"At 18, Ryan thought being a real man meant fighting, drinking and never showing weakness. By 29, he'd lost the plot entirely. Two years sober, 10 years talking about mental health online, and in this episode, he breaks down exactly where that version of masculinity breaks you."

At 18, Ryan had a pretty clear picture of what it meant to be a man. Fight hard. Drink hard. Never show weakness. Don't talk about how you're feeling.

It took him a decade to realise how badly that blueprint was breaking him.

Ryan is a voice actor, DJ, music producer, and MMA competitor. He's also been talking about mental health online for almost 10 years, and he's two years sober after years of hiding behind the "fun guy" persona.

In this episode, we get into where that idea of masculinity came from, who his role models were growing up, and what martial arts gyms actually taught him about being a man, the good and the bad.

We talk about the drinking, the escapism, and the slow unravelling that happens when you build your whole identity around looking like you've got it together.

And we talk about what it actually takes to rebuild sobriety, accountability, mental health, and what Ryan thinks masculinity should actually look like now.

For any young man who's ever felt like he had to pretend he was fine, this one's worth listening to.

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