Louis opens a celestial box and pulls out The Party Planner, an airship that shakes up their tactics for Faction Wars. We break down the new fast-travel mechanics, why this kind of tech shows up so late in the series, and what it means for the escalating scale of the dungeon.

Carl spirals over leftover Christmas tinsel, simulations within simulations, and the AI’s chilling monologue about civilizations that wipe themselves out.

Spoilers through Book 7.

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In this episode of The Apocalypse Will Be Podcasted, we break down Chapter 5 of This Inevitable Ruin, where a safe room turns into controlled chaos courtesy of a new pet, a naming war, and several questionable decisions.

We unpack Donut’s meltdown over Carl keeping the tummy acre, the tiniest adorable meatball. Between AI meddling, cursed food boxes, and a hair regrowth kit that absolutely should not exist, this chapter blends comedy with quiet mechanical setup.

It’s a deceptively busy chapter, layering relationship tension, power scaling, and logistical groundwork that will matter far more than it initially seems.

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In this episode of The Apocalypse Will Be Podcasted, we break down Dante’s chapter from This Inevitable Ruin, a quiet but devastating look at former crawlers, the Dungeon Anarchist Cookbook, and Justice Light’s past.

We unpack Dante’s guilt as a Cookbook author, the mechanics of indenture and reassignment, and how this chapter quietly establishes Justice Light’s moral code, and the cost of refusing to bend it. What reads as background lore quickly becomes heavy foreshadowing for consequences that ripple through the series.

It’s a restrained chapter with brutal implications, ending in a bleak revelation.

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This week we breakdown chapter 4 of This Inevitable Ruin. Carl and Donut’s loot box bonanza continues, stacking them with wildly overpowered upgrades, unhinged gifts, and one truly terrifying celestial potion. We break down Donut’s coping mechanisms, Carl’s growing arsenal, and Mordecai's potion obsession. Plus: Samantha tries to kill Tish, we finally get to talk about other characters, and we end with Donut learning about Carl's secret pet.

It’s loot box o’clock, and Princess Donut is cleaning up. Carl and Donut crack open a ridiculous amount of loot boxes that includes trench-building scrolls, cursed spellbooks, and the wildly overpowered Tiara of a Thousand Lights. As Donut starts turning ugly hats into raw magical firepower, things quickly get dark with the "You're Not Done Yet" spell.

We also break down the mechanics of Quan’s Cloak of the Benevolent Champion, how it turns Donut into a god-tier tank, and how the AI might have nudged Quan to become a villain.

Add in exploding space chickens and Mongo getting potion balls broken on his butt, and this chapter becomes pure setup for absolute chaos.

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In this episode of The Apocalypse Will Be Podcasted, we dive into Chapter 2 of This Inevitable Ruin, where Carl, Donut, and Mordecai hide hang out in the safe room and sift through an absolutely unhinged pile of achievements, spells, and loot.

We break down Donut’s growing arsenal (ghillie suit, boonie hat, anti-air spells, and more), how her power curve is quietly getting terrifying, and why some of these abilities feel less flashy but way more dangerous. Mordecai finally gets the potion upgrade of his dreams, Mongo is still tragically one-winged, and the ceasefire continues to feel ominous.

Carl racks up a parade of bizarre achievements, including demon-related milestones, cursed food box “upgrades,” sentient weapon warnings, and some of the wildest AI flavor text in the series so far. We also get a brand-new quest from Emberus that will eventually derail everything in the best possible way.

It’s a quieter chapter on the surface — but it’s packed with foreshadowing, trauma, and deeply unsettling soup.

Merry Christmas, y’all. This week we’re taking a short break from regular episodes—because this is real Christmas, not fake Christmas—but we didn’t want to leave the season unmarked.

Dungeon Crawler Carl means a lot more to us than explosions, an unhinged AI, and a talking cat. At its core, it’s about refusing to be broken, about surviving together, and about the truth that no one gets out alive alone. With that spirit in mind, we wanted to use this moment to talk about mutual aid.

Whether it’s donating food, clothes, money, or time, there are so many ways to support your community—especially during and after the holidays. We talk about practical ways to help, what actually benefits unhoused folks, and why January matters just as much as December. From food pantries to simple, human-scale acts of care, there is something everyone can do if they have the spoons.

We know this time of year can be hard for a lot of people. So consider this a reminder, straight from the dungeon: we are stronger together.

Happy holidays, and we’ll see you in the New Year.

Faction Wars officially begins, and Chapter One wastes no time setting the tone. Carl and Donut arrive in Larracos, the City of Dreams, and are immediately confronted with rules, countdowns, and shark sushi.

We break down how Faction Wars is structured, what makes this season different, and why it feels less like a competition and more like a trap. Between new class decisions, unresolved consequences from previous floors, and an AI growing increasingly comfortable pushing boundaries, it’s clear this floor will move fast—and mistakes won’t be survivable.