In this episode of the Betrayal Trauma Recovery Bookshelf, I circle back to Broken to Brave by Tammy Gustafson to share my personal takeaways and review.

For many women, there comes a confusing moment in recovery: You finally feel a sense of safety and stabilization, and then, suddenly and unexpectedly, you are hit with a wave of intense emotion that feels like you are right back at the beginning.

This is what Tammy calls "The Rumble" - Phase 2. It is a counterintuitive, paradoxical space where your nervous system finally feels safe enough to process the deep grief and anger it has been holding.

I dive into this "messy middle" and offer a new perspective on why feeling worse can actually mean you are healing.

We talk about:

• The Counterintuitive Nature of Phase 2: Why intense emotions often surface after you establish safety, not before.

• The "ECU" (Emotional Care Unit): Why we need to treat emotional injuries with the same intensive care as physical trauma, just because the "truck" has stopped hitting you, doesn't mean the healing is done.

• Healing Hurts: Using the metaphor of my shattered elbow and physical therapy to illustrate how true healing (like grieving) is often a painful process.

• Redefining Anger: Moving away from the belief that anger is dangerous or "bad," and seeing it as a vital, necessary part of the human experience and connection with God.

• Grief as Acceptance: How the "stages" of grief (shock, denial, bargaining, sadness) are actually a process of accepting reality.

This episode may be especially supportive if:

• You feel like you are moving backward in your recovery and are wondering, "What is happening?"

• You are experiencing sudden, visceral anger or deep sadness and feel confused or ashamed by its intensity.

• You find yourself bargaining or minimizing the abuse (e.g., "At least he didn't hit me") to soften the blow.

• You need permission to treat yourself with extreme gentleness, like a patient in the ICU.

Healing is not a linear journey, and it doesn't always feel "good." Sometimes, it feels like the deep ache of physical therapy, stretching, and healing wounds that have been braced for too long.

Listen in for a validating, honest look at the "Rumble Phase" and receive the reminder you need today: You can make it. Hold on. Keep going.

Meet the Author: Tammy Gustafson

Tammy Gustafson is a trauma-informed licensed professional counselor, coach, and speaker with over 15 years of experience. She holds a master’s degree in counseling and is the founder and CEO of Betrayal Healing and LiveFree Counseling. Tammy hosts the annual Betrayal Healing Conference, which provides compassionate, expert guidance to thousands of betrayed partners worldwide.

The Betrayal Healing Conference

January 26-30, 2026

https://010850311--betrayalhealing.thrivecart.com/all-access-pass/

Book link on Amazon (available for preorder): Broken to Brave: Your Courageous Act of Healing After Intimate Betrayal

https://www.amazon.com/Broken-Brave-Courageous-Intimate-Betrayal/dp/0800746554/ref=sr_1_5?crid=1YM58EIZVN5T9&dib=eyJ2IjoiMSJ9.6O2P1kd86DCW296OpIUqfFQ_GXVylvGe8TTX7k8z890ZwUrgT55wIkf2iKz5R_vN3oYZRO8y6bVxuO92_9Im3chK-ANA6qeWSZDimFeV-Z8FI8zLkRzE8ZrrDwZq5EyQcVwcPSFQnk6YqLOT8OHiBCb0pK8fep98L01NPf6vYfWzi0ovxtsPXqBYgxdiekG_lZU5F7z3UP9PpWUl_3GadAkA0yZ0aVqhMVy6MEV5t3E.OX-VvvQCIX7WmIXxBNQo2vY4Rg4i3OhoQgwMRJboLOQ&dib_tag=se&keywords=broken+to+brave+book&qid=1764652534&sprefix=broken+to+brave+book%2Caps%2C135&sr=8-5

Tammy’s Website

tammygustafson.com

Rachel’s Booklist

https://www.amazon.com/hz/wishlist/ls/17C3H1PVHJ5N9?ref_=wl_share

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