In this episode of Hard Things Podcast, we read a Youtube listener's ( @nicolajones2579 ) email that spirals into a conversation about modern dating, attraction standards, and the way men and women completely misunderstand each other online.From unsolicited messages… to viral relationship advice debates… to the harsh reality of how people judge compatibility — we unpack the difference between honesty, cruelty, and communication.We talk about:• Why people send explicit photos in the first place• How internet dating advice goes off the rails• Are people “aiming too high” or just incompatible?• The truth about attraction vs personality• Why criticism feels personal in dating• Standards vs expectations vs negotiation• The role of confidence, success, and appearance• What actually keeps relationships working long-termThis episode isn’t about blaming men or women — it’s about why we keep talking past each other.Chapters00:00 – Intro02:40 – Listener email & unexpected messages12:10 – Why people send photos they shouldn’t20:30 – Internet dating advice gone wrong33:00 – Attraction vs personality debate46:20 – Standards vs expectations58:40 – Why criticism feels like rejection1:08:00 – Communication problems between men & women1:18:30 – What actually makes relationships last1:26:00 – Final thoughts