Women hear two main messages about getting older. One says fight it: buy the creams, keep pushing, treat ageing as a problem you can solve if you just try hard enough. The other says pretend: smile when you want to cry, be grateful, find the silver lining.

I've tried both and neither worked for me.

In this episode I share:

• What fighting looked like when I went back to the heavy weights after two painful disc herniations, and why I told myself I was fine.
• What pretending looked like when a friend said, “I didn’t realise it was that bad for you,” and why I spent the next few days making sure nobody could see.
• A third way that’s simpler and often harder: paying attention to what’s really happening, letting yourself feel it, and deciding what matters to you.
• What that looks like in real life, from her mum saying, “At least you’ve still got your health and mobility,” to being overlooked at a cafe.

None of these moments are dramatic, and that’s the point. Ageing honestly isn’t one big breakthrough. It’s the small moments when you tell the truth instead of following the old scripts.

If you’d like some structure for this, I've created the Stop Fighting Yourself course. It’s a self-paced, practical 30-day program based on one idea: it takes less energy to notice what’s really going on than to keep struggling against it.

Details are in the link below.

https://www.penelopelane.com.au/stop-fighting-yourself-course-women-over-60

Penelope Lane. Ageing Honestly. Whole Strength.

Share what's actually true for you. I'd love to hear it, and I'll write back 🌷

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Holistic, independent women: resistance to what’s happening creates chronic stress that accelerates aging. Buddhist teachings that help you accept ageing without giving up after 60 change everything.

The shocking truth: The harder you fight against getting older, the faster you age.
Your resistance is literally accelerating your decline.

The Two Arrows (Practical Buddhist Teaching):
First Arrow: Ageing itself—your body changing, things getting harder. This hurts. It's real.
Second Arrow: YOUR resistance to ageing. "This shouldn't be happening." "I hate this." "Why me?" This is the suffering you ADD on top of ageing.

Here's the insight that changes everything: You can't control the first arrow. But the second arrow? That's entirely in your hands.

What Your Resistance Actually Does:
- Creates chronic stress that shrinks your hippocampus (brain's memory centre), accelerates cellular ageing, increases inflammation, disrupts sleep.
- Makes you rigid when you need to be flexible and resilient
- Exhausts you—stealing energy you could use to build strength.

The Paradox:
When you STOP fighting reality, you have MORE power to work with it.
Acceptance frees you to find creative solutions, adapt, and build real strength.
Acceptance isn't giving up. It's seeing what's true without adding suffering on top: "My body is changing. This is hard. I hate it sometimes. And that's what's happening."

In the video, I share a practical strategy to help you navigate the truth: You can hate getting older AND accept it's happening AND love who you're becoming.

Stop shooting yourself with that second arrow. Your resistance is ageing you faster. Acceptance is what slows decline.

Share what's actually true for you. I'd love to hear it, and I'll write back 🌷

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"I'm fine, thanks." I've said it a thousand times without really meaning it, and I bet you have too.

In this episode, I talk about that habit: the automatic " I’m fine" that slips out before you even think.

I’ll explore why we do it, what it costs us, and how it can leave you feeling unheard even when you're with others.

I’ll also share what happens, even physically, when you finally say what’s really true to someone who truly listens.

I'm Penelope, a clinical psychologist and fitness trainer helping women over 60 age in ways that work with their bodies and minds, not against them.

Share what's actually true for you. I'd love to hear it, and I'll write back 🌷

Support the show