RESOLUTION! Every plot line comes together in the Super Big Happy Ending, with only five or six permanently life-altering injuries. The USA and Mexico are bestest buddies forever. The Zolars find out why you never double-cross academics. Giordino was horny once, and it changed his life forever. Doctor Shannon gets off on being the Other Woman. Miles is also here. Rudi enjoys a nice breeze. Pitt holds his nose and takes the plunge... into marriage! (OR DOES HE?!)

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VIOLENCE! Dirk returns to his primal element: the water! He sneaks up on the bad guys from behind, while Billy Yuma sneaks up on the bad guys from the front. Loren and Rudi join in the violence, but no-one seems to notice. Giordino ends up several inches shorter. Dirk gets another limp wrist. Tupac takes a spin in the lazy river. A bunch of mooks get memory holed. You can't have shit in Cerro El Capirote. Oh, and the bad guys still escape with all the treasure. ONE MORE EPISODE TO GO!

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A slightly shorter episode this week, but we make up for it by being highly caffeinated! It's reunions all around. The bad guys get together to discuss how AWESOME everything is going, how they'll divvy up the treasure, and of course who is going to backstab who for a larger cut. The good guys (sand Loren and Rudi) get together to discuss how bad everything is going, how America simply cannot stand up to the geopolitical and military powerhouse that is the Mexican Border Authority, and how sexy Dirk is when he's laughing at death. Loren gives up hope. The Moores rekindle their romance. The Demon Of Death sees a helicopter and experiences ennui.

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