Why does Virginia’s Question 2 matter to my marriage?

My wife Lauri and I voted “yes” on Question 2, the proposed amendment to the Virginia Constitution that would remove the state’s existing constitutional ban on same-sex marriage and require Virginia to recognize and treat all legally valid marriages equally, regardless of sex, gender, or race.

Same-sex marriage is currently protected by the U.S. Supreme Court’s 2015 Obergefell v. Hodges decision. But Virginia’s Constitution still contains the language adopted in 2006 that says only a union between a man and a woman may be recognized as a marriage.

I don't know what would happen to existing same-sex marriages if Obergefell were ever overturned. That's precisely why I think removing that language from Virginia's Constitution matters.

And Question 2 isn't only about same-sex marriage. It would also protect marriage regardless of race, bringing to mind Virginia's history with Loving v. Virginia.

If you live in Virginia, Question 2 is on the 2026 ballot. Here's why it matters to me—and to my marriage.

You can find the transcript at https://spectrumpodcast.org/2026/09/30/why-question-2-matters-to-my-marriage/

00:00 Early Voting Has Begun

00:22 What Is Question 2?

00:49 Why Question 2 Matters to My Marriage

01:03 The Risk If Obergefell Is Overturned

01:55 Why That Risk Isn't Hypothetical

02:22 Explicitly Protecting Our Marriages

02:29 Question 2 Protects More Than Same-Sex Marriage

02:37 Loving v. Virginia and Marriage Equality

03:05 What Question 2 Would Protect

03:14 Why I'm Asking You to Vote Yes

03:28 The American Ideal Behind Question 2

What does it mean to be non-binary when you don’t feel like either a man or a woman?

In this episode of The Spectrum, Kris shares their experience of discovering they are non-binary and agender. For much of their life, Kris simply thought they weren’t very good at being a woman. It wasn’t until the pandemic, when they encountered the language of gender identity and discovered other people with similar experiences, that another possibility began to make sense.

Linda and Kris talk about discovering a non-binary identity later in life, the difference between gender identity and sexual orientation, and why being agender is different from other non-binary experiences. They also explore pronouns, language, family, work, medical care, and what it is like to move through a world where people often make assumptions about your gender.

Kris explains why they/them pronouns matter to them, while also describing the complicated reality of being perceived as female despite identifying as agender. They talk about keeping “mom” as a title for their children, finding gender-neutral language that works for their family, and even using their name instead of pronouns when someone is still getting used to they/them.

Most importantly, this is a conversation about discovering that “I don't fit either” can be an identity of its own—and about what it means simply to be recognized as a person.

Find the transcript at: https://spectrumpodcast.org/?p=860

00:00 What Does It Mean to Be Non-Binary?

00:55 What Does Agender Mean?

01:25 Discovering a Non-Binary Identity

02:54 Growing Up Without Feeling Like a Girl

03:47 “I Don’t Fit Either”

04:10 Pansexuality, Bisexuality and Gender Identity

05:07 Compartmentalizing Gender and Sexuality

06:04 Finding Language and Other People Like Me

08:46 Non-Binary Identity, Marriage and Top Surgery

09:43 Body Dysphoria and Gynecological Care

11:27 Non-Binary Voice, Gender Perception and Pronouns

12:42 Coming Out as Non-Binary to Family and Work

14:01 Non-Binary Parents and Gender-Neutral Language

16:17 Being Non-Binary at Work and in Public

18:01 Non-Binary People and Medical Care

20:11 Being Misgendered and Living as Non-Binary

21:14 Why Pronouns Can Be Complicated

22:02 Choosing Whether to Be Open About Pronouns

23:30 Gender-Neutral Language Beyond Pronouns

24:00 How Non-Binary People Relate to Men and Women

24:49 Why Defaulting to Neutral Language Can Help

25:28 Understanding Non-Binary Identity

26:02 “I’m a Person, Just Like Anyone Else”

26:43 You Don’t Have to Agree With Someone to Be Kind

27:57 One Person’s Experience of Being Non-Binary

The episode explores the history and significance of pronouns in the English language, the challenges of gendered pronouns, the emergence of non-binary pronouns, and the importance of respecting and using correct pronouns for individuals. It emphasizes the impact of pronouns on emotional well-being and the need for acceptance and validation.

Chapters

• 00:00 The History of Pronouns
• 01:36 Gendered Pronouns in English
• 02:44 Non-Binary Pronouns
• 05:57 Resistance to Change
• 07:25 Importance of Using Correct Pronouns
• 11:06 The Problem with Pronouns

You can find the transcript at: https://spectrumpodcast.org/?p=678