderized and breaded perfectly with just the right amount of salt making it his mom's most iconic meal

Ross talks about his aunt's roast beef and Yorkshire pudding which is a traditional English meal that she only makes once a year on Christmas day because it is more difficult to prepare than you would think but it means Christmas to him since Yorkshire pudding is like a thick pita that is sweet and buttery like a crepe

The conversation touches on Starlink being an option for remote work in places like Belize where Colton tried to record from Cory and Larry's place but the WiFi was too shoddy though apparently that has been fixed now so maybe they can actually work from there

Ross drops essential washing machine maintenance knowledge about spraying bleach on the gasket and leaving it to dry which eliminates mold and bacteria plus using special fresh tablets that dissolve pet hair every two weeks so it can flush out of the filters instead of building up with bacteria

The crew discusses how harsh chemicals can eat hair without messing up clothes and Jess explains that lye is basically what super drain cleaner is made of since it eats anything organic which is why it works so well on clogs

Jess delivers an incredibly detailed hot water heater repair tutorial explaining that most tanks have two heating elements and you can check the wattage on the side sticker then turn off the 220 power drain the tank through the garden hose connection at the bottom and flip the pressure release valve to speed up draining

The hot water heater lesson continues with Jess explaining how to identify broken heating elements that have breaks in them which means the circuit is no longer complete so only one tank heats or nothing heats at all and you can replace these for just 18 to 30 dollars instead of paying hundreds for a plumber

Jess shares his multiple trips to Home Depot saga trying to fix a leaking 1970s shutoff valve that was soldered in and discovering it works just like a water hose spigot with a nut under the handle that tightens a rubber gasket around the shaft which he was able to clean up and tighten instead of replacing

The crew welcomes special guest Lee Dumond from Busted Knuckle Woodworks who is recording from his incredibly organized shop in Austin Texas and is about to hit the magical 100,000 subscriber milestone on YouTube after three years of grinding which means he will finally get that silver play button

Lee drops some serious knowledge about why hitting 100K on YouTube is actually meaningful because the verification checkmark you get is literally the only checkmark left on social media that you cannot buy since Twitter Instagram Facebook and Meta all sell verification for just 10 bucks a month making YouTube verification an actual achievement you have to earn

The conversation dives into Lee's background building outdoor furniture in Texas where it is sunny 300 days a year compared to his Maine upbringing which only has three months of summer and nine months of poor sledding and how outdoor furniture was extremely lucrative because people in Texas spend so much time outside

Lee shares his powerful story about getting cancer and going through chemo and radiation which made it impossible to lift the heavy materials needed for building arbors and pergolas so he pivoted to creating smaller projects like jewelry boxes and bandsaw boxes as a creative outlet during treatment

The YouTube journey started when Lee spread out all his bandsaw boxes on his table and set up a camera to talk about how he made each one including the wood types and finishes and that single video sparked his entire channel growth over the past three years

Ross reveals that his top three performing YouTube videos are all outdoor furniture builds including a simple outdoor bench that has gotten insane views proving that outdoor furniture content performs incredibly well on the platform even for small channels

Lee explains that his SawStop actually saved his hand from a table saw kickback incident where a piece of cedar smashed into his knuckles which is how he came up with the name Busted Knuckle Woodworks and he keeps the brake cartridge disk of shame displayed in his shop

The discussion touches on Lee's unique lifestyle living part-time in Paris France and how he creates casual Patreon content about random topics like American fast food in Paris while just sitting at his table saw or walking around the shop talking about whatever is on his mind

Lee shares his incredible quote that winners want feedback while losers want praise explaining that honest feedback is the most valuable thing you can get in any endeavor and when someone tells him his video sucked instead of praising it that person becomes way more valuable to him

The crew mentions that Lee has been on four podcasts now since WorkbenchCon where he met Alex Duffy who made it his mission to get Lee on podcasts after learning Lee had been a podcast host but never a guest and now he has over 1800 Patreon members supporting his work

Ross announces a special 15 percent discount code BATB15% for Gearhart Industry custom branding irons that works for the rest of the year whether you need branding irons for food leather furniture or any other custom branding project